Catch Me
by That Girl Again
Summary: Bella was the nobody back in Phoenix, but when she moves to Forks, she discovers love, and she's not sure she wants it. Will she let Edward catch her? All human. Rated T for mild language and because I'm paranoid.
1. Chapter 1

**Ok, new story. This is based **_**loosely**_** on Demi Lovato's song **_**Catch Me**_**. **

**BPOV:**

Hi, I'm Bella Swan. Just your average, everyday girl. I have brown hair and eyes to match with extremely pale. I am currently in my new room in my new house; the house of my father. See, I moved to Forks because my mother got re-married and wanted to travel with her husband, and even though she wanted to be with me, I came to my Dad's for the rest of my schooling, which was only a year and a half. I know it made her happy to be with Phil, her husband, so it made me happy too, even if Forks wasn't my favorite place.

Back in my other school, I was the outsider. I was shy, clumsy, and average. I wasn't popular and I kept to myself, reading my book in the corner, or not talking to most people. I hadn't had friends, or boyfriends, just Kim, the girl that had showed me around the first day. She talked to me sometimes, and she'd tried to get me a boyfriend, but since I was a pale nobody surrounded by tanned and blonde Barbie dolls, nobody really liked me.

I know most people don't like being alone, because they think they need guys or friends to complete them, but I think that's sick. I mean, if I have a book, an iPod or paper & pen, I'm fine. I didn't mind being alone. I just hoped it stayed that way here in Forks, where novelties were few and far in between.

Anyway, enough about the past, let's get back to the present. I stared at the light blue walls with the white stars and the posters with my favorite singers, the black bedspread, the light-green carpet. This room was just how I loved it: Nice, light touches with everything I loved. Like me, my favorite singers were all teens and nice and great, the one difference was that they weren't afraid to speak their minds, when I was.

I thought about tomorrow: Doomsday. The first day of school in Forks High. It would be just like in Phoenix; I would arrive, everybody would gossip, after a week they'd get sick of me and I'd be the Bella that everyone ignores. I went to bed and woke up the next morning feeling slightly optimistic. I mean, I liked being ignored, because nobody cared about me, but what if this time it was different? What if I made friends?

I took a shower and put on my black eyeliner, my skinny jeans, my Converse, my purple long-sleeve shirt and an ivory hoodie over it, then let my hair fall loose and wavy and put on some silver earrings and went downstairs to breakfast. Charlie made eggs and bacon, ate, wished me good luck and went to the Police Station. I finished eating and drove to the school in my truck, got the schedule, and walked toward English class, where the teacher gave me a book and a reading list.

The teacher didn't introduce me, but started a lecture that bored me. Every other class was like that. The teacher would give me my book, I'd sit down, he'd start a lecture and then class would end. I was rather grateful for Lunch, something that never happened.

I got my food and sat at an empty table, well, almost empty. I sat on one extreme and five people sat on the other. As I sat down, they all looked at me, and quickly looked away, but I still saw their faces.

They were the most beautiful faces I'd ever seen. There were two girls and three boys. The girls were opposites, one with long blonde hair, tall and curvy, the other with short, spiky black hair, short and thin to the extreme. They were both pale, and blondie had brown eyes, while the Pixie had pool blue eyes.

One of the boys was huge, like, really muscular, and had curly dark hair and dark eyes, with paleness to match the girls'. Another had honey blonde hair and was muscular, but not as much as the other, and he had brown eyes identical to the blonde girl's. The last boy was gorgeous. He had bronze colored hair that was quite the perfect amount of messy, and emerald green eyes.

I went back to eating , and reading my book. They looked like the kind of people who were popular and rich, and I'd learned from experience that people like me and people like them don't get along.

After lunch, I had Biology, so I went to the classroom and instead of chairs and desks, there were tables for two. I went to the teacher, Mr. Banner, and he gave me the book and assigned me an empty table in about the middle on the right side of the classroom, next to the window. I sat and took my book and opened it, skimming through it while the rest of the class walked in from lunch.

As I expected, some people came in whispering and pointed in my direction, but as usual, like a true outsider, I ignored it. I wasn't looking, so I was surprised when the chair next to mine moved and someone put their book down on the table. I looked up.

It was the bronze-haired boy from the table at lunch. He sat and looked at me, then extended his hand.

"Hi, I'm Edward Cullen," he said in a voice that sent butterflies in my stomach.

"I'm Bella. Bella Swan. Well, actually, my name's Isabella, but I like Bella, so call me that." Oh Gosh, I was babbling. Not good.

"Ok, you're new here, right?" He asked.

"Yeah."

The teacher called attention and began his lecture, like every other teacher in the school. Honestly, don't we get homework, or projects, or _something_? I already know half of what the teachers are teaching here.

After the class, I walked to Gym and in the locker room, the Pixie from Lunch looked up at me and said: "Hi, I'm Alice. Are you Bella?"

As I was putting on my shorts, I said: "Um, yes. Nice to meet you Alice."

"Would you like to have a sleepover? I'm having one with Rose, my sister, on Friday. You wanna come? We can go right after school," she said abruptly.

"R-really?" Miss Nobody was getting asked to go to a sleepover? Pinch me, I must be dreaming.

Ok, ow! Why'd you do that? I know I'm awake! It's a figure of speech!

"Yeah! I'm sure you'll have fun! Please?" She even did the puppy dog face!

"Yeah, I'll ask my Dad if it's ok," I said, giving in.

"Thank you! You'll meet my family!"

We walked into Gym discussing what I would take for the sleepover, and when the coach told us to do a mile, I groaned, but did it anyway.

Finally, it was time to go home and pack for Alice's sleepover, and as I was heading towards my truck, Alice walked toward me and stopped me.

"Bella, do you mind if my brother, Edward, and I go to your house to do homework? Our house is being fumigated and there isn't enough space for us where we're staying with our mom and dad," she asked.

"You mean Edward Cullen?" She nodded. "Sure. You wanna ride with me or follow me in a car?"

"We'll ride with you." And with that, she waved her hand behind her shoulder and Edward Cullen came running toward us.

"Hi," I said.

"Hey," he said.

I walked towards my truck, opened the locks, told them to come inside and when they started fighting over who would go in the passenger seat, I said: "Alice, how tall are you?"

"4'10". Why?"

"Edward?"

"I'm 6'2"."

"Well, that settles it. Alice, you're smaller, so climb in the back seat. Edward, you go up front." They followed orders and soon, I was getting near my house.

I parked and locked the car when we were outside, then unlocked the door and showed them to the kitchen.

"This is where I'll be living for the next two years. That's the kitchen… Charlie's other baby, the flat-screen TV… Upstairs' my room, the bathroom and Charlie's room. Got it?" I said. "Follow me, we're going to my room."

I went to my room, glad I'd cleaned yesterday, and opened the door. My bed was made, the CDs and books I'd brought were all in shelves, my closet was closed and there were shoes outside it, with the exception of my black Converse.

"Cute!" Alice chirped. "What music do you have?" She went to the shelf over the desk where my laptop and checked my CDs.

"You like Taylor Swift? And Demi Lovato? OMG! Me too!" She squealed.

"Is she always like this?" I whispered to Edward, who had been standing closer to me than I'd thought.

"Yeah, we think she ought to take a pill or something, but she _says_ she doesn't need it. I don't believe that," he whispered back. He grinned. "Can I see what you're reading?"

"Yeah, but didn't you have homework?" I asked, suddenly recalling why they were here.

"Well, Alice does, but she'll do it when she gets home."

"Oh, ok. Alice? Alice! You guys want something to eat, or drink…?"

"No thanks, maybe later. Can we watch some TV?" She said.

"Uh, I guess. But are you going to help me pack for the sleepover?" I asked, not caring if Edward was there.

"Yeah, later!" And with that, she took off down the stairs and I heard the TV turn on.

"I think I have a pill that will probably knock her out for a good three hours, do you want it?" I asked Edward, who was still reading my book titles.

"I need to check it, because she's allergic to certain things…" I walked out and brought him the pills I used to get eight solid hours of dreamless sleep.

"This knocks me out for eight hours, but Alice is something else, so I think for her it'll be three."

"Why don't you go look for her? I'll stay here and read the ingredients…" He started reading the fine print.

I walked downstairs, toward the sound of the TV. Alice was sitting cross-legged on the couch, looking at the TV, but it was some show I didn't like, so I turned my attention to Alice.

"Edward likes you," she said.

"Excuse me?" What did she say?

"Edward is starting to like you. Before I went to you, you were all he was talking about. And he said you're beautiful. That means he's starting to like you," she said.


	2. Chapter 2

**Ok, you read the first chapter and told me what you thought. Now here's the second one. Do the same.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, Demi Lovato or an iPhone.**

**-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

**BPOV:**

"_Edward likes you," she said._

"_Excuse me?" What did she say?_

"_Edward is starting to like you. Before I went to you, you were all he was talking about. And he said you're beautiful. That means he's starting to like you," she said._

And I was speechless. Then I burst out laughing.

"Good… one… Ali-Alice. Ah, that's funny! Whoo," I said between laughs.

"I'm serious. He's never done that before… Where is he, anyway?"

"I'll go check…" I got up and went to my room, where I saw Edward sitting on the bed, with a book in his hands, reading. He looked up when I cleared my throat.

"Oh, sorry. It's just, I wanted this book, but I never got it. I… How's Alice?" He sounded embarrassed. Probably at getting caught reading something he shouldn't have.

"She is watching some random show as attentively as a 5-year-old watching _Barney_," I said. "You can borrow it, if you like. I've read it twice, so you can take it…"

"Thanks. What're you playing?" He turned on my speakers where my iPod was, and _U Got Nothin' On Me_ started. I blushed and fumbled with the zipper on my hoodie, then took it off and turned up the heat in the house. I returned to my room, where the song was still playing while Edward was looking around, seeing my music.

"You want something?" I asked awkwardly.

"Yeah, I have to read something. Let's go with Alice," he said.

I wordlessly led him to the kitchen, where I got myself some water while Edward just took the book I lent him and read. I peeked and immediately recognized it; _Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows_. Odd. Every _Harry Potter _fan got their copy when it came out.

The door opened. Charlie came in, looking surprised at the TV on, me in the kitchen and two kids he probably didn't know in the house.

"Hi Dad! These are Edward and Alice. They were _supposed_ to do homework, but Alice prefers to watch TV…"

"Hi, Bells. Edward." He nodded. "Bella, I'm going to dinner at Harry Clearwater's in twenty minutes, you coming?"

"Alice came out and whispered something in Edward's ear. Edward's lip twitched. He whispered something back, but looked defeated, then turned to face my father and me.

"Bella, would you like to have dinner at our house?" He said.

I turned and looked expectantly at Charlie. He looked at me questiongly and I winked. "Sure, you can go, Bells."

"Thanks, I'll go."  
Charlie went to his room after hanging his gun up and after a few minutes, I heard the unmistakable sound of the shower. I went to my room and grabbed the book I was currently reading: _Evermore_. I'd just started and I was hooked. **(Author's Note: Don't spoil it for me, I'm by page 137. Really!)**

I went back downstairs, where Edward was reading, Alice was writing on a notebook and I took my seat across from Edward, where I'd set my glass. He looked up, smiled and continued reading. I kept on reading, and after a while, listened to some music.

Charlie came downstairs wearing jeans, a polo and as he said goodbye he grabbed his jacket.

"Bella, can you come with me to your room?" Alice asked.

"Um, ok," I said.

I followed her on the way to my room, sending confused glances at Edward, but he ignored them. Alice and I entered my room and I sat on the bed. She closed the door, looked at me, took a deep breath, and said: "I told you my brother likes you, and you know I want to be your friend, but please, please tell me if you like Edward… It kills me to not know! Tell me!"

"Look, I just met him, Alice. I don't know him… well. If I ever do like him, I promise you'll be the first to know, but right now, the only answer I can give you is not something you wanna hear," I said, knowing what I said was true.

"I think you should get ready to go, Bella," Alice said quietly.

"What should I wear?"

"That outfit's fine, but wear some heels or something. Ok?"

"I have flats, not heels," I said. I went over and took out some shiny black flats and put them on, then I looked at Alice. She looked shocked beyond words.

I tried to get her to _snap out of it_, but she wouldn't budge, so I went downstairs, deciding that if Edward's her brother, he should know how to wake her up.

"Hey Edward, I need some help with Alice. She kind of just froze up," I said as I entered the kitchen.

"Why'd she freeze?" He asked.

"I told her I don't have high heels."

"That's probably why. She thinks all girls should have high heels. I'll go un-freeze her," he said, with an amused expression on his face. He got up and went to my room, with m on his heels.

"Alice, Jasper threw away your new tights!" Edward said to Alice.

Alice's face turned from shock to anger. "He did _what_?"

"Nothing. I just needed to un-freeze you. We have to go. I'll call Carlisle and he'll pick us up," he said in a calmly amused voice. He took out his phone and went outside.

"Who's Carlisle?" I asked.

"Our foster dad, but we think of him as our dad," she said.

"You're foster children?"

"Yeah, I'll tell you the story. See, my mom died shortly after giving birth to me, and my dad had already died, so I was sent to an orphanage, where I grew up, till Carlisle adopted me at six. Edward was already there, but my age. His parents both died of some rare disease. Then came Rosalie, who's a year older than us, with her brother, Jasper, whose parents had abandoned them. Emmett came along a year later, when I was thirteen. We all get along pretty well, because we don't dwell on the past. When I was fifteen, I started going out with Jasper, and Rosalie with Emmett, and we've been together for like forever. I've wanted Edward to get a girlfriend for some time now, but he's never liked anyone, apart from you."

"Ok, well, um… I-I---" I started, but thankfully, Edward came in and said: "Carlisle here. Let's go."

I grabbed my bag, my iPod and followed him out. I locked the door and he led me to a shiny car. I got in, and Alice went in the passenger seat while Edward and I went in the backseat.

"Carlisle, this is Bella. She's new!" Alice said.

"Well, nice to meet you, Bella."

And he drove off, while I thought about what would happen tonight.


	3. Chapter 3

**Ok, you read the first chapter and told me what you thought. Now here's the second one. Do the same.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, Demi Lovato or an iPhone.**

**-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

**BPOV:**

Eventually, we made it to Alice and Edward's house. Let me just say, it was _huge_. Like, really big. Even the richest people in Arizona didn't have houses that big. It was beautiful, and it looked really bright, because it was painted an off white color. **(Author's Note: I don't want to elaborate much on the Cullen's house. If you want an exact description, read chapter 15 of Twilight.)** Edward opened the door and Alice and Carlisle went inside, but I stayed behind, just admiring the beautiful house, until Edward looked at me and said: "Aren't you coming inside?"

I blushed and carefully walked through the door, where I was met by an equally beautiful interior. **(Again, I'm **_**not**_** going to elaborate.)** Edward closed the door after he came in and led me toward a glass door. He opened it and we went inside, where Alice was talking to the blonde boy, and Carlisle was sitting on a chair watching a caramel-color haired woman set plates and glasses.

"Esme, this is Bella," Edward said.

The caramel-color haired woman looked up, glanced at me, smiled and walked over to me, extending her hand.

"Hi, I'm Esme. Nice to meet you." I shook her hand.

"Nice to meet you too," I said.

"Rose, Emmett! Get down here! Dinner's ready!" Alice suddenly yelled.

The blonde girl and the big dark-haired guy came in holding hands. The blonde girl looked at me, then glared. Wait, what? Why'd she glare? I don't even know her, for crying out loud, though I won't! But the big guy smiled at me.

"Guys, this is Bella. Bella, this is Rosalie," Alice pointed at the Barbie doll, "Emmett," the big guy, "Jasper," the blonde guy, "and our mom, Esme, and our dad, Carlisle."

"Hi," I said.

There was an awkward silence, in which the Barbie doll, (I refuse to call someone who glares at me for no good freaking reason by their name!), glared, (Duh!), Emmett looked uncomfortable, Alice beamed at me, Jasper stared at the door, as if longing to be anywhere but here, Carlisle and Esme shared a few furtive looks and Edward kept shooting glances at me when I looked somewhere else. That was a little random, because even though I can't _see_ him staring doesn't mean I can't _feel_ it.

"Well, let's go get our plates. Then we can sit down," Esme said to break the silence.

Barbie stopped glaring and walked off, Emmett at her heels, while Jasper went to the kitchen, then Esme came up to me.

"I hope you like Italian; it's what I made," she said.

"I _love_ homemade Italian food. It's _so_ much better than store-bought," I said.

"I'll get something for you," Edward said. He walked toward the kitchen and disappeared like Jasper, Emmett and Barbie. Esme smiled at me and Carlisle and her went too, leaving me confused.

Edward went to get my food? Why? Just being polite and nice to the guest? Or was is more? Whatever. I don't want a relationship. Gasp. Yeah, that's right you people! I don't want a boyfriend. You sissies! Stop with the stupid gasping! You're going to suffocate! Wait. There isn't anybody here with me! It's inside my head. Gosh, I'm so weird. I promised myself I wouldn't get a boyfriend, and even my own head was gasping at the thought of it. Only the stupid, freaking thought!

I snapped out of it as Barbie and Emmett came in the room. Emmett smiled but Barbie just walked toward a chair and while Emmett sat in the one next to her, she looks at me like she's daring me to sit close to her.

Alice had gone with Carlisle and Esme, and she came back carrying a plate with Jasper's arm around her waist. She sat two chairs away from Barbie, and Jasper sat next to Emmett. Next came Carlisle, who was balancing a plate of bread, his plate and some silverware in one hand. After him was Esme, who had her plate. Next came Edward. He had two plates in his hands, and he put them on the table, then motioned for me to sit.

My seat was in the middle of Alice and Edward. So far they were my favorite Cullen's, so I thought, why not? Everyone sat down, and started eating. Silently. I mean, I like the silence, because I'm not exactly what anyone whould call verbose. And I don't like expressing my feelings out loud.

Everyone ate, and then Esme ordered Barbie and Emmett to do the dishes while the rest of the family 'got to know me', which means: 'We know you're going to be around so we wanna know if you're dangerous or if you're a bad influence, but appart from that, we wanna know you'.

They led me to an expensive-looking living room, sat on the couches, yes _couches_, _several couches_, and I sat on another, smaller one, for two people. Edward sat next to me. They all looked at me.

"Bella, you're new, right? Where did you move from?" Jasper asked politley.

"I come from Arizona. Phoenix, Arizona." I tense as Esme frowns.

"You don't looked very tanned. How long did you live there?"

"Um, since I was seven, I think, so ten years. And I don't know why I don't get tanned. I love the sun, but when my mother asked the doctor about it, he said it must be something in my skin that doesn't absorb th sun or something... That's why I always stood out. I was surrounded by tanned girls in shorts and flip-flops, while I was pale, with Converse and jeans," I said.

"Why'd you move here, if you like the sun so much?" Alice asked.

"Because my mom remarried and her husband is a minor league baseball player, so he travels _a lot_, and my mom missed him. I decided I should just suck it up and let mom be happy, so I moved in with my father. I don't exactly love it here, but I can cope."

"Well, that's really... mature of you, Bella. Who's your father?" Carlisle asked.

"I'm Bella _Swan_. My father's Chief Swan." I made an emphasis on my last name.

Carlisle chuckled. "If you think this is intrusive, then you don't have to answer, but what were your grades in Phoenix?"

I laughed, glad to be asked something that wouldn't depress me. "Since I wasn't obesseded with tanning and wearing 'my pink shorts with the right tank top that goes with my sandals', I spent most of my time studying or reading. I've read a book six times. I get obsessive. I was usually either top of the class, or close. The only class I suck at is Math, and that's because I hate numbers and fractions and stuff."

"And, again, if you think it's intrusive, don't answer. How many boys did you date?"

I blushed. "It's not intrusive, but it's embarrassing. I haven't dated. At all."

I looked from one shocked face to the next.

"Well, that's odd. I would've thought a beautiful, smart girl like you would've had all the boys after her," Alice said.

"In my defense, I just kept to myself. I was and am always either listening to music, writing music or reading the newest addition to my bookshelf. I even read a book in twenty-two hours, and then I started it all over again. I was never a very attractive girl. In fact, all everyone knew about me was that I loved music and fiction books and that I was smart and that I could write music and sing it. I was too shy to talk to someone, so it's not really anyone's fault." Cue a new flush, combining with the last one.

"Well Carlisle, can she stay over?" Alice asked impatiently.

"Sure. But don't stay _too_ late. Just because we're gone for the weekend doesn't mean there's no authority, right Jasper?" He looked pointedly at Jasper.

He nodded.

I looked at my watch. "Shoot! I gotta get home!" I stood up.

"I'll drive you," Edward said quietly.

I looked at him. "Thanks."

We walked outside, where it was dark and drizzling. He walked me over to a polished silver Volvo, then opened it and opened my door for me. "Thanks," I muttered. I fumbled with my seat belt, then, when he got in, he put on his seat belt and turned on the car and the CD player, where I recognized the tune.

"Demi Lovato?" I asked as he drives away, toward the general direction of the highway.

"Yeah, why?"

"I didn't think you were into her. I mean, you have this... cool appearence, like you're over Disney stars," I said. Then I blushed.

He smiled. "You have the appearence of someone who's been through a lot in life. Appearences are what they are, but a sweet ballerina can pass off as a Goth girl, just by acting and wearing black and stuff. And just so you know, I didn't know I looked cool, so thanks. You just made my day."

I smiled. "Thanks. You know, me, of all people, should know that an act is what it is, but deep down, even the meanest popular girl can be nice. When I went to the school in Phoenix, this girl, Kim, should me around. She complemented me on my jeans and blue tank top with Converse, even though she was wearing a denim mini, heels and a strap top. She sat with the obviously 'cool' kids, and she was mean to this nerdy guy. But she was nice to me because she was alone."

There was a silence, in which I looked for my iPod in my bag.

"What are you thinking?" Edward asked suddenly.

"Um, just looking for my iPod. I need a good dose of Taylor Swift right now. See, music is my escape, appart from books. I don't mind being alone. If I have my favorite music and a good book, I'm completely fine."

"Give it to me, I'll put it in the stereo." I gave him my iPod and he plugged it in, then I looked for _Invisible_.

"_Invisible_? That's how you feel? Like the guy you like likes someone else?" He asked curiously.

"No. I've never really liked anyone. Any boy, anyway. I think it's a very inspirational song, and I like the rythm and melody. If you want I'll change it," I said.

"No, that's ok."

He drove in silence, until he stopped.

"Here you are. I'll see you tomorrow. Bye Bella," he said.

"Goodnight." I got out of the car and walked inside my house.

..........

I went to school the next day, and it was pretty much the same, except that everytime I saw Alice, Jasper or Emmett, they'd smile at me. When I saw Barbie, I waved, but she merely scowled and walked away. I saw Edward, and I waved and smiled, but he just tensed, looked nervous, smiled and walked away.

At Lunch, Alice told me to sit with them, and, as you can probably guess, the only seat available was next to... (You know who it is, right?) Edward. (DUH! That _always_ happens!) I sat there and said hello, then focused on eating my pizza while reading Ever get drunk so she's not phychic while Edward told me quietly to be careful during the sleepover, because Alice was known to go overboard. **(Author's Note: Reference to the book _Evermore_. It's really good.**)

Then Edward walked me to Biology and we sat there, not talking, because I was too disgusted with Ever to really talk about anything else. I'd warned them at the table.

After Biology, I went to Gym, where I tripped and got taken to the nurse's office by a tall, light-brown haired girl. She helped me and then said: "Hi, I'm Angela. You're Bella, right?"

I responded with a positive, then she left.

I thought about what would happen at Alice's sleepover, hoping it wasn't something too extreme, because according to what Edward had told me during Lunch, I was in for torture, even if Alice said it would be fun.


	4. Chapter 4

**Ok, you read the first chapter and told me what you thought. Now here's the fourth one. Do the same.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, Demi Lovato, Taylor Swift or an iPhone.**

**-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

**BPOV:**

After school, I went home with Alice, so she'd help me pack for tomorrow's sleepover. Edward tagged along.

Alice scowled but made no more comment on my clothes and shoes. In the end, we packed skinny jeans, a blue top, some sweats, some heels that she'd bought, guessing my size, a swim suit, black nail polish, eyeliner, and a bunch of stuff I didn't even know I had. She did most of the packing while I just watched. Edward was there most of the time, watching me (I know as a fact he was watching me!) read.

After Alice finished, I offered to make dinner and they stayed, Alice watching _Sonny With A Chance_, while Edward did some homework. I made some hamburgers, and when I asked if they wanted bacon, I wasn't surprised that Alice said no. I myself had bacon, and lettuce, pickles and tomato for that matter.

Alice and Edward ate, and halfway through the meal, Charlie arrived.

"Hmm, smells amazing. Did you make that, Bells?" He asked.

"Yes. I don't have mom's… abilities in the kitchen, Dad, I'm safe. Do you want bacon on yours?" I said.

"Yeah, thanks." He sat down and ate.

When Edward and Alice were done, I said: "Dad, do you mind if I stay over at Alice's tomorrow?"

"Yeah, I was going fishing on Saturday with Billy, so sure, go."

Yes!

"Thanks. I'll leave you some dinner for tomorrow."

"Bella, I fed myself for ten years before you came here; I can handle a day," he said defensively.

"I don't know how he survived," I whispered to Alice. "Ok," I said to Charlie.

After dinner, Edward and Alice said goodbye and left, then I cleaned up, took a shower and just as I was about to turn on the TV, Charlie comes in, sits beside me and looks at me, with an uncomfortable expression on his face.

"Bella, I noticed Edward Cullen looking at you a lot, is there something going on I should know about?" He said.

"No, dad. We're just friends, plus, I just met him. I don't go out with some guy I don't know! You gotta give me more credit than that!"

"Ok Bella. You should go to bed, you can watch for half an hour, then go to bed."

"Game on?"

"Yes."

"It's ok, I've watched this a million times. Goodnight."

I went to my room and got out _Evermore_. I was stuck because I was mad at Ever for getting drunk, but I wanted to know if Damen came back. So I read. I read until the thing with Ava and the shield, then I stopped and went to bed.

The next day, I was so shocked to find my room filled with golden light, I kept pinching myself.

I wore jeans, Converse, but instead of a sweater, I put on this V-nack deep-blue blouse that I wore on the dead of winter back in Arizona. I put on some eyeliner and went to eat, grabbing my jacket in case the rain decided to come down. I got some cereal, and when I was done, I got the bag for the sleepover and drove to school. I parked and, after putting tonight's bag inside and locking the truck, I walked toward the boring lecture that would be English.

After ever boring class, during Spanish, the teacher announced an exam. Good, at least something to break the monotony. I walked to lunch and sat at my spot, then noticed something.

"Hey Alice, where are Emmett and Jasper?" I asked.

Barbie glared. Edward looked at me and shrugged, but Alice said: "They're off hiking. They love hiking on sunny days."

I noticed that Alice was wearing knee-length jeans, a pink tank top and blue sandals. Barbie was wearing a denim skirt and a strap shirt, with white heels.

"Oh."

After five minutes, since Alice looked like she was going to explode with excitment, I asked: "What up, Alice? You look like you're going to blow up."

"I'm just so excited to have you over! We are going to have _so_ much fun!"

Just then, Barbie said: "I'm leaving. I feel sick, so I won't be able to party tonight. Goodbye."

She stood up and left. I looked at Edward for an answer. He shrugged.

I took off toward the rest of my classes and when it was time to leave, and the girl from Gym that helped me yesterday said hi and smiled, I was about to walk toward Alice, when a guy with blonde hair gelled in orderly spikes and blue eyes walks up to me.

"Hi, I'm Mike. I was wondering if you wanted to go out tonight. We could go to the movies or something," he said.

A guy, asking _me _out? Forks is definitely the place that turns my world upside down.

"Um, sorry. No. I have plans." I looked purposely at Alice, hoping he'd take the hint and leave. But of course, he doesn't.

"Saturday?"

"Nope."

"Any other day?" Man, being persistent is the worst thing he _ever_ did.

"No. I don't date." I walked toward Alice. Edward was standing beside her, looking murderous.

"What---" Alice started, but I shook my head.

We walked to my car.

"Alice, I should probably leave my car home."

"Edward will follow us. We'll drop it off," she said.

We walked toward our cars and Alice got on mine while Edward got on his Volvo. I felt I small disappointment when I realized Edward wasn't going to ride with me. Wait, _what_? This was exactly the kind of thing I wanted to avoid. Oh, whatever. I have to let myself feel what I wanna feel. It was probably just that I was disappointed my _friend_ wasn't riding with me.

As I got on the highway, I seized my chance to ask Alice a question that's been burning inside me ever since I met Barbie.

"Alice, why is Barb--- Rosalie always in such a crappy mood and glaring at me all the time?"

"She's just jealous," Alice answered simply.

"Rosalie? Jealous of _me_? Why?" I simply couldn't believe it here! Guys asking me out. Having awesome friends. Barbie dolls being jealous of me.

"Because you're new. I like you and the whole family likes you. She used to be the only one I did sleepovers with and the only one that I ever took shopping, because since I'm adopted, I don't really know many girls for a long span of time. But I've known her for a really long time, and she's mad at me for liking you. She's mad at Jasper, Emmett and Edward for liking and approving of you and she's mad at Carlisle and Esme for not finding something bad you did. She expected you to be some sort of criminal or something, sent to live with the town's Chief of Police so you learn to live with the rules. She's also mad that Edward noticed you.

"See, according to her, in Forks High, there are a few pretty girls, but no one is as beautiful as her. And when she was little, like since she was twelve, she's always been wanted by all the boys. When she moved in with Jasper, Emmett wasn't here yet. She was insulted that Edward didn't fall for her. I've been worried. I mean, what kind of teenager doesn't get a crush?" She laughed, thinking that it was impossible.

"I've lived my life without a boyfriend, or even a crush, for that matter." Alice gasped.

"Oh, Bella, I'm sorry. I---" she started in a little voice.

"It's ok. Really."

We arrived at my house, where I just parked in my usual spot and climbed out, carrying the sleepover bag with me. Alice suggested I sat in front, so I did.

Edward put Taylor Swift on, much to my surprise.

"You like her?"

"Yeah, you like her too, right?" He asked.

"Um, yes... Can you put _The Outside_?" I said, feeling happy that he liked the same music as me.

He took out an iPod and looked for the song, then the music started.

"Thanks."

The ride was silent, if anything can even _be_ silent when Alice is talking non-stop about the most trivial thing ever: What color she should paint her toenails. She was between bubble-gum pink and neon green with bright yellow.

Finally, we got to the big white house and Alice ran in, carrying my bag, while Edward and I took off our seat belts.

"Is she always like this?" I asked him, half amused half serious.

"Yes, I personally think she needs a medication, but Carlisle won't believe me. He says she just eats too much sugar," he said, then he laughed.

I laughed too, then I followed him inside, careful not to trip over the stone path that was near the door. I didn't remember the stone path, but then again, last time, we came in through the door, and he left the car in the driveway, this time, they put it in the garage.

Edward was leading, but he came behind me for no apparent reason, so I kept walking, because I could see a door. I guess I walked too 'fast', because the second my eyes left the trail was the second my feet found something to trip over.

I fell backward, into Edward's arms.

"Sorry! I'm---" I looked up. Edward's face was the most confusing thing ever. His eyes betrayed love, but his face was concerned. I stood up, embarrassed.

"Sorry," I mumbled for what I hoped would be the last time, and kept on walking. I reached the door and went inside, hoping to go unnoticed, but, since I'm me, I sure as hell didn't.

I walked in and Barbie was there, making a salad. She looked up, then glared.

"Have you seen Alice?" I said in what I hope was a confident voice, but I know she saw right through it.

"She's in her room," she said icily.

Just as I was about to ask where that was, Edward came in and put a hand on my back, then said: "I'll take you."

He led me out of the room, his hand still on my back. (Yay!)

_Wait, __yay? What do you mean by 'yay'? _a voice in my head said. The reasonable voice. _You cannot be falling for him! You just can't! It's not a possibility! _

_But what if she wants to, eh?_ the voice that said what I wanted said. _What if she likes this boy and wants to be with him? Why can't that happen? What's the problem with her being happy?_

_HELLO! I'm the one who decides! I side with both of you! I really am starting to like Edward, but I can't be with him!_ said the voice that made sense.

The voices shut up, for which I was grateful for, but while my head was arguing with itself, Edward had gone up a few set of stairs and through some rooms that I'd failed to memorize. He was currently in front of a closed door, on which he had just knocked. He removed his hand from my back and smiled at me, but the moment his hand had left my back, I felt incomplete. I tried smiling back, but the sadness that took me was too much. I liked him, but I couldn't be with him. Not now.

Alice opened the door and I instantly tried to make myself look happy, or at least not sad. She narrowed her eyes and pulled me to her room, while Edward said: "I rescued her from the pink beach. She was freezing over." He smirked and walked away.

"What was that all about?" I asked.

"Edward and I are pretty much the only ones that have noticed Rosalie's attitude. So we made secret code names and stuff to talk when she's around without her knowing. It got really funny when we were deciding to give her a name. It's 'pink beach' because she's Rosa-lie, 'rosa' is pink in Spanish, and she's been really bitchy lately 'cause everyone likes you, so she's 'the pink beach'. When Edward said she was freezing over, he meant that she was being 'icy', like mean," she explained. "Now, let's get your stuff and get ready. Pink Beach was supposed to join us, but she doesn't want to anymore, so we have more space."

She unpacked my stuff and set it down, while I looked at her music and her HUGE closet. Like, Miley Cyrus-sized. After she put down my stuff, she looked in her drawers and shelves, until she got a yellow iPod nano. She put it on some speakers and pressed play and _Party In The U.S.A._ by Miley Cyrus started. (Think of the devil and the devil shall appear, or at least it's music shall be played.)

Alice said: "After we order some pizza, we're going to take some showers and change into our PJ's, then we'll do makeovers and eat ice cream sundaes, then gossip and watch TV and listen to music. Then we'll do a sing-and-dance-off and then, depending on how late it is, we'll either watch some TV or go to bed. Tomorrow, we'll have breakfast, get ready and go shopping, and have lunch in Port Angeles. Later, we'll come back, get ready and we'll take you home. And I'll call you!"

"Um, ok," I said.

She danced around, and when the song ended, she looked at me and said: "Let the partying begin."


	5. Chapter 5

**Hi guys, sorry I've been gone for so long. I just finished my first story and I've kind of lost interest writing this one. You tell me if you want this to continue. I've also been busy because my head is so freakin' full of other ideas it's hard to concentrate on what I'm doing. I usually never put this before the chapter, but this had to be said. I assume you forgot Alice's plans, (don't feel bad, I did too!), so they'll be here before the chapter. I intended to make it the whole sleepover, but I think it got too long. I think it's the longest I've ever written. I'm sorry if you don't have time to read a 6,200 word chapter, but I couldn't help it! Sorry!  
**

**Anyway, I don't own the songs I mention, the right to use Internet (I'm grounded, I'm just very sneaky), or an iPhone.**

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_**Alice's plans: "After we order some pizza, we're going to take showers and change into sweats, then we'll do make-overs and change and eat ice cream sundaes, then gossip and listen to music. Then we'll do a sing-and-dance off and then, depending on how late it is, we'll watch some TV or go to bed. Tomorrow, we'll have breakfast, get ready, and go shopping and have lunch in Port Angeles. Later, we'll come back, get ready and take you home. And I'll call you!"**_

**BPOV:**

Alice skipped downstairs and as I was walking down them, looking down, I bumped into someone and stumbled.

"Sorry! I wasn---" I started, but the person cut me off.

"It's ok, Bella, really," Edward's voice said. He steadied me by putting his arms around my waist. Where his arms touched my bare skin, it felt like he shot electricity through my body.

It was a very pleasant sensation.

When he'd steadied me, he'd removed his arms hesitantly, almost reluctantly, and the instant he did so, a lingering sensation replaced the shock. When it disappeared, I was left with a longing… a longing for more… As though without him I would never be complete.

Wait! What am I _thinking_? Didn't the annoying voices _just_ agree I couldn't be with him?

I stepped back. "Thanks."

I kept walking carefully until I reached Alice. She was talking on the phone looking irritable.

"No, no! I said I wanted--- Hold on." She covered the phone with her hand and turned to me. "What type do you want?"

"Pepperoni," me and a deep, musical voice said together.

I looked around. Edward had come up behind me. Alice turned back to the phone.

"Ok, it'll be a large pepperoni pizza and a medium cheese…… No!...... I don't want to go out with you!…… I don't know you!...... I _have_ a boyfriend!...... You know what?!? I'm calling another place! Cancel my order!...... I don't care if you already started! Bye! Get a life and stop hitting on girls on the freaking phone when all they want is to pig out on pizza! Bye!" Alice slammed the phone down, looking livid.

"Maybe I should call…." Said Edward.

"Yeah, call that Domino's Pizza down town. I like their pizza better, anyway," Alice muttered. She handed him the phone and he dialed.

"Hello, can I have a large pepperoni and a medium cheese pizza?...... No, I'm Eric Masen…….. It's ok. Thank you. Um, just go down the freeway, up on a path and just drive down the path until you see the bridge over the river. Then there's a drive and you follow that and get here……. It's inside a forest, yes……. We like secluded areas……. Thank you. Goodnight." He hung up.

"Why'd you say you were Eric Masen?" I asked. A friend could ask that, right?

He just shrugged. "It was that girl, Jessica, from school. I'd forgotten why we didn't call there anymore… Anyway, she keeps trying to ask me out, and she can't take a simple 'No'. I said I was Eric Masen because Masen was my real last name and I changed it and I found out after my father died that he'd wanted to call me Eric."

"Oh." Alice snapped me out of my thoughts, all of which included a certain bronze haired boy who was staring at me intently, as though trying to communicate something with his eyes.

"C'mon Bella! I'll show you to the bathroom. You'll put on some sweats before we do the make-overs!" She grabbed my arm and dragged me to her room, where she got me my ivory sweat pants and hoodie, my underwear and a deep-blue tank top. Then she dragged me toward a door, which she opened and pulled me into, saying: "Call me when you're done! Wash your hair; I bought the strawberry shampoo you told me you used!"

She closed the door and I set my things on the sink and looked around. The walls were painted a pale gold and baby-blue. The sink was clear and spotless, as were the cabinets and the mirror. I took the shower and washed my hair as Alice said, then took a gold-colored towel and changed into my sweats. I grabbed my stuff, opened the door and called out: "Alice, I'm done!"

She skipped toward me and pulled me into her room.

"Ok, Bellsy! I'm gonna give you a make-over and do your hair! Then I'm going to dress you up. Now sit!" She sat me down in a chair and looked at me, then took out a professional-looking blow drier and curling iron, then got me my iPod. "Blast your favorites 'cause this could take a while. And close your eyes; I don't want you to see my masterpiece until it's done."

I made a playlist of my favorite songs, put it on play and closed my eyes.

Alice dried my hair nicely, but complained several times about how thick my hair is and how long it would take. But despite her comments, she was done in about twenty minutes or so. Then she straightened my too-long bangs and pulled them aside so they completely hid my left eye. She curled my hair, and as she was pulling my bangs back, she twisted her wrist and stopped abruptly.

"I hadn't realized it was so late! I have to go take a shower! We're running on a schedule." She put my bangs back in place and I opened my eyes. "I'm gonna take a shower and you go downstairs and do something. I'll call you up when I'm done!" She took her sweats (bubble-gum pink, of course) and her white tank top, gave my iPod a reproaching look and left.

I sighed, pocketed my iPod and headed downstairs, hoping I wouldn't get lost. I took a few wrong turns, but finally I found the door that lead to the expensive-looking living room that Edward was in. I knew that by 'do something', Alice meant 'go hang out with Edward'. He was sitting in one of the couches, reading _Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows_; he was halfway done already.

"Hey," I said.

"Oh, hi." He put a bookmark in the book and closed it, then looked at me. "Did you want something? Maybe some water or...."

I was caught off guard by his question, but my voice said: "Some water would be nice." I heard it as if it was spoken from someone else's voice, because I didn't think I'd say that.

We walked to the kitchen, and the whole time, those stupid, frickin' butterflies were causing havoc in my stomach. I pathetically tried to ignore them, hoping they'd go away when they say they weren't wanted, but they didn't. (Is that really a surprise?) As Edward got two glasses, looking beautiful, (Stop thinking this way! You can't be with him!), I drew a chair and sat down.

"What do you want? We have Coke, Root Beer, Juice, water..." He said.

"Just some water." Simple. That's the story of my life. Edward filled up the glasses and gave me one. "Thanks."

I drank almost all the water and set it down, hoping the silence will last.

"So, what other music do you like?" Edward asked casually. Of course. No such silence could last. At least he's talking to me.

"Um, you know I like Taylor Swift and Demi Lovato, but I also kinda like the Jonas Brothers and Paramore and KSM. I have a few songs from Emily Osment and Linkin Park, but my favorite is Taylor Swift," I said. God, I was babbling. I need to learn to shut up in front of a crush.

Wait, excuse? _Crush_?

"Um, those are nice, but I'm more into Classical music, and Debussy is my favorite," he said with an uncomfortable look on his face.

"Oh My God! I thought _nobody_ liked Classical music! I love Debussy! Claire De Lune is my favorite." Calm down...

"So, what type of movies do you like?" He asked, full on with the 20 Questions now. The object thought of? Me.

"I pretty much like all types of movies except horror, tragedy, mystery and that kind. But there are also some movies that people want to see with me and I get this feeling that I'm not gonna like it and then we go watch it and everybody's like: 'I didn't like it, it was too intense.' and I'm like: 'I told you so!'. Actually, there was this one time where I was babysitting my 10-year-old neighbor and his mom gave me some money to take him to the movies. He wanted to watch _Click_ with Adam Sandler, I had that feeling, but I payed and we watched it anyway. He cried in the movie and said he would never watch it again. So, I'm weird like that," I said. I shut myself up, knowing I must be boring him.

But he looked really interested. Creepy. I was only talking about my babysitting experience.

"Favorite book?" He asked.

"_Wuthering Heights_ by Emily Bronte," I said. **(Author's Note: Sorry if I got the name wrong. I wanted to keep some of the real Bella alive here, so she's into a little bit of Linkin Park and her favorite book is _Wuthering Heights _like she says in Eclipse. Or somewhere.)**

"I thought that book was full of tragedy and evil. Like the characters don't have any redeeming qualities. I mean, he's evil and she's selfish, right? At least in Harry Potter, Snape changes out of love for Lily. Why's it your favorite?" He asked, skeptical.

"I don't know. I think it's that their love _is_ their only redeeming quality. Nothing can keep them apart. Not his evil, or her selfishness, or even death, in the end. I don't know," I said. **( Author's Note: Sounds like the one in Eclipse? Like almost exactly what Bella said. Well, I read it yesterday** **and I thought it'd be nice to have it there.)**

He was walking closer to me. He was inches from me now.

"Favorite song......?" He asked, suddenly intense. He was getting closer... closer... closer... He was ducking his head... his face was inches from mine...

I was frozen in place, and the reasonable part of my brain told me to say _That's What You Get_ by Paramore, but my mind barely acknowledged it. I was too concentrated on his lips, which were inches from mine. Closer...

And then he was kissing me and I forgot all about why I couldn't allow myself to date him and just kissed him back. God, it felt so good. Just to let myself feel what I wanted to feel. And what Edward felt.

We broke apart too soon, but as soon as we did, I grabbed my glass of water and drained the last few remaining drops for something to do. I was fully aware that that had been my first kiss. I was also fully aware that as I realized that, I blushed. I smiled, too, but the blush mattered more, because if someone came in the room and noticed me smiling, it could just be a joke Edward (butterflies in my stomach) just told, but my blush made it obvious _something_ had happened.

Thankfully, after my blush died down, no one had came inside. But I still didn't dare look at Edward. I took out my iPod and looked for a happy song. _I Want You To Want Me_ by KSM fitted. (Their remake of the song.) I put it on and it matched my mood.

"Bella! Pick a few songs from our storage for the kareoke! Go!" Alice called from upstairs. I groaned.

"You want me to help you?" Edward asked me. I looked up. He smiled at me.

"Sure." I followed him into a dark room, where he flipped on the too-bright lights and motioned to where their collection of music was.

They had everything Taylor Swift and Miley Cyrus. Demi Lovato and Jonas Brothers. Michael Jackson. Heck, I bet they even had Kanye West, wrong as it seemed. They had everything.

"Wow, um, what do I need?" I asked Edward.

"Just two or three songs you want to sing tonight..."

"Um, do you have _All The Way Up _by Emily Osment?" I asked.

"Probably... When did that come out?" Edward asked in his angel's voice.

"Um, by the end of August, I think," I responded, mentally cursing the stupid butterflies that caused havoc in my stomach again.

"Lemme see..." He rummaged in the piles until he saw a small sheaf of paper and a chip. "Here." He handed it to me.

I looked at him questioningly. "What am I supposed to do with _this_?"

"It's the way you make the kareoke list. You press the chips for the songs you want in the little box over there, then it reads it and gives you the lyrics, plus the video or the artist performing it or something. What other songs do you want?" He said.

"Um, _Stay Beautiful_ by Taylor Swift and, uh... er... um, _Distracted_ by KSM?" I'd thought long and hard about how I felt, and Edward _was _beautiful.

"Ok....... Yeah, we have that. Ok, I'll let Alice do the rest. Let me get mine now..." He looked for his, found one and put it in the stack where he put mine.

"Um, I'm gonna go get my iPod," I said. I headed in the direction I had come as Edward caught my arm. I ignored the way my heart fluttered as he said: "Don't you have your iPod here?"

The honest answer would be: Yes, I do have my iPod, but I need to be away from your gaze to think through some things. The answer I provided was: "Yeah, but I have to charge it. Maybe I'll bring my book."

I walked up the stairs as soon as Edward released me, trying to ignore the lingering sensation, then the longing I felt earlier. When I finally, _finally_, found Alice's room, I disposed of any opposing evidence (my iPod Touch, a gift from last Christmas) and grabbed my book, eager to finish it so that when the next _Septimus Heap_ book got home from the mail I would be ready to read it. I was reluctantly walking, almost outside Alice's room, thinking of the Silent Reading Time with Edward (AKA Awkward Time with Edward) I'd have to endure when I arrived down there, but Alice saved me. She came out of a room and dragged me back inside her room.

She was wearing bubble-gum pink sweats with a white tank top underneath and instead of her usual spiky 'do with bangs just down, her hair was completely and impeccably straight and her bangs were brushed to the side in a natural-looking way. She sat me down in a chair in front of her vast vanity and said: "I'm going to do your make up and get you a nice outfit for the sing-and-dance-off. This is a nice time to think, or to listen to music... Either way, close your eyes; I don't want you to see my master piece and I don't want you to jinx it."

I nodded and closed my eyes; I needed time to think. As she walked around me, her footsteps low and silent, murmuring and muttering things like: "No base, she's got clear, pallid skin...... Blue is too show-offy for her..... A bronze playing with gold would make her eyes pop...... Soft liner and waterproof mascara just in case... Soft gloss...." I thought of Edward.

He seemed to really like me. No one had ever acted that way around me. I had never felt this way before, so it was hard to compare anything. Very hard. Possibly impossible. I wanted to believe he liked me, and the kiss downstairs was very nice proof of that, but what if he was just making fun of me? Was it really that obvious I liked him? No. I didn't think so. But what did I know? Anyway, even if people like him don't like people like me, I was changing. I was letting loose and becoming the person I wanted to be, not the person I wanted everyone to know me as. It was as simple as that.

Alice started brushing something on my eyelids and then she took a brush that tickled as she passed a little powder on my cheeks, then rubbed it around with her hand.

I knew that my attraction to Edward was more than just plain _liking_ him. At least, I knew it would turn into something more, and it couldn't. When I'd been kissing him, it had felt like all my problems had went away, but now, without his presence, they all came back.

College was on the way and finishing high school with good marks was essential, and a distraction was not. I couldn't be with Edward because I needed to focus on more important things, according to everything I had learned from others. When I was younger, I learned, while locked in a bathroom stall in school for fear of being discovered by the girls sobbing their guts out outside the stall. They were always sobbing about how their boyfriends had broken their hearts and they'd failed and gotten behind in everything for them. It was sad, and I didn't want that to happen. I couldn't fall too deep because then it would hurt too much when Edward said goodbye, because even if we were together, eventually he would. And besides, what if he didn't catch me? What if he didn't receive my love? I would not be able to go on, and that was what I feared. It was a very hard line to walk and according to Alice, since he liked me, I would not only be hurting myself by not letting myself feel what I want to feel, I would also be hurting him by rejecting him. It was the life I had chosen before, when no one wanted me, so it had not hurt back then, but now it changed, and I wasn't sure I would be able to live a life alone anymore. I didn't want to.

Alice had passed liner on my eyes and gloss on my lips while I thought torturing thoughts, and now, she tapped my shoulder and said: "Bellsy, I'm done! Open your eyes!"

I did as she asked--- and what I saw confused me. It was another girl, (I knew it was another girl because I could never be so beautiful.), with my color eyes and my color hair. Her eyes popped by the bronze eyeshadow and eyeliner applied on her eyes. Her pale skin, so much like mine, glowed thanks to the soft pink lip gloss on her lips and her cheeks gave off a rosy glow. She was quite beautiful. I knew it was me, because I was the one sitting on the chair. This was someone different than plain Bella. This was---

"Isabella..." My head whipped in the sound of Edward's voice. Alice had left the door open, and I assumed he'd worried why I took so long and come upstairs. He'd seen me this way, and he seemed...... awed? Now, it went deeper than that. It seemed like a blind man seeing the sun very first time. It embarrassed me. I looked away, but I felt his eyes on my face.

"Edward, Bella here has to finish getting ready, you don't mind waiting downstairs for a little while, right?" Alice spoke in a cautious tone I didn't think she was capable of. "And you could take a shower, too."

He nodded and walked away, his eyes still on me.

"O-kay... Now why don't I do my make up and we get something to wear?" I nodded. "Do you mind? I need to sit."

I blushed and she chuckled. I got up and retrieved _Evermore_ and sat on the bed. I read way, way too much, too fast, but I didn't care; I'd love any excuse to finish that book, I didn't exactly enjoy it that much. Alice finished as I read Damen's last words: "Always have. Always will." She looked stunning. Her eyes glowed and sparkled with the aqua colors she'd put on and her natural-looking lipgloss and eyeliner made her look peaceful... how deceiving... Alice was a peaceful person in the sense that she didn't fight or yell, but she was too hyper to be considered peaceful on most people's standards. **(Author's Note: I'm laughing on the inside while writing the part about Alice's "peacefulness". Everyone knows I'm right, though, right? In how Alice is peaceful? Or am I insane for thinking that?)**

"Alice, you look fantastic!" I told her. She squealed and smiled at me.

"Now let's do our clothes!" She walked toward a door and opened it and disappeared inside. She came back holding millions of clothing items and shoes in her arms. She looked too small to carry it all, but somehow she managed.

She started discarding a few things and in the end, it was down to two things for me to wear: white skinny jeans with a loose deep blue silk shirt and blue heels to match or a strapless deep blue dress with a white ribbon beneath the bust, white leggings and deep blue flats, but when I complained it would be too cold, she looked for a white long sleeve cardigan with a black button on the left side, and it was short and really cute. She kept asking me for my opinion and I always said each outfit had drawbacks. The dress was a dress but white jeans made me paranoid and heels made me clumsier than usual. I was glad she took pity on my poor balance and chose the dress. She chose a denim mini skirt with soft yellow leggings underneath and a soft yellow blouse with a round neckline and black flats.

We changed and walked downstairs, where Alice took me to the TV room, where Edward was watching the news and started setting up. I caught the listing of songs:

_Party In The U.S.A._ by Miley Cyrus  
_All The Way Up_ by Emily Osment  
_Beautiful Soul_ by Jesse McCartney  
_Distracted_ by KSM  
_Leave It All To Me_ by Miranda Cosgrove feat. Drake Bell  
_Stay Beautiful_ by Taylor Swift

Alice motioned for her audience to sit as she changed the news to the program or whatever it was. We were met by Miley Cyrus getting ready to perform the song. I could hear the guitar. The first lines of the song appeared in the bottom of the screen. Alice began to sing, but I knew she'd probably change a few lines:

_I hopped off the at Port Angeles  
With a dream and my cardigan  
Welcome to the land of fame excess (Whoa!)  
Am I gonna fit in?_

_Jumped in the cab  
Here I am for the first time  
Look the my right and I see the Forks High sign_

_This is all so crazy  
Everybody seems so famous_

_My tummy's turning and I'm feeling kinda homesick  
Too much pressure and I'm nervous  
That's when the taxi man turned on the radio  
And a Miley song was on  
And a Miley song was om  
And a Miley song was on_

_So I put my hands up  
They're playing my song  
The butterflies fly away  
Nodding my head like: 'Yeah'  
Moving my hips like: 'Yeah'  
Got my hands up  
They're playing my song  
You know I'm gonna be ok  
Yeah, it's a party in the U.S.A.  
Yeah, it's a party in the U.S.A._

_Get to the dance in my taxi cab  
Everybody's looking at me now  
Like: 'Who's that chick that's rocking kicks?  
She's gotta be from outta town.'_

_So hard with my girls not around me  
It's definitively not a Patch High party  
'Cause all see are stiletto's  
I guess I never got the memo_

_My tummy's turning and I'm feeling kinda homesick  
Too much pressure and I'm nervous  
That's when the DJ got my favorite tune  
And a Taylor song was on  
And a Taylor song was on  
And a Taylor song was on_

_So I put my hands up  
They're playing my song  
The butterflies fly away  
Nodding my head like: 'Yeah'  
Moving my hips like: 'Yeah'  
Got my hands up  
They're playing my song  
You know I'm gonna be ok  
Yeah, it's a party in the U.S.A.  
Yeah, it's a party in the U.S.A._

_Feel like hopping on a flight  
Back to my hometown tonight  
Something stops me every time  
The DJ plays my song  
And I feel alright _

_So I put my hands up  
They're playing my song  
The butterflies fly away  
Nodding my head like: 'Yeah' (Yeah)  
Moving my hips like: 'Ooh yeah'  
Got my hands up  
They're playing my song__ You know I'm gonna be ok (Gonna be ok)  
_

_So I put my hands up  
They're playing my song  
The butterflies fly away  
Nodding my head like: 'Yeah'  
Moving my hips like: 'Yeah'  
Got my hands up  
They're playing my song  
You know I'm gonna be ok  
Yeah, it's a party in the U.S.A.  
Yeah, it's a party in the U.S.A._

Alice bowed while Edward and I clapped. Then she smiled at me and said: "It's your turn now. You can hit play when you're ready." She sat down as I stood up. Here goes nothing...

**(Author's Note: Thought the chapter was gonna end there, did ya? Well, that's your reward for being patient: An extremely long chapter. I mean, this is probably the longest chapter I've written in my life. Including schoolwork. P.S. I don't have my iPod with me now and I don't wanna have to write the lines for _All The Way Up_, so if you want to hear it, can you look it up on youtube? The video is awesome!)**

I grabbed the mic and pressed play. The drums beat hard and loud as the video started playing. I sang:

_I like to bite my nails and play the air guitar  
I like to keep my suitcase packed 'cause I'm going far  
I think you're nice, but I don't wanna waste my time......_

And I found confidence as I realized the words I sang were as true as they could be. This song is about being free and being yourself and liking someone who may or may not accept you that way. That was almost how I felt. The words were true enough. I finished the song and bowed as Edward and Alice clapped and then sat when Edward got up after a little nudge from Alice. He sang _Beautiful Soul_ beautifully. There was no other word. His voice was soft, but sure and he looked at me all the time. Actually, the only time he took his eyes off me was to bow. Then I sang _Distracted_, Alice sang _Leave It All To Me_, and I finished up with _Stay Beautiful_, where I actually danced a little. Alice had danced a lot when she did her songs, and she'd encouraged me to do so.

Then the pizza arrived and Alice and I changed back into our sweats and ate with Edward, while Barbie got a salad and a plate of fish and ate in her room. Alice had rolled her eyes when Barbie had asked why we didn't eat in the table. Barbie found this so offensive she slammed the fridge door with enough force that I think the eggs cracked and all the contents from the shelves spilled over and walked off. I giggled internally until Alice burst out laughing and then I laughed, too.

Then we made ice cream sundaes, mine with Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream, chocolate shavings and chocolate syrup. (Edward said: "Bella, you really do love your chocolate.") Then Alice decided to get her laptop and we went on a website with celebrity gossip and put the silliest and funniest of comments on stars like Nikki Reed, Miley Cyrus, Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Britney Spears, ect. We laughed so hard at the comments people put on ours that I was rolling on the floor laughing. Then Alice commented on someone saying: 'we're rofling at your comments. no joke. i think bella peed her pants.' I hit her arm playfully.

Then Alice said she had to go dig in her closet for her speakers so we could listen to music. Very well acted, indeed. I knew she just wanted Edward and me to be together so something happened. The way I'd been glancing at him more than courtesy demanded made it obvious. I knew Alice was going to make me confess, even if she already knew it, so I was already prepared. What I wasn't prepared for was this:

Edward got closer to me until we were only inches from each other and looked into my eyes intently.

"Bella, you know I really like you, right?" I was very caught off guard by his question, so I didn't have an answer ready, but he continued anyways. "I just want you to know I've never felt this way before. Please give me a chance. I don't want to ruin our friendship, but I want so much more."

He lifted my chin with his finger and his lips touched mine briefly, but I still closed my eyes and let myself be kissed and feel what I wanted to feel in acceptance to him. I wasn't giving in, though. I wasn't just giving up. I made myself a promise and I was determined to keep it, bronze-haired angel or no bronze-haired angel.

I smiled at him as we broke apart, letting him know he wasn't being rejected.

"Edward, I don't know what I feel. I want to but I can't. We'll be friends no matter what, but you have to know this: I want to, but I can't, ok? I'm sorry," I said, just as intense as he was.

He nodded and smiled, then said lightly: "You are an amazing singer, you know that? Are you any deeper into music than just hearing it?"

Again, caught off guard. Why does he _always_ catch me off guard? "Um, what do you mean?"

"Writing music, songs, playing the guitar, the piano? Anything?" He said.

"I can play both and write songs. But I really suck at picking the melody for a song. It usually takes me the longest time." I blushed.

Just as he opened his mouth to say something, Alice bounded in with big, high-quality-looking speakers, so we went to the other room and listened and sang along to half the 541 songs in her iPod, then Alice said we should watch TV, because it was only 10:30 p.m. She turned on the High Def TV and surfed through the channels, finally settling for _Wizards Of Waverly Place The Movie_, but I barely watched. I was thinking and looking at Edward and thinking some more about what he said. I thought about how I felt, and remembered the end to _Evermore_. The L-word. Love. That fitted and it felt right. I was in love with Edward. It was totally wrong, because I just met him this week, but it felt true.

I felt slightly happier, if that was even possible, as I watched Alex become the family wizard and then bring everything back to normal. Then Alice said she was tired and walked upstairs, leaving me alone with Edward again. He kissed me quickly again and then told me I shouldn't keep Alice waiting with an amused expression. I wanted to stay down with him and talk, but I knew he was right. I walked upstairs with my shoulders playfully, yet truly, slumped.

As I entered Alice's, she pulled me to the floor, where she'd set out blankets, pillows, quilts, it was so much it looked like there was a low mattress there. She sat me down and instantly began asking questions, and these, unlike Edward's, I was ready for: "Bella! Bella! Why didn't you tell me you liked Edward! That would have made everything so much flipping easier! You do like him, right?"

"Yes, Alice, I do. I didn't tell you because it's been building up for a few days, but I just kind of realized it when he kissed me the first time. Save your breath, you won't hear how. That is for me, and me only." _And everyone else who is reading this story_, I thought inside my head. "And the other times we were doing stuff, so I'm telling you now. I'm tired. Can we go to bed?"

"Ok, Bella. But you said the first time he kissed you. How many times has he kissed you?" I held up three fingers. She giggled.

I got ready for bed, removing my make up. Alice showed me a way that wasn't uncomfortable for keeping my hair the way it was for tomorrow and I did it, because I truly loved it. As Alice turned the lights out, I was still a little bit awake, and I heard when soft snores started from next to me. As I drifted toward sleep, lyrics and a melody came into my head. I turned on a small light I had and wrote it all down on a piece of paper, then set it down and went to sleep, hoping no one found it until I was ready to show it to them.


	6. Chapter 6

**I know I haven't updated in like forever. I'm sorry! I had to do a stupid project and my computer caught a 'virus' and my stepdad said it was because of this website. I told my stepmom and she said: "2 words: anti-virus". My mom didn't let me go on on our laptop.**

**BPOV:**

Morning sun hit the exposed skin on my face. I was on an unfamiliar bed, with an unfamiliar lilac quilt over half my face. Then the nights' events flooded back to me.

The makeover.

The karaoke.

The kiss.

The gossiping.

The other kiss.

The talking to him.

The other kiss.

Somehow, the kissing Edward seemed like the most unbelievable part of my night. It had been incredible to let my defenses down and just feel _him_. It felt right, somehow, but it wouldn't last. He would say goodbye soon enough. And I need to concentrate on my life, not on a boy.

I sat up and Alice squealed. "You're up!"

"Isn't it illegal to squeal this early in the morning?" I muttered.

"I see you're not a morning person… I think that'll change when you eat Edward's bacon," she taunted.

My face brightened up at his name. Alice noticed. She smiled and stood up, and when I did, she removed the thing in my hair so it would fall in more natural-looking curls. I smiled at how beautiful my hair looked and then we walked down to the kitchen.

Edward was already there, in a white T-shirt and blue flannel print PJ pants. He smiled at me as I came in and I blushed. I smiled back, too. Then I saw he was in front of a stove, where he was cooking half a dozen strips of bacon. There was s plate of scrambled eggs on the counter, and there was toast and French toast stacked in a plate next to the scrambled eggs. There was a jug of orange juice there, too.

"Wow! Did you just make this?" I asked, amazed. Even when I wanted something bad from Dad and had to butter him up, I didn't get this buffet. This was worthy of Embassy Suites. Ok, that's exaggerated, but still.

"Yeah. I usually make breakfast everyday because I'm up earliest. Pink Beach was here, because her health stuff is gone, but that doesn't count. By the way, Bella, the other day, you said something before you said 'Rosalie'. What do _you_ call her?"

I blushed. "Barbie." They burst out laughing. "Only in my head and when I'm alone, though."

When they quieted down, the bacon was already done and Edward was cooking another six just in case. When those were done, I was lightheaded with the smells and my hunger. I ate, appreciating the tastes. I watched as Edward scrutinized my face, looking for any signs of dislike, so I just smiled at him.

After we were done and I'd complimented Edward many times, Alice insisted if we wanted to get home before Emmett and Jasper we had to start getting ready.

I took a shower and Alice said it would be extra-warm today, so I was going to wear white Capri shorts and my V-neck deep blue blouse. I suddenly remembered that everything Alice had wanted me to wear yesterday had deep blue in it. Even the tank top underneath the hoodie I was stripping off. Weird. I wonder why she did that.

So anyway, I showered and put on my clothes, completed only by my worn out black Converse and walked out to Alice's room. As she passed me she told me to put on some light makeup, so I put on eyeliner, waterproof mascara and the rosy gloss she used last night. I grabbed my black totebag and put all my stuff in it, then checked myself in Alice's long mirror and went downstairs.

Of course, Edward was there, reading _Harry Potter and the ly Hallows_ again. He was almost done; maybe already by _The Prince's Tale_. I'd given him the book on Tuesday. I sat next to him and wondered whether Alice would give me an hour so I could buy a book in Port Angeles.

"Hey Edward. Listen, how are you reading so fast? I saw you yesterday and you were halfway done or something and now you must be way into the Hogwarts battle. What's the deal?" I asked.

"Um, I read really fast, especially with such a suspense-filled book. Thanks for lending it to me." He took a good look at me after looking inexplicably guilty. "You look spectacular." I blushed as he said that last part.

"Thanks. I'm done. I'm gonna buy a few books in Port Angeles. Do you think Alice would give me an hour in a bookstore?"

"You need an _hour _to look for a book?" He asked.

"No. I need twenty minutes to look for five books I want to read. It takes me twenty minutes to choose which ones I'm going to take, and another twenty in the music section," I said tersely. I being picked on because I take a lot of time looking for music and books.

"Sorry I offended you. Why don't you let me finish me book?" I nodded and I got out my iPod. I listened to Paramore and I wished I could get their new CD, _Brand New Eyes_. **(Author's Note: Already have **_**Brand New Eyes**_**. It it amazingly awesome!) **

Edward finished it before Alice bounded down.

We drove to Port Angeles listening through _Fearless_. I was singing along and Alice was singing the choruses. We got there and the nightmare started.

Alice took me through millions of stores. _H&M_, _Zara_, _Specs_, and those were only a few. She was going to drag me into _Pretty In Pink_ when the lady inside said only s wearing pink could come in. I think Alice would have gone back to _H&M_ and gotten me that pink sweater I hadn't liked and bought herself something if my stomach hadn't grumbled and Edward hadn't commented that Alice was starving me.

As we were walking to _Subway_, I said: "Alice, I have to go get some books and music. Can we go to the _Border's_ down the street before we go?"

She nodded and we entered the place. Alice--- to nobody's surprise--- got the little deli sandwich. I got a six-inch and Edward got a wrap. We finished and walked down the street to Border's.

"Bellsy, you've got thirty minutes," Alice said.

I gasped and half-ran to the books for teens section. I looked at titles. _Crazy Beautiful_, _The Mortal Instruments Series_, _Septimus Heap_, _Beyond the Spiderwick Chronicles_, _Harry Potter_, _The Tilight Saga_, and many, many others. **(Author's Note: Notice how Tilight is this. What's missing? W. I just needed to put that. I'll change the name of the characters.)** I grabbed _Crazy Beautiful, The Mortal Instruments- City of Bones, and Tilight_. The first one was a modern retelling of _Beauty and the Beast_, the second sounded pretty cool, and the third one. Hmm, let's read the back:

_Three things I was absolutely positive:  
__First, Edmund was a vampire.  
__Second, there was a part of him--- and I didn't know how nt that part might be--- that thirsted for my .  
__And third, I was unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him._

That sounds just wow. A falls in love with a vampire. Screw Septimus; I'll read this book now.

*Septimus Heap walks in wearing his green robes and throws his FLYTE charm at Bella's face. (This is happening inside her mind.)*

It had the picture of an apple in white hands in the front and it looked dark, considering the black backround. I grabbed it and bought the whole _Tilight Saga, The Mortal Instruments _and _Crazy Beautiful_. I spent a lot of money, but I had more. I'd worked back in Phoenix a lot.

I walked to the music aisle. Instantly, I looked for Paramore, Taylor Swift, KSM, and all my favorites. I found the new Paramore CD, a KSM CD and an announcement for Taylor Swift _Fearless- Platinum Edition- with six new songs and footage from backstage_. I had to get that.

I paid for all my stuff and found Edward holding _Harry Potter and the ly Hallows_ in his hands. No bookmark on it. He read it faster than I had the first time. Wow. I grinned at him as Alice led us out so we could get to her house and I could pack up.

In the car we listened to my new KSM CD and I fell in love with _Crazy Over You_. Ironic, huh? **(Author's Note: Listen to the song and then you'll know why it's ironic.) **When we got to their house, Alice made me try on and all the clothes so she could take pictures and I was surprised at how pretty they looked on me. I looked beautiful. And then Alice went downstairs to make pasta while I got my stuff ready.

Edward came in the room as I tried to get all the books to fit, because in truth, I really hadn't thought of how I was going to fit all my stuff inside, and I'd bought a _lot_ of big books. And Alice had bought me a pair of jeans, two sweaters and I'd gotten a bunch of T-shirts and normal shirts. I smiled at Edward as he came over to help me.

After 10 solid minutes of yanking, shoving, cussing, and no progress, Edward gave up and said he'd ask Alice for a suitcase. I thanked him and started folding my clothes, but he stopped me. I looked at him.

"What?" I asked.

"Nothing, I just…. Would you like to see my room?" He said hesitantly.

"Yeah, sure." I'd been curious to see what type of room Edward had. Was he the type of guy that had his dirty clothes and old shoes all over? Or was he tidy with books all over the shelves and a desk with a Mac? Or would he be in the middle? With a semi-messy room and yet tidy? Like everything's everywhere, and yet that's where it belongs?

Edward grabbed my hand and that sensation, plus the butterflies I'd had all day, came back. He led me through the hall, and stopped at the end. Where there was a closed white door. It had a paper taped to it that read in elegant script: _"Edward's Room, Enter At Your Own Risk."_ He turned the knob and opened the door.

His room was unexpected, to say the least. There were three walls, and two were painted a dull gold, while the other one stayed white. There was a notice board with a calendar, some flyers and a single poster. There was a poster behind the door, which, in contrast with the white door, being dark blue, looked pretty cool. There was a glass door opening into the forest around the house, and there was a desk with--- just as I predicted--- an Apple laptop. He had a few notebooks stacked in the desk, plus a bookshelf that was halfway filled. There was a white bed in the middle of the room. The covers were white and the pillows were black. There was a picture propped up on the bedside table. It was a picture of all the Cullens dressed in fancy clothes, making them looking even more beautiful. There were more notebooks and pieces of paper around the table and desk, as if he'd written something and pulled the paper out, then kept moving it. Around the east wall, there was an ornate piece of furniture. It wasn't big or show-offy, but it was really impressing. It held iPod speakers, a delicate-looking sound system and a few stacks of CDs. I noticed a box next to the bed that held small, brown, leather-bound books. They didn't have titles. With a jolt I realized they were journals. The ones at the top looked newer and the ones on the sides looked used, but cared for.

"Edward, this is amazing," I said.

I walked around and stopped at the shelves that held more books than anything I'd seen outside a Library. I looked over the titles until something seemed off: Edward had a box set of all the Harry Potters. Including the last one.

"Edward, why did you ask me for Harry Potter 7 if you already had it?" I asked carefully.

"Excuse me?" He sounded surprised. Not angry or appalled, just surprised.

"You have Harry Potter 7. Why'd you ask for my copy?"

He shrugged. "I couldn't find mine. On Thrusday I cleaned my room and found it behind the laptop."

Something was fishy, but since he had nothing to say I let it go. "Ok, then." I continued looking trhough titles until Alice screamed for us to eat Rotini.

We walked downstairs and sat down, and as I was walking in, I think I caught a flash of wavy golden hair flying out the door. Great. Well, at least she wasn't going to eat with us.

We ate in silence, that is until Emmett pushed the door open with much more force than necessary and boomed: "Hey! I smell pasta!" He walked in with the air of someone who was proud of themself, and sat down next to Alice, who got up to get him a plate.

He ate his food eagerly, and he was half-done when Jasper came in and sat across from Alice. We sat in silence and once I finished I put my plate in the sink, and was about to wash it when Edward said: "Don't. I'll do it. Tell Alice to get you a bag."

I nodded and Alice stood up and led me to a closet, where she got me a big suitcase and took me to her room, then went back to eat.

I put all my clothes folded inside at the bottom, then the all the books except _City of Bones _that I'd bought at _Border's_. Then the CDs except the KSM one and closed the bag with ease. I went back downstairs, sat in one of the couches and began reading _CoB_.

I read through the first chapter--- _Pandemonium_--- and stopped as Clary saw Jace, Alec, and Isabelle, plus the demon, or whatever it was.

Alice had called me. She called again: "Bella! Didn't you hear me? We have to go! I have to get you home!"

Alice walked in the room, looking dangerously annoyed, and when her eyes met mine she glared. "Come on! Get you bag."

I oblidged and when I was downstairs, I bumped into Edward. "I'm worried. Who's driving me home? The nice guy standing in front of me? Or the hyperactive Pixie who looks like she wants to kill me right now for not hearing her call me the first time?" That's how I was: Calling him the nice guy while implying I kinda liked him. Maybe het got the hint. (I feel so flirty. It's so not me! God, help me!)

"I'll drive you home, if you want." He shrugged. (Yes! He got the hint!) "Another thing, if you could, please help me with my Spanish. I have a test on Tuesday and I'm completely lost." There was a pleading in his voice that just about made me melt. And how could I not!?! It was hanging out with him, and he'd asked me.

"Sure. You can come by pretty much at any time you want, but call first, ok?" I smiled at him as we walked through the mist toward his perfectly maintained car.

I got in and he put the bag in the trunk, then got in and asked: "Do you want some music, or do you want to talk?"

"Can we talk?" He nodded and I closed my eyes.

There was silence.

"Bella?" I opened my eyes wearily. "Would you like to go... I mean, you don't have to... It's just---"

"Spit it out, Ed," I said playfully.

"Would you like to go to the movies on Friday?" That sure as hell caught me off guard.

"I--- I---. I'm not sure if--- I---" I stuttered. I wished I could say yes, but I'd just end up like one of those s in eighth grade who was just used and then thrown away. I knew Edward wasn't like that, but I didn't know him that well. Heck, I hadn't even known him for a week. Some part of me thought maybe, just maybe, that there was a small possibility I would end up sad and lonely. Like I always have been.

"It's ok if you don't want to. I mean, I was just wondering." He sounded sad. I had to make thins right.

"It's not that I don't want to." That part was true. "I just have--- an appointment. Yeah, an appointement that day. And I can't go. I'm sorry."

He still looked sad, but he brightened up a bit.

He drove through the town in silence while I stared into the forest. Why did my life have to be so complicated? Why couldn't Edward just be my friend? As I thought this I knew I didn't want it to be true. I liked Edward, and if he just liked me like a friend, then I'd just be the weepy, depressed nerd in a lame Sitcom wanting the cutest guy in school. I didn't want that.

He stopped and I looked around. We were already at my house.

"Why do you drive like a maniac?" I asked him.

"I don't try. It's an indulgence. We all like to drive fast," was his only answer.

I started opening the door with my right hand, and he grabbed my left.

"Can I go in and work on my Spanish?" He asked.

"Uh..." I got lost in the intensity of his stare... Again. I blinked several times. "Yeah, I guess. Dad's not here today, until seven thirty."

He nodded and we both got out. I got my bag and opened the house, then turned on the lights and put my bag in my room. I got out all my stuff and put it in it's new place; the clothes with all their tags, the books in their shelves, where I thought they looked good, my stuff back where it had been. Then I put the bag in a corner and got out my Spanish book and notes.

"Here, you can get a piece of paper and help yourself." He got up and took a piece of paper from my desk, then sprawled himself on my floor. I sat next to him and said: "What do you need to know?"

"Verbs and adjectives, then we have to write a paraghraph with verbs and adjectives about a person you care for dearly," he said. There was a tenderness in his voice as he said the last part.

"Ok, well, what do you have to do for the verbs and adjectives?"

"Um, we have to write 20 verbs and 20 adjectives, I think," he said.

"Well, I... um... I think I could help you with that..." I said in an off-hand tone. Edward was looking at me with those intense eyes again. It scared me. I got lost _again_ in the intensity of his stare... When was that ever going to stop?

"You know something I'd rather you helped me with?" He slid sideways and suddenly I was laying next to him, and he was looking up at me. He lifted his face up to mine and as his lips brushed mine very softly, my phone rang.

"Damn," I muttered as I got up reluctantly. I got my phone and answered. "Hey Dad."

"Hey Bells, I wanted you to know I'm on my way home with some pizza. Where are you?" Said my Dad.

"Um, I'm home. I was helping Edward study." I thought about it. "Yay, pizza!"

"Alright...? Honey, we're going down to the reservation to visit my friend Billy, that's why I have the pizza. Can you tell Edward he should go home?" Dad said in a careful voice.

"Sure thing, Dad. I'll do that. When are you getting here?"

"In about ten minutes..." He said slowly.

"Ok, Dad. See you then!" I hung up and turned to Edward.

"You have to go..." His face fell. "It's just that my dad's taking me to see some of his friends or something and he'll be here soon, and he asked me to tell you to go home..."

"Ok, well, see you later, then..." As he passed, he put his arm around me and kissed me softly, then he drew back. His eyes were full of happiness, but as they gazed into my brown eyes, his happy eyes darkened and they were replaced by sad eyes. He walked out and after a few moments, I heard the door close.

As I got ready for Charlie's visit to Billy, I realized why Edward's eyes had turned sad: Mine had been sad, because I'd been breaking my promise. I guess I got what I wanted, but with a few drawbacks. I never had it easy. Edward liked me, but I couldn't like him, because I just couldn't.

I heard Dad's tires on the driveway...


	7. Chapter 7

**Ok, I'm so sorry I haven't updated in like forever. I'm so intrigued writing the other story I just started on. It's called: "Bottom of the Ocean! Get Me OUT!". I'm getting a bit obsessive. In my opinion, the chapters are relatively short, but there's so much in them I can't make them too long. So here's the next chapter:

* * *

**

**BPOV:**

As Dad's tires hit the driveway I looked at what I was wearing. I decided to change into jeans and a T-shirt, but a form-fitting one, so it flattered me. It was blue, and it had white flowers weaving in and out of each other at the far corner in the bottom. My Converse were obviously my choice shoes, but I put half my hair up in a half-pony. I used my bag and put all the stuff I needed, and by the time I was done, Dad was already downstairs in jeans and a button-down. I got my ivory hoodie and put it on, and we got oin the car. The smell of pizza drove me crazy the fifteen minutes of the drive. By minute seven, however, dad asked: "Bella, could you tell me what Edward Cullen was doing in our house?"

"Uh, he said he needed help with his Spanish, I think," I answered.

"Well, Carlisle showed me Edward's grades, for some unknown reason, and Edward had a perfect grade in Spanish. I asked Carlisle and he said Edward can speak fluent Spanish. What did you kids do?" He added suspiciously.

"Well, we started talking, then he.. he told me what he had to learn...... and.. and then we... uh.. we--" I stuttered.

"You what?"

"I'd rather not say. It's not inappropriate. It's G Rated, but I'd still rather not say," I said. I looked down at my hands, blushing. God, I swear, one day, I'll have blushed so much my blush will have worn out and I'll have permanently pale skin forever.

"Did he touch you? Did he say he likes you? Loves you? Did you snuggle close to each other? I'm your father, Bella, I need to know these things," he said urgently.

"We just kissed. We were about to when I got your call and muttered 'damn it'. Since when have you been such a gossip girl? I mean, really?"

"I am not. Hey, that's Billy in the wheelchair, and that's Jacob." Dad parked and waved, then got out. I sighed and got out.

I walked over to Jacob and Billy Black. "Hi, I'm Bella. You must be Billy." I shook Billy's hand and Dad turned and rolled him into the house. That left me and Jacob alone.

Jacob was cute, in his own way. He couldn't be over fifteen, and his face still held the childish roundness, but his eyes, black as midnight, were so beautiful. He haad russet skin and long black hair, which he kept in a pony tail at the nape of his neck. Kinda weird, but I guess it's a tribe thing.

"Hi, I'm.. I'm Jacob." He extended his hand. I shook it.

"I'm Bella, though you probably know that already." We laughed and walked back to our parents, and sat on a small couch.

The pizza party was fun. We ate really good food, I didn't have to cook, there was no awkwardness whatsoever, and the conversation was fluid, and there were no pauses. After we were done eating, Dad and Billy went to watch a game on TV. I looked longingly outside. It wasn't cold. In fact, it was quit warm for Forks.

"Do you wanna take a walk through the beach?" Jacob asked, seeing my gaze.

"Don't we have to ask them?" I jerked a thumb in the general direction of where the men were.

"Yeah, but they're so entranced they'll just shake a hand and not notice. Watch," he added. "Hey Dad? Can Bella and I take a walk on the beach?"

As he predicted, at the same time, both men raised their right arm, did a swinging motion that could be passed off as a yes and put their arm back down. Jacob grinned at me. "Told you so." He lead me out toward the beach, and it wasn't all that warm, really. I was hugging my shoulders because my clothes were so thin. Jacob seemed to notice.

"Are you ok?" He asked.

"Yeah, I'm just a bit cold, that's all." _I'm also missing Edward a lot, _I thought, _but there's no need to mention that. _

We stopped at a tree trunk that was turned over and bleached white by the salt and sat on it. I looked out at the sea. It was so beautiful. The waves crashing into the rocks. It was very peaceful. I smiled a small smile that Jacob would not see.

"So, how do you like Forks?" Jacob asked to break the silence.

"Well, it's really green and wet, which is not my thing, but I guess it's growing on me. I kind of like it. The house is small, but it's fine, and my car is---".

"That was my soon-to-be-truck!" Jacob whisper-yelled. I looked over at him, alarmed. I didn't want a fight, especially when he was so big and tall and I was so puny.

"Are you mad it's mine?" I asked slowly.

"No way! I didn't want that car. I was building my own, but it was starting to cost more money than my allowence had, and Dad was getting mad, so he said that I couldn't build a car while we had a truck in perfect condition here. I was so glad when Charlie took it. Phew," he laughed. Jake's laugh was contagious. I laughed too. Soon, I don't know why but, we were rolling in the sand laughing our freaking asses off. (ROFLMAO.)

After our fit of silent laughter, we sat up and looked sideways at each other and laughed again. I was enjoying myself, and no one was glaring at me. It felt nice to be hanging out with someone so easy to be with. Jacob was funny and to be with him was effortless.

Don't get me wrong. I have no romantic feelings for him. I don't plan on it. One boy is enough for me. Jacob was a friend. And a good one at that.

"Jake, I think we should go back," I said.

"Yeah, we probably should." We stood up, then he pointed at something in the distance. "That's one of the tribe islands. We're not allowed to go on them because they're supposed to harbor the souls of the early Spirit Warriors. It's a tribe legend. Our name for it is Hekamintuo." **(I just totally made that up. I don't even know if they have that. Or if there's an sland named that.)**

We walked silently back to his house, where Charlie and Billy were drinking some soda, waiting for us. As we walked in they smiled and Dad said we had to "hit the hay". We left, but not after Jacob said he'd come and visit me some time. I gave him my number so he could call.

What a fun night, don't you think? And it was such different fun from last night's. Alice had practically used me as a Barbie Doll, and then we'd had some fun watching people comment on our comments on that website, and Edward had kissed me... several times... But tonight had been laugh if off fun. We'd rolled in wet sand! So, I liked jacob, STRICTLY AS A FRIEND, and he was fun to be around.

I went to bed and woke up the next morning to my phone ringing Alice's tone.

"Yes?" I sighed.

"Where the hell were you last night?! Edward came in like an hour after you guys left, but I couldn't reach you! You weren't answering! Why in the sam heck weren't you answering?!" Alice screeched at the phone.

"Calm down, Alice," I heard Edward's voice say from the other side.

"Alice, could you please NOT scream? You woke me up!"

"Sorry, Bella," Edward's voice said.

"Alice, do you have me on freaking speaker?"

"Yes," Alice and Edward chorused.

I groaned. "Well, then, if you must know--" I broke off, awaiting their reaction.

"We do want to know! Did you go to Port Angeles and get drunk in a club? Did you do your homework?" Alice was obviously speaking. I didn't need to tell you that, did I?

"I went with my dad to see some friends of this down at La Push. Sheesh, Alice, you jump to the craziest conclusions. I'm not that exciting."

"Well, can I come over later?" Edward asked.

"Around ten, I guess. I't, what, seven? I'm not getting any more sleep, anyway," I said.

"Ok, bye." The line cut off.

I sighed and got out of bed, then went downstairs and cooked up some breakfast. I finished my cereal and took a shower, then put on some sweats and started cleaning the house. Dad wasn't home, of course. He was at the police station, as always.

I gave up trying to clean the bathroom at nine thirty, so I put the stuff away and played some music. I played _Misery Business:_

_I'm in the business of misery  
Let's take it fro the top  
She's got a body like an hourglass  
It's ticking like a clock  
It's a matter of ti--_

Someone knocking on the door. It was not even nine fifty. Well, then. I was surprised to see not Edward, but Jacob on my doorstep.

"Hey, Jake! What are you doing here?" I asked.

"I wanted to see you. I kow I shouldv'e called, but it's ok, right?" He smiled.

"Sorry. I'm having a friend over. There he is now." Edward's Volvo was pulling up. "Next time could you please call? That way you know if I'm not busy." His shoulders slumped and we walked off with a sulky 'See ya later, then'.

I tried to feel guilty, but seeing Edward there made it hard.

"Hey," I said.

"Hey yourself. Who was that kid?" He asked.

"That's Jacob Black. I was hanging out with him yesterday. Come in, why don't you? I'm getting cold." Edward walked in and hugged me softly, then I closed the door and turned to him. "Why'd you come so early today?"

"Um, my Spanish test is tomorrow--" I cut him off.

"Cut the lie, Edward. I know you speak fluent Spanish. Why are you such a liar?" I was getting worked up. First he lies about the Harry Potter book and now this. What is his problem?

"How do you know that?" He said quickly.

"Carlisle showed my father your grades. Why are you lying to me?" I glared at his silence. "Answer me!"

"I, well, I... I wanted a connection to you at first, and having something that was yours was like that. Plus, the book had your signature on it and your smell. Then I wanted to spend more time with you, and Alice said it was an innocent way to do so. I'm sorry I lied. I shouldn't have. I know you don't like liars." He had the decency to look guilty about it, at least. It made me sad that I caused it.

"Hey, if you wanna spend time with me, you could do something else, and not lie about it. You wanna watch a movie?" I asked.

"Sure. What do you have?" We walked over to the TV Charlie loved so much and I looked through the stack.

Great. Little girlie movies, sport specials, sport movies, and Christmas specials. What am I going to do now? Hey, wait! There's that one funny movie with Dwayne Johnson and Madison Pettis_. The Game Plan_, I think. That one's nice.

"You ok with watching this?" I showed him the cover.

"Is it good?" I nodded. "Then yeah, I guess." He sat on the couch as I put the DVD in. I sat next to him, but I was still enforcing my promise, so I wasn't snuggling. Even though I totally wish I was. It's amazing how every fiber in your body wants and longs for what it can't have. Just happens to be that I could have Edward, but I can't. Crap. Why is life so freaking complicated for me? I believe I've asked that before, am I correct?

The movie started and I must say it was nice. We were halfway through it when Edward started interrogating me about Jacob.

"So, was that Jacob kid nice to you?" He asked casually.

"Yeah. We were bored, so we walked along the beach and sat down. Then one of us said something mildly funny and all of a sudden we were rolling on the sand laughing." I was shaking with laughter just remembering. Edward seemed to notice.

"What was so funny?"

"I think it was something with my truck. Yeah, yeah, it was that he was glad Charlie bought it." I was laughing now. Edward wasn't. You had to be there to find it so funny.

"So you like him, then," Edward said. He was looking into my eyes, and I was trying to not get lost in his... And for the first time, I succeded.

"I like him... as a friend. He's funny, carefree and nice to be around." I threw caution to the winds. I just hoped Edward wasn't mad.

Wait, why should Edward be mad? So I made another friend. Big deal. It's not like I was going to ditch him and Alice for Jacob. I liked Jacob, but I'd divide my time, because losing Edward or Jacob was not a happy thought.

The movie ended and I made pizza and decided to go grocery shopping tomorrow after school. We ate and then I realized I needed to do my homework. I had Math and Spanish. Fun...

I finished the dificult worksheet with Edward watching me and it felt strange. Then I saw I had to write a paragraph in Spanish to practice for the test.

**(Author's Note: I'm going to write it in Spanish, but underneath it'll be in English.)**

_Hoy es un lindo dia. Esta mal que yo me sienta tan confundida. Pero mi corazon dice que amo a un chico cuando mi cabeza dice que tengo que amar a los estudios. Por eso no me gusta confiar en la gente. Cuando confias en alguien, les das el poder de herirte, porque los amas. Yo no llevo aqui mucho tiempo, pero se que amo a ciertas personas, y me asusta lo que me pueden hacer. Los amo demasiado._

**_Today is a nice day. It's wrong that I feel so confused. But my heart says I love a boy while my head says I have to love my studies. That's why I don't like trusting people. When you trust somebody, you give them the power to hurt you, because you love them. I haven't been here much time, but I know I love certain people, and I'm scared about what they can do. I love them too much._**

I hoped Edward didn't see the piece of paper. I put it in my binder and took it upstairs, then went back again and said: "Edward, I have to get ready bed, because Charlie will be home soon, which means it's quite late."

He showed no response except to shrug.

"What is up with you today?!" I yelled in a sudden fury. "You come in early, you lie to me, you question me about a boy I met YESTERDAY, and you stay even though you're doing nothing here!"

Edward looked shocked at my outburst, but then his eyes turned darker and sad. "I'll leave if you want me to." He shrugged on his coat and walked out. "See you tomorrow, Bella," he called over his shoulder as he got in his car. He left.

I felt empty. I told him to go when I really wanted him to stay. What the hell is wrong with me?


	8. Chapter 8 EPOV!

**Ok, I feel like I left this story in an cliffy sort of moment, so I'm going to try and write this fast. For those of you who are reading "Bottom Of The Ocean! Get Me OUT!", I said it usually takes me a few days to make a chapter, but I wrote that one in like one afternoon. I'm supposed to be writing an essay on Benedict Arnold, a traitor in the Revolutionary War, or whatever, but this is much more fun. I also got a few dresses for Christmas. One's green and blue and the other one's short, black, sparkly and with spaghetti straps. Anyway,I swore to myself I wouldn't do this, but I couldn't help it! I'm sorry me! So, here's the chapter:**

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**EPOV:**

I knew I was in love with Bella Swan. It was a feeling that wouldn't go away. My heart started racing and random thoughts like 'Oh, she looks so dazzling when she smiles,' and 'If Newton asks her out he'll be under a gravestone soon,' passed through my mind.

I turned in my bed I thought about that first day, the first glance, the first blush, the first smile.

Bella Swan. I'd heard the name repeated many times in the minds of my classmates. They were all gossiping about a new girl. Chief Swan's daughter, I'd heard. All the male students were joking about asking her out and how hot she was, and all the females from Lauren Mallory's gang were saying how stupid the whole thing was and how ugly her hair and clothes were. How plain she was. Then there were the loners, you know, people without a group? They were not gossiping, but I heard Tinia Graycoll say something about how the new student looked like an ex-loner.

I had not seen the girl yet, and neither had my family. I was the last to sit at the table, but from their bored looks, you could tell they weren't in the slightest bit interested in this new girl. Well, all but Alice, but Alice was Alice. She was always up for making a new friend, and she had been shut out by everyone when we started here because we "were all together. Like, _together, _together". That had been annoying. I didn't mind it, though, because they weren't talking about me, because I didn't have a girlfriend. The only thing that stopped the girls from throwing theirselves at me was Lauren Mallory's and Jessica Stanley's glares. I turned both of them down several times, but at least they gave up after their lucky numbe: 1901.

We were all eating, me silently, Jasper talking quietly to Emmett about a camping/hiking trip they had to ask permition for, Alice and Rosalie planning another one of their New-School-Year-Sleepover & Shop activities. By sleepover, it basically ment that Rosalie would sleep in a makeshift bed on Alice's floor. They did this all the time, so we were used to it.

I was eating my food absently, wondering what I'd do this weekend, when I felt some weight settle in the bench seat on the other side of the table. Then a brunette girl with pale skin glanced at us. She was beautiful. That much was clear. She had dark chestnut hair, chocolate brown eyes and very pale, clear skin. I knew this because as she looked at my family and then back to the book in her hands, I'd been looking in that direction, and she was in my peripheral vision.

She had a shy demeanor, as if she'd rather be anywhere than here, and I instantly knew that she was the new girl. She did look a bit like your average loner, but not as much as the others in this school. She was wearing skinny jeans with Converse and a purple top with a light hoodie over it. And what was on her face would intimidate anyone that hated Goth people. She had black eyeliner on, and she had earbuds on, probably listening to music. She was holding a book, and that was what she continued to do for the rest of the lunch hour.

I couldn't look away from her. Not even to tell my family who was sitting on our table. I was too mesmerized by the girl sitting on the table. Even just reading a book and popping tater totts in her mouth every now and then, she looked beautiful. I couldn't force myself to look away. Alice noticed.

"Edward, what are you staring at?" Alice asked.

"Nothing, nothing..." She glared at the side of my face that was actually facing her. "Well, it's... that girl, she's so beautiful."

Alice 'Hmm'ed, but commented nothing more and then the bell rung. I stopped staring as the girl's head snapped up.

I said goodbye to my family, and met a glare from Rosalie. Whatever it meant, I didn't really care. I walked off to my Biology class, and today I wasn't alone at my table. She was there, sitting on the chair next to the window, what used to be my chair. People that came in were whispering and pointing in her direction, and I could tell she noticed, but somehow it didn't bother her. She didn't even flinch.

I took my new chair and pulled it back, then put my book on the table, and she looked up. I sat and looked at her, then tentatively extended my hand.

"Hi, I'm Edward Cullen," I said. She didn't really shake my hand, so I let it fall.

"I'm Bella. Bella Swan. Well, actually, my name's Isabella, but I like Bella, so call me that." Her voice was sweet and yet strong, somehow. Clear, yet shy and quiet. She stopped talking suddenly, as if she thought she shouldn't say more.

Ok, you're new here, right?" I asked. I knew that, but I wanted to hear her sweet, clear voice again.

"Yeah," she muttered. It sounded like she didn't like that fact.

Then Mr. Banner called for attention and began his boring lecture. The class was uneventful, unless me looking at Bella all the time and thinking how beautiful she was counted as eventful.

The bell rung and Bella left the classroom without a word. It disappointed me that she wouldn't even say goodbye. It bothered me that I thought this way, I mean, I didn't know the girl, and she didn't know me.

But now Bella did know me. And she's been over at my house, and she's like best friends with Alice, and she knows my parents and she knows I really like her.

_What a mess_, I thought. I'd kissed her three times the night she'd been over, then once the day later. I didn't want to push my luck, but I wanted so much more. I wished that I could somehow take back the lie, or the thing I said about Jacob Black. Who knows? Maybe she wouldn't like me a liar or not, or a jealous fool or not. Either way, I'd just been kicked out of her house for being concerned, or maybe for lying. I hated not being with Bella. It made me feel empty inside.

Alice thought Bella liked me, but she hadn't seen the look on her face when she kicked me out. She hadn't seen the way her eyes had flashed when she'd confronted me about my Spanish. She probably hated me. She probably never wanted to see me again. That would kill me. Well, not kill, but it would be as if a dementor had Kissed me; I'd just be an empty shell. Nothing inside.

Someone knocked on my door. "Edward, I'm on the phone with Bella. She wants to talk to you. Is that ok?" She opened the door and gave me the phone, then left.

"Hello?" I said. My voice sounded sad even to me, so I was sure (and embarrassed) that she could hear it.

"Edward." I heard her intake of breath. "I'm sorry, I..."

She trailed off and I didn't say anything. I was too surprised. I expected her to shout and scream at me she never wanted to see me again. Why the hell was she apologizing?

"Um, well, I just wanted to say that, and I guess I'll see you tomorow," she said quietly. Then she hung up.

I hoped she didn't hate me. The 'sorry' suggested otherwise, but Alice had seen my expression when I came in, and I wouldn't put it past her to force Bella to say that. Then again, maybe it was just pity. Pity for me. Life couldn't get worse. I wanted her to be happy with me, and I'd made her pity me, and I'd only known her for a week.

I suck.

I fell asleep on the bed and only got up the next morning because I would get to see Bella. I wanted to see if she was mad, or sad, or anything else, because even if she didn't want me, I would still try and be her friend. Better to be in her life as less than what I wanted than not being in it at all.

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**I'm sorry it was so short. I just wanted you guys to see how Edward feels. I had promised myself I wouldn't do this, but I couldn't help it. I think there will be EPOV chapters around, but not everywhere. Please review!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Happy Holidays, everyone! I am so happy with what I got! I have skin problems, and I got the proactiv kit, and I hog computers a lot, and I got one of those HP Minis! AAAH! Now I can write way more often! I love you, Santa! Thanks for reading the story! This chapter is kind of miserable, I think it's necessary. Here goes:

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**BPOV:**

I'd called, and I tried to apologize, but the sadness in his voice hurt me. It made the apology seem wrong. I was trying to apologize for defending a friend. He should be the one apologizing. I didn't have time to wonder about this. It was time to go to bed. I had to see him at school tomorrow. And he'd see how much of a wreck I was.

I had cried after he left. I was positive my eyes would have circles beneath them for tomorrow, because I couldn't sleep. I wasn't even going to bother to put on eyeliner. I'd look even more Goth if I did. I wasn't wearing my usual cute stuff. Heck, I wasn't going to wear anything that Alice got me, because most of it was bright colors and things that looked good on me, and I seriously didn't want to be attractive.

I had kicked Edward out, and now I was paying for it.

I fell asleep and woke up in what felt like the blink of an eye. Crap. Was it time for school already? I glanced at my alarm clock. Yes, yes it was.

I dressed in my normal jeans, an oversized red T-shirt, and my Converse. My hair was straight and I put it in a high pony tail so it wouldn't come apart. My eyes did have circles under them, and I didn't bother for make up, because I just didn't have the patience. I ate a small breakfast, having no appetite, and drove to school.

I was dreading seeing Alice, because of her obvious reaction to my outfit, and Rosalie, because of all the glaring, and most of all Edward, because of what happened and what I did. I didn't want to face this. This was exactly what I had needed to avoid. I was already less focused because of Edward. I was already hoping he would shrug it off and go on as if it hadn't happened, but the sadness in his voice was nearly tangible. He wouldn't forget.

I was dreading seeing Alice because she would kill me because of these clothes. She bought me really nice things, and I was wearing old jeans, a battered, oversized T-shirt and Converse. I could see what was wrong with my outfit, but at least I wasn't wearing something _completely_ unacceptable. Unacceptable would be a long brown skirt, a pink polka dot blouse and cowboy boots. Picture me in that for a moment. Then shudder. I did.

I pulled in and walked in the general direction of my locker, hoping to not bump into anyone from the Cullen/Hale family. I was lucky. I reached my locker and got my books, then headed to class. Today we were discussing a story I'd read billions of times before, so I hadn't bothered reading it. I settled into my seat and waited for everyone to trickle in after the bell.

The class droned on and on and I was glad when it ended, but then the day sped up and suddenly, I was standing in the lunch line. I could feel Alice's stare, Edward's denied yet unsuccessful attempt to not stare, and Barbie's glare. Emmett and Jasper were talking amongst themselves, I assumed. I was feeling slightly sick, so I just got a lemonade. I made my way to where Angela sat alone, when a tiny arm caught mine.

"Bella, what are you doing?" Alice asked.

"I know I'm not wanted at your table, so I was going to ask if I could sit with Angela," I said slowly, not looking her in the eye.

"But we _do_ want you at the table. Pink Beach is Pink Beach, but Jasper and Emmett want to hear how badly I tortured you and Edward-- aaah! What the crap are you wearing?!" She said.

"Never mind that now. Alice, just because you want me and Edward together, or me and Rosalie to be friends doesn't mean it's going to happen. I'm sorry, but I can see that you do want me there, but the rest don't. I'm sorry," I said.

That visibly hurt Alice. She dropped my arm. "Alright then. I'm sorry I asked. I still want to be your friend, but if you don't want to hang out because of my family I could go to your place. It doesn't matter, anyway." She turned to walk away. Half way turned, she turned back and handed me a familiar-looking folded piece of paper. "Oh, before I forget, you left this in my room the other day. I was cleaning and I found it. I didn't read it or open it at all. Bye, see you at Gym." This time she did walk away.

I got to Angela's table and asked: "Do you mind me sitting here today?" She shook her head and I sat down and opened the piece of paper.

Crap. It was the song I'd written Friday night before going to bed. It was intact, so Alice hadn't opened it, but I was still mad at myself for leaving it there, where he could find it and read me like lyrics. I couldn't throw this away, because it was my best work, but I couldn't risk anyone ever seeing it. I decided to put it in my binder and as soon as I get home to put it under my pillow until I could figure out a tune.

Angela asked if I was hungry, I responded with a negative and that was it for conversation. It wasn't uncomfortable, because neither of us felt the need to fill up every silence with inane chatter. I could still feel Alice's concerned stare and Edward's unwilling one, too, but I concentrated on my lemonade. I wanted desperatly for the bell to ring. It finally did. I was happy it had, but then Angela asked me who my lab partner was.

"Um, Edward Cullen," I said. That brought on a whole wave of misery. I felt it crash and hurt. Even saying his name hurt. What the hell?

"Oh, I'm with Ashley Dowling." **(Author's Note: If you look at _Midnight Sun_, in the first chapter, there _is_ an Ashley Dowling. And in _New Moon_, I think the guy with the really expensive auto repair shop is named Dowling. I don't know if that girl is in Bella's class, but I didn't want Lauren because she'd be teasing Angela, and I didn't want Jessica because she'd be paying attention to Mike and Edward's every move.) **

We entered the classroom, and I prepaired myself for the painful hour. I went to my seat and sat quietly and took my spiral notebook out to take notes. He came in just before the bell rung and prepaired himself for class, too. Before Mr. Banner started talking, however, he slipped me a note.

_Bella, I know you're probably mad me, but could we PLEASE talk this over? Meet me outside the school Gym around 2:35. Don't try and escape, cuz Alice is in your class and she said (quote): "I will watch her like a hawk. If she tries to escape she'll find herself with no car!"  
Sorry. Not my idea.  
--E_

I looked at him questioningly. My eyes were supposed to say: _What do we have to talk over?_, but I got lost in his eyes. His emerald eyes. And my breathing hitched. And I was wishing I hadn't made him mad. And I was pulled back to reality, where love isn't always first, by Mr. Banner saying: "Class, today we are discussing celular anatomy."

I hastily looked away and focused on taking my notes, or at least tried. Edward is so hypnotic it makes me want to slap him, which surprises me because I'm usually not a very violent person. I was so unfocused Mr. Banner had to repeat his question about cromosones twice before I understood he was talking to me. Edward whispered the answer under his breath, and I answered and then the class went back to taking notes. I nodded in thanks and he looked pointedly at the note. I nodded aprovingly and went back to my notes.

The bell rung and Edward stood up and looked at me.

"There's nothing to say, but I'll go. I can't stay long, because I have work to do, and I have to send some e-mails," I answered while picking up my books. I left without looking at him and ran to my locker to get my Gym clothes. I made it in time. I was changing under the eyes of Alice-The-Hawk. As we walked out, she started walking backwards and asked: "Are you meeting him later?"

I nodded as Coach Clapp told us to grab a partner and a soccer ball and started working on passes. Alice grabbed me instantly and took a ball and dragged me to an unocuppied corner. "I need to talk to you."

She passed me the ball. I stopped it. "I can see that." I passed it.

She caught it. "What happened yesterday? Can you tell me _that_?" She passed the ball with much more force than necessary.

I stopped it and almost tripped in the act. "My friend Jacob came over and left as Edward got there and then he was mean and he lied to me. I sorta kicked him out, but I'm sorry for that." I passed the ball weakly and she caught it sharply.

"My brother is falling in love with you." She passed the ball.

I was so distracted the ball passed me and hit the people that were behind us. Just so happened to be Mike Newton and Lauren Mallory. "Ow, Mikey, I think she broke my leg!" Lauren whined.

I walked over. "I'm so sorry. I really didn't mean to." Mike gave me the ball and Lauren glared, then tripped and fell onto Mike on purpose. "I guess that's my que to leave." I walked back and took my place next to Alice. I passed her the ball.

"What do you feel for him?" Alice caught the ball and held it, as if daring me not to answer.

"Alice, I can't talk about this right now. Not now, not with a cow, not in a box, not with a fox. I'm sorry." I begged her with my eyes to let it drop. I was sure she wouldn't.

"Why not?" She passed the ball.

"I can't talk about it, Alice. I wasn't _supposed _to fall in love with anybody." I caught the ball as I noticed my slip. I wanted very badly to verbalize a particurarly colorful cuss word I never used. Alice had a smile on her face. Like she knew what I was thinking. I wasn't passing the ball.

"I knew--" Alice was cut off by Coach Clapp. "Now girls! This is not time for chitchat! Tomorrow we're actually practicing soccer and I can't have you not know how to throw a ball." He walked away and I passed her the ball.

"I knew this would happen. You're in love with my brother." She passed the ball with a huge grin on her face.

"No! This is the reason I kept to myself! The drama! The hurt! I can't take it!" I walked and purpousely tripped. "Coach, can I go see the nurse? I think I might've sprained my ankle," I said.

"Sure, then, Miss Swan. Webber, go with her!" Angela helped me get to the nurse's office, and then said: "Bella, what were you and Alice Cullen talking about? You looked really pissed and annoyed."

"Nothing of importance, really," I said nonchalantly. It didn't matter if I loved Edward. Because everything that I tried to build with him would be ruined when I went off to study in college. So, it shouldn't matter that after a year and a half I'd be gone and I would probably never see him again. It shouldn't matter that that thought hurt like hell.

I hated this. This longing. This sadness. This way.

"Are you ok, dear?" The nurse asked me as she put an ice pack on my ankle.

"Yes." The pain was dissolving. "The school day will be over soon. Can I go?"

"Yes, Miss Swan. Dear, if you have any trouble, take some Tylenol for the pain. My, it's the second time I have you in my office in two weeks. You really are something, aren't you?" She nodded towards the door. "You can go, dear."

I smiled and got up and Angela helped me get to the locker room before the bell rang. As I was replacing my Gym shorts for my jeans, the bell rung. I swaped my white T-shirt for the oversized one I'd been wearing before, switched my shoes and put my iPod back in my pocket. Alice did indeed watch me like a hawk as Edward promised via note. She told me to wait for her, and she took a _long_ time. She brushed her hair, re-did her make up, and had to fold her clothes before putting them in her bag. Finally, she let me go to my locker to dump my things and get my books and binder. Then she led me to where Edward was meeting me.

He was there, waiting. He looked tense, like I'm sure I did. And he smiled tighly as he saw me.

"I leave you here, then," Alice said. "Edward, you can ride with Bella, I'll go get you around five." She left.

A moment of silence.

"What are we doing, Edward?" I asked awkwardly.

"I wanted to talk to you... about this weekend..." He left it hanging there, as if I should start talking. I didn't.

"Well, I'll be first to admit I went over the line, but I'm sorry. I really do like you, and I'm sorry if I made you feel pressured or uncomfortable, or anything. I'm sorry I lied to you about the Spanish thing, and I'm sorry I was so rude about Jacob Black, but I just... I can't stand to see you so happy with someone else.... I-- I--".

"_I'm _sorry I was so mean. I got mad and I'm sorry if I lead you on... I really am... I hope you can forgive me... I have to go." I turned to leave so he wouldn't see the tears in my eyes. I could see the hurt in his as he got what I was saying. I lied to make it easier for him. He would get over me, date some other girl and be happy. I started to walk away, but he held my arm back.

"No, you don't." His voice broke.

"I'm sorry. I have to go, now." I walked toward my car and got it. I turned on the heat and pulled out. I half-expected him to come out and get in so he could wait for Alice, but he didn't. I left after about fifteen minutes. As I turned on the highway it started raining. I got home and did my pathetic homework, cooked dinner, and started studying for tomorrow's Spanish test. Finally, Dad got home and we ate. And it was finally late enough to be bedtime.

I changed mechanically, got into bed and cried.

I cried because I told Edward I "was sorry for leading you on". That meant I was saying I never liked him as more than a friend. And I said that so he'd get over me and leave me alone. And I would never get over him. I knew this wasn't a phase, and I knew this would never change, even if it hadn't gotten to it's full potential yet.

I was glad to fall into the safe oblivion that was sleep, but my dreams were infested with Edward, too, so it's wasn't a safe haven anymore. I need this madness to stop.


	10. Chapter 10

**This chapter is also very depressing, so I'm sorry. I need this one here, too. I also need this one note before I begin:  
****I feel so unbelievably lame. I'm watching JONAS and I could be writing the newest chapter for Bottom Of The Ocean.**

* * *

**BPOV:**

It's been three weeks. I haven't talked to Alice, Edward, or any of the other Cullens. I purposely stopped talking to them. Whenever Alice tried to talk to me, I didn't respond, and after a few days she stopped trying to talk to me. Edward didn't try, and hurt me as it might, I didn't try to talk either. I only spoke to him when it was necessary. Like when we had to do a project and we had to discuss what we were doing. Not what we were '_doing_' doing, like what project we were doing.

I didn't talk to them, and I became a loner again. The only difference was that now I had Angela with me, and she was so silent and "leaving you alone so you can deal by yourself" kind of person that it felt like I was alone.

I read my books, I got more music and listened to it, I wrote stories, but I didn't write songs anymore. The last song I wrote was the one about Edward, and it was still under my pillow, because I wasn't ready to finish it. I'm not going to show you the lyrics because it would hurt too much.

I know that you guys know I liked Edward. And you guys deserve the truth. So here goes: I didn't like Edward anymore. I was in love with him. Nobody except me, myself, and I knew that. And I don't plan on anyone else finding out. (I mean, you found out, but I pretty much told you, so it doesn't count.)

I wasn't completely out of touch, though. I watched him. He didn't look very happy, to say he least. He was still himself, just more toned down. He still joked with Jasper and Emmett, he still groaned when Alice mentioned shopping, he still read books that I liked, he still doodled senseless things on the back of his Science notebook, he still looked beautifully handsome, he was still _good_, but he wasn't as animated as he had been. I missed his presence.

You're probably wondering how I know all this. Well, I wasn't stalking him. That didn't go with my plan at all. I looked at him occasionally, but not too much. He didn't notice me staring. At least I don't think he did. I'm not sure if Alice noticed, though. Because even if I didn't hang out with her anymore, sometimes she sent me this knowing look. As if she knew what was going on in my head.

It was worse the first week, when Alice approached me and I had to ignore her and walk away. It was very painful knowing I was that close to him, and to have to walk away. It was very painful when it hit me how close I was to having real friends. It was almost too painful that first day, when I took my Spanish test. The instructions said: **(It's going to be in Spanish since it's a Spanish test, but at the bottom it will be translated.)** 'Escriba un parrafo usando por lo menos tres adjetivos. El parrafo tiene que ser sobre una persona que tu quieres mucho.'

My mind flew to Edward, but I couldn't write about him. I couldn't write about my mother, because I didn't have words to describe her, and I couldn't write about my father, because I honestly didn't know that much about him. I settled for Alice.

'Voy a escribir de Alice Cullen. Fue la primera persona que me hablo cuando llegue a la escuela, y me invito a su casa. Somos buenas amigas, aunque ella es un poco hyperactiva. Como yo soy mas calmada, ella me ayuda a ser mas animada y a divertirme. Me gusta estar con Alice, y yo le caigo bien a su familia. Yo la quiero mucho, y por eso escribo sobre ella.'

I finished the test, handed it in and asked if I could go to the bathroom. I cried because I would never be able to spend time with Alice again. If I wanted my plan to work, then I had to ignore her, and disengage myself from her family, and get away from anything I wanted with Edward. Life was going to suck. Bad.

It was very painful, and I cried almost every night because I missed them, but I shouldn't do this to myself. I _couldn't _do this to myself. I couldn't afford it. Not now. My grades weren't affected, but I was becoming depressed, and depression leads to being suicidal, and that would not end well. Let's just say I don't think the town would like it if the Chief's daughter suffered from loneliness and committed suicide. I really don't think Renee would like it, either.

So I made my way through the first two months in Forks High alone. I mean, Angela was there, but as I said previously, she's there, but at the same time she's not. It's not very helpful. I needed him. I needed him very much. I loved him now, and I told him to stop pursuing me, because I didn't like him.

It was lunch now, and I was sitting with Angela, trying and not succeeding at staring at Edward. I could see he was having a sort of conversation with Alice. Actually, it looked more like an argument. And Alice kept shooting glances my way. It made me paranoid.

I changed the song from _Love Story _to _Cold As You _because I was not in the mood to listen to happy love songs. Sad break up songs I could handle. I picked at my lunch while listening to music and glancing at the Cullen table once in a while. Look at me, calling it 'the Cullen table'. It was absurd of me to want to sit there. After all, I _did_ just call it their table. Suddenly, somehow Alice caught me looking at Edward, looked at him, smacked his arm, and whispered something in his ear. He shook his head and she smacked him again.

He nodded after she whispered one last thing and stood up slowly... and started walking in my direction... and I couldn't stop looking at him... Crap, what is he trying to do? He reached the table.

"Bella, can we please talk?" He asked. His expression surprised me. It wasn't angry, or shocked, it was hopeful, and sad.

I hadn't talked to him in two months. I was on a roll. I wouldn't do this. "What about?" What happened there? I said I wasn't going to freaking talk!

"I just want to ask you something. Can it be after school. It won't take long, I promise," he said.

And my resolve went away. I hadn't looked at him full in the face for two months, we hadn't spoken in two months. This was beyond what I wanted, but not what I needed. "Ok." Who controls my mouth!? Seriously!

He smiled and my internal war went away. "Thanks." He walked away and Angela looked surprised, but thankfully she said nothing, because I wasn't sure what happened there myself.

The bell rung and I made my way to class and sat down, but instead of taking my notebook out and getting my homework out like I did evey other day, I wrote a little note to Edward. It read: '_what do we have to talk about?_'. I put it on the side of his desk and waited impatiently until he got here. When he _finally_ did, he smiled at me. He sat down and read the note. He took his pencil out after setting his books down. He wrote something short on it. He passed it.

_'Nothing. I have to ask you something_.'

I looked at him questioninly. I got nothing except a smile, so I wrote on the paper again. _'What do you have to ask me? You COULD write it down here, you know_.' I passed it. He read it through and his smile widened. He wrote something on it as Mr. Banner asked for the homework. I got mine out and passed it to the front as Edward passed me the note. It read: _'can't tell you yet. I want to do it like a man, not a 5-year-old. plus you'd laugh. I'm afraid to do it. this isn't helping. I'm going to stop now_.'

Through the whole class, I was not only hyperaware of Edward, but I was also wondering about what he could possibly want to ask me. My mind came up blank. I didn't have a clue. I was still wondering when the bell rung. I hurried to my locker and got my Gym stuff and changed before the bell rung.

Now we were doing volleyball, and I was paired with tiny yet skilled Alice, and our opponents were Ashley Dowling and Lee Grandejean. They played well, and since I sucked on ice, we lost, but not by much, though. We lost 21-17. I think that's pretty good. Then class was over and I changed into my jeans, Converse, and my cream colored T-shirt. Then I got my things from my locker and put on my jacket and went to put my things in my car. Then I looked for Edward. He was near his car, which was a little closer to th doors than mine. He walked towards me. he got here and I looked up at him expectantly.

"I know you'll probably say no, but I can't help it." He took a deep breath and looked at me. "Would you go out with me?"

Crap. Man, I reall, _really _wanted to, but I couldn't. But I wanted to. I am going to do what my heart says for a change. "Yes. I'd love to." I smiled at him and the shock on his face. "What?"

"I really didn't expect you to say yes. After you said to leave you alone... well, I really didn't think you liked me, at all. Well, um..." He sounded flustered. "Well, we could go to dinner at this nice Italian restaurant in Port Angeles or something... I'll call you. See you later, Bella." He walked away as I smiled a small smile for my eyes only. I got in my car and drove home. I was too happy to notice anything else. I turned the news on when I got home. I sat there doing my Math homework, but I was too happy to notice the news. Something about Martin Bebeir, and something about his parents dying or something.

After some time, Edward called. We coordinated to go to that Italian place in Port Angeles on Friday and he'd come pick me up at six thirty. And then Alice grabbed the phone and said: "Oooh, Bella, I'll help you get ready! I'll come around four! No! I'll ride home with you!"

"Alice, I can get ready _by myself_!" I said.

"But with me you do a better job. I'm coming, and nothing in this world will stop me!"

"And what if I put a restraining order against you?" I challenged.

"That's a whole different thing... You wouldn't do that, would you?" She sounded sad.

"No, I'm just joking! You can come, but please don't go over board, and I am _NOT_ wearing heels!" I heard one last squeal before I hung up.

I cooked dinner and me and Charlie ate and I went to get ready for bed.

Half of me was distressed over this date. I mean, I just broke my promises. I promised I wasn't going to let a boy change me, but I went from ok to near-depression-to joyful in a small space of time. I promised I wasn't going to involve myself with the Cullens anymore but I was going to go on a date with the youngest son. I promised I would try to do my best in school, and yet even though my grades weren't falling behind, they were bound to soon, because I was going head over heels for Edward.

I need to get my priorities straight, man. Like, seriously.

I was so happy for this date, though, because I'd been pretty much obsessing over him for two months. I'd been observing, looking, learning, and loving him from affar, and I was tired of it. And this looked like that chance to let that happen.

I loved him and I was going to date him, and I was going to keep my grades up and my priorities straight. I don't know how, but I was going to.

I hoped this date was worth it.

* * *

**I suck at writing sadness and misery from a first person point of view. **

**Here's the thing from the Spanish test:**

**Instructions: 'Escriba un parrafo usando por lo menos tres adjetivos. El parrafo tiene que ser sobre una persona que tu quieres mucho.'- 'Write a paragraph using at least three adjectives. The paragraph must be about a person you care for very much.'**

**Paragraph: 'Voy a escribir de Alice Cullen. Fue la primera persona que me hablo cuando llegue a la escuela, y me invito a su casa. Somos buenas amigas, aunque ella es un poco hyperactiva. Como yo soy mas calmada, ella me ayuda a ser mas animada y a divertirme. Me gusta estar con Alice, y yo le caigo bien a su familia. Yo la quiero mucho, y por eso escribo sobre ella.'- 'I'm going to write about Alice Cullen. She was the first person to talk to me when I got to school, and she invited me to her home. We're good friends, even though she's a bit hyper. Since I'm calmer, she helps me be more animated and she helps me have fun. I like being with Alice, and her family likes me. I like her a lot, and that's why I write of her.'**

**Sorry that this chapter is so short.... I suck at writing misery.**


	11. Chapter 11

**Happy New Year, guys!!! Ok, please tell me if I suck at writing sadness, misery, depression, etc. I need to know. Also, I wore this short black sparkly dress to a party and it was the first time I wore actual high heels (Don't judge me, I'm only 13.) and my feet hurt like hell. Also, I saw this guy I hadn't seen since I was 9 and we'd only seen each other at the Harry Potter 7 book thing, so it wasn't exactly for a very long time, and he saw me that night and said I looked grown up and pretty. That coming from a guy you don't really know very well that is either finishing high school or already in college is a nice compliment. Plus he's kinda cute. I have to stop using this thing as a diary and start writing the actual chapter. Sorry, here goes. I don't think this chapter will be depressing...**

**BPOV:**

The rest of the week went by blissfully. I no longer sat alone at lunch, at least. Alice and Edward sat with me, and when I passed them in the hallway, I smiled, or waved. I gave Edward my special smiles, but I was still reluctant. I was breaking my promises willingly. I knew I should care more, but I couldn't bring myself to. It just wasn't important enough. It wasn't more important than my happiness.

So telling Charlie had been a bit awkward. When he got home the next day, he saw me and Edward sitting together watching Romeo and Juliet (for English class). Edward had dinner with us, and he left around seven fifteenish. I knew I had to tell Charlie, so: flashback:

"Um, Dad, there's something I have to tell you," I said.

"It's about him, isn't it?" He asked with a smile. He saw my bewildered expression. "Bella, honey, just because I don't say anything doesn't mean I don't _see_. You like him, don't you?"

I blushed but nodded anyways. "So, um, he asked me to go on a date with him yesterday. We're going to a restaurant in Port Angeles on Friday. Is that ok, Dad?"

"Is it what you want?"

What a horrible question to ask. It _was_ what I wanted, what my heart wanted. My brain said to quit playing high school girly-girl and get back to reality.

I really wanted this, and it felt like it was what I needed, but all of a sudden I wasn't so sure. I mean, I loved Edward, but I wasn't sure this was right. I _did_ want this, even if it wasn't what was best, and that answered my father's question. "Yes, Dad. It's exactly what I want."

I know it's horrible to play with his feelings, but I honestly wasn't trying. I didn't want to make Edward feel bad, and I didn't want to feel like a total monster, but sometimes I couldn't help but think that this wasn't what was best. Sometimes I wondered if this wasn't what was expected of me, and then Edward held my hand, or said my name, or caressed my cheek and I forgot all about it.

Alice was all for me dating Edward, and she wasn't hiding it. I swear, even the principal, Mr. Greene, noticed something was up with her.

How would he notice, you might ask? Well, Alice and I were in Gym, trying (and failing miserably) to play baseball. We were practicing swings when I hit the innocent girl that happened to be walking behind me. Coach Clapp yelled a bit at me and then sent a note to Mr. Greene to ask if I could be excused of taking Gym, and he told Alice and me to go and see him. He told us to change and if we came back to sit on the bleachers. I couldn't be happier about the whole thing, but I could see Lauren Mallory's silent laugher, which was clearly meant to humiliate me. It didn't, though, because I'd been a victim of that long enough to not let it get to me.

So Alice and I changed and went to Mr. Greene, and he read the note and asked me if I had any coordination problems. I said: "Sir, I'm not sick or anything. I'm just so clumsy that I'm almost disabled." At that, Alice beamed, and Mr. Greene laughed softly.

"So Miss Swan, you had no intentions of hitting Carrie Wright with that bat? Or Tyler Crowley with that spike? Or Jessica Stanley with that racket? Or Mariah Thompson with that... wait you hit her with a _shoe_? How did you do that?"

"I was trying to take my shoe off and it was stuck, so I kind of tried pulling at it and got off and flied across the room and hit her. I didn't mean to," I said, blushing. "But I had no intentions of doing any of those things."

"Well, I see. No offense, but I can also why Coach Clapp wants you out of class. Do you wish to be excused from Gym for the rest of your schooling here?" He asked.

"Um, well, I'm no good at Gym, and I usually inflict pain on myself and those around me, but, would I be able to graduate without Gym?" I asked.

"Well, you're a very bright girl, and I'm sure the teachers wouldn't mind if I let you slip. By any chance, is there a reason Miss Cullen is smiling so hard it looks like her face might brake?" He asked with a smile.

"She knows her brother and I are going on a date this Friday, and she's too happy about it… If you think about it, it's probably the reason she didn't tell me I was going to hit Rebecca Hess. She's more lost in fantasies about me and Edward than me," I said, blushing. I laughed a bit.

"Well, then that's none of my business. Miss Cullen?" He asked.

"Yes sir?" She said politely.

"Do you need to be taken out of Gym?"

"Well, I'm coordinated, and I can do sports, but Coach Clapp wants me out, too, so I don't know," she said.

"Please don't tell anyone, but Coach Clapp is the best Gym teacher the school has had in the last few years, and we want to keep him. I will give you two credit for the rest of this year and all of next year, because that would satisfy him, and we want him that way. Breathe a word of this and you are both back to Gym class. What you will do with your free period is sit and watch or do homework, or go to the library and do homework. Is that clear, girls?" We both nodded. "Good, now get back. The bell's about to ring."

We went back, but Alice had made it so clear that I'd had to confess, that I was blushing as we walked out.

It was Thursday, and Alice was going on and on about how the restaurant was so I would look for something appropriate to wear. She said it was semi-formal, so she said I had to wear a short dress. I just nodded and agreed without noticing what I was saying. She said she wasn't going to go overboard, but her overboard wasn't the same as mine, so I had to be careful what I agreed to at home. Edward and Angela were sitting with us, and Angela was thrilled that people were sitting with her. Alice said she wanted to meet the quiet girl Angela, and Edward followed her lead, so now Angela had two new friends. I was happy that she was happy, and she was happy, so that ended well.

I was just quite glad my grades weren't dropping, but then again I was still studying as much as I usually did. The only difference now was that when I didn't understand something, Edward helped me.

You're probably wondering if I still hang out with Jacob. Well, after that one time he came over, I called and tried to apologize, but he said: "You know, if you didn't want me over 'cause of your boyfriend, then you should've told me. You should've told me you had a boyfriend in the first place, ok? I don't know what's going on, but I still want to be friends, but tell a guy when you're already dating, k? You give a guy hope, and then you squash it. Anyway, I gotta go, my friend Quil and I are going to the beach. Later, Bells."

So, yeah, I wasn't hanging out with Jacob much. I only saw him when he came over with Billy, or when Charlie and I went down. So not that much.

"Bella! Have you been listening at all?" Alice's yell brought me back.

"Um, yes." I blushed.

"Oh yeah? What was the last thing I said?"

"Something about me wearing a short dress to the date?" I said.

"No! That was a long time ago! I was asking about what color you want your nails! Gosh!" Alice was bothering me now.

"Dude, chill. I don't want to paint my nails." The bell rung at exactly the right moment. "Besides, I have to get to class." I got up and dumped my tray and joined Edward and Angela at the door to walk to Biology. We walked in silence, and we entered the room in silence, unlike everyone else. I sat on my chair and Edward in his, and I took out my notebook. Something that had never happened before happened: Mike Newton approached me.

"Hi, I'm Mike. I wanted to know if you wanted to go on a date with me tonight. So, will you?" He said in a confident voice. He had the kind of face that said: "Dude, I've never been rejected, so my ego's through the roof."

"No. I have a date tomorrow, and I don't want to go with you," I said. I saw Jessica Stanley glaring daggers at me from across the room.

"Oh, well why can't you bail on your date and go have dinner at the bar with me?" He said haughtily.

"Oh really? Well, you wanna know what _I_ think?" I said. He nodded eagerly.

"I think it's good for you that you're getting rejected! I don't like you. I don't like bars. And I would _never_ 'bail on my date' for _you_. You're an insensitive, over-confident little ---." The bell ringing blocked the name I called him. He heard it, though, something I was glad for. Edward heard it, too, and he seemed surprised that I knew that kind of vocabulary. I chuckled.

Mr. Banner came in dragging a cart with a TV and DVD. A movie day. Yes!

We were watching something to do with cellular reproduction. I don't get why, because we were doing this topic for over two months now, and I think the class understood it quite clearly. But whatever, at least we weren't taking notes.

The movie played, but not many people watched. Mike fell asleep, Jessica started passing notes with a girl I didn't know, a blond started texting under her desk, and I watched inattentively. I glanced at Edward a few times, and he was always looking at me. I looked at Angela, and she was watching, but her head was held by her arm, and I'm sure she was as bored as the rest of the class. I just couldn't concentrate. We weren't getting homework, at least, but this left me to ponder and speculate (I just like using weird and odd and big words) about how the date would go.

I wasn't very shocked when the bell rang, because I'd been looking at the clock on the wall for ten minutes straight. I said goodbye to Edward and left for my locker to get my homework. Alice and I did our hardest homework in the Gym, because we were banned from class.

I sat and got a malicious glare from Lauren Mallory. I smiled at her teasingly. It was known she hated Gym class almost as much as not getting what she wanted. She turned and tapped a girl on the shoulder and whispered something in her ear. The girl, Kay Riddler, turned and they both glared at me. I snickered.

Alice arrived and sat next to me and smiled. I pointed and she looked and giggled. Just then, before Lauren and Kay could be any more amusing, Coach Clapp called attention and said to split up into two teams. I turned back to Alice.

"So what are you doing today, Ali?" I asked.

"Oh, just sketching something. I didn't have homework today," she said with a smile.

"I have Math." I concentrated on the twenty-five problems I had to solve. It wasn't hard, but it wasn't easy either. When I was done, I did the essay for Spanish class, which was on the different types of people, and the kind you thought you were.

I focused on people in school, and the kind I had been, the kind I am, the kind I will never be, and the kind I do not like. Lauren and Kay being in the latter category.

I was done in less time than I would have thought possible, so I looked over at what Alice was drawing. It was a very perfect heart, with vines weaving in and out of each other around the outside lines. Inside was a very detailed drawing of two faces looking at each other. I recognized my face, but she beautified it, she made me seem so beautiful, when I really wasn't. Then Edward's face. She drew almost to perfection, but she was missing a curve in his cheekbone, and the hair had to be a bit more tousled, and he was wearing red, something I knew as a fact he hated to use. Over our heads were the words: _You don't see yourselves clearly. You only see the other for who they are._ I gasped.

She caught me. "What are you doing!?" She said.

"I'm sorry!" I went back to my seat and checked if I had any more homework. Alice seemed really mad that I'd looked at her drawing, but why? She was really good. I mean, her drawing was extremely accurate.

I ignored it because there was no way to figure it out. There was no way to figure out the person that was Alice Cullen.

When the bell rang, I fled to my locker and grabbed my things. I went to my car and drove home. There, I finished a small Power Point project for English class about the book I read for a report and then walked to my wardrobe. I had to pick out what I was wearing for my date tomorrow. It was semi-formal, and Alice said a short dress would be essential. I did have a few short dresses, and I liked most of them, except the pink one mom had gotten me for my sixteenth birthday.

I had a blue one that Alice had gotten me on the sleepover so long ago. It was really pretty, and it was a dark blue, a color I loved. It was mysterious yet elegant, two qualities I loved. It had a round neck, with a line under the bust with beads in it. I tried it on and it ended a few inches above my knees. It looked amazing, and I was sure with Alice's make up and hair skills it would look even better.

I decided to wear it with a nice casual ivory cardigan that was loose and pretty. Let Alice be Alice, but I will wear it with what she would call "an old lady cardigan". By the time I was done, it was almost time for Charlie to be home. I cooked a quick dinner: pasta. I wasn't very fancy or gourmet, so it only took about twenty minutes.

Charlie got home and we ate in silence, until he asked: "So, you've got a date tomorrow, right?"

"Yeah, Dad. You don't mind Alice coming over to help me get ready, do you?" I asked.

"What do you mean 'help you get ready'?" He asked.

"I mean, she'll strap me to a chair and do my make up and hair. I'll go along with it, but just know it wasn't exactly my idea," I provided.

"Well, ok, then. What I was going to say was that I want you to be careful. I don't want you hurt, and I want you happy." He sat uncomfortably, as if wishing I wouldn't gush out my feelings about Edward, and say that I was going to be fine. As if.

"It's ok, Dad. Thanks," I said.

And that was it for conversation.

I went to bed and dreamt of the most romantic date with the best guy ever.

**

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**

What do you think? I thought it was ok, but it was just filler. I hate it when I just write filler, because I want something to happen. I'm sorry I haven't updated in so long, though, and it's because I had this idea and I don't want to post it. I'm tired of using the Twilight characters, so I'm using the Maximum Ride (by James Patterson) characters. It's about a girl that goes to a spy school and falls in love, but the slutty receptionist tries to get her expelled. If you want me to post it, please send me a message… Bye! Please review.

Also, a shout out to a story.

I don't do this, but I really like a whole lot of stories, and if you don't know about them, then think you'll like them.

1) If You were Mine- It's a Twilight fic, and it's very dramatic, (not to mention long. It took me 4 days to read it.), but it's REALLY good. I highly recommend it. It's already complete. It's on my favorites list…

The next update will have the next recommendation in the end.

Thanks for reading!


	12. Chapter 12

**I know all of you are expecting the date in this chapter, but I'm so very sorry that this is not going in the direction you expect. Let's just say I don't want to spoil it. Here goes:  
**

**BPOV:**

I woke up way too cheerful Friday morning, I even had a smile on my face. I didn't have any tests, I wouldn't be taking Gym, and I was going on my date with Edward. I was _way_ too excited to be good for any normal person. Lucky for me, I wasn't just any normal person. I was Bella Swan.

Bella Swan dressed in something Alice would like: I wore these white skinny jeans she's gotten me with a loose-yet-fitted deep blue sweater and my Converse. It was something she'd gotten me that sleepover, and it looked quite nice. I wore no make up, because 1) I didn't feel like putting it on, and 2) I'd get enough of _that_ later. Some people have been asking me how I can wear Converse in such cold temperatures. Easy, I'm mostly in heated areas, and when I'm not, I wear thick socks.

I ate hurriedly and went to school, eager to see Edward's crooked smile, Alice's approving gaze over my outfit, and Angela's encouraging smile for my date. I got out of my truck and walked over to Edward's Volvo, where Alice and Edward were waiting for me. I could see Rosalie with Emmett in the distance, and they looked like they were arguing, and Jasper was under the cafeteria's roof, looking at Alice, probably waiting for her. As I got to Edward, I could see he looked paler, his nose red, and his eyes bloodshot. He was sneezing and coughing a bit.

"Hey, guys. Edward, are you ok?" I asked.

"Yeah--- achooo!--- I'll be fine." Cue the cough. He shook his head at me.

"Let's get--- achoo!--- to class, ok?" He said.

We nodded and headed to the general direction of our lockers. Alice's was down the hall from mine, and Edward's was a little bit closer, in the other row. I noticed it was very quiet, and I glanced at Alice, because she wasn't talking. She looked worried. She kept glancing up at Edward every few seconds, and I could see from her expression she wasn't happy of his condition. "See you at lunch, guys," I said. I walked to my locker and grabbed my things for class, then got to the classroom and sat down. As I was walking down the hall, somebody stuck out their leg and I tripped and fell on all fours, my books, binder and notebook scattering everywhere. And as a plus, the floor was dirty, which made stains in the knees and legs of my _white_ jeans. I looked up and saw Lauren Mallory's sneering face. "Ooops, sorry. But you should really look where you're going, bitch," she said.

I mustered all the patience I'd learned and obtained in Phoenix and used it as I picked my books and things up and stood up and walked into the room. I could feel her glare, along with Jessica Stanley's and Rebecca Hess's. Nothing bothers a bully more than not affecting anyone.

After the bell rang, Mr. Mason walked in and gave Rachel Role some papers to hand out. He said: "These are your book reports. I have graded them, and I'm glad to say the lowest grade in the class was a C-, so you all passed. The Power Point presentations are due today, and I will have three people come and show them. These people please stand up in the order I call them." He took out a piece of paper and marked three names. At the same time I got my paper back. A hundred percent. An A+. I wasn't slipping. "Please come: Mike Newton, Bella Swan, and Joey Merchang."

I looked for my USB and stood up, then took my place next to Mike (gross). Mr. Mason motioned for me and Joey to move a bit and give Mike some space so he could do his presentation. He connected his USB to the big computer, which was hooked up to the TV and the words _Harry Potter and The Sorcerer's Stone_ flashed across the screen, followed by a picture of a very young Daniel Radcliffe mounted on his broom, wearing the Quidditch robes. "For my project, I read the first Harry Potter book. It tells the tale of young Harry Potter, who never thought he was special. He was always a flipping freak, but he never thought it was magic! So, anyway, after his cousin Dudley's birthday, letters start arriving, but he never gets to open them. The go to some island or something like that and his birthday comes and a big fat guy comes in and says: "Harry, yer a wizard." It's all really weird and then they go shopping for wizard school supplies, and then he goes to school and everybody thinks he's some big celebrity and all this crap---".

Mr. Mason stopped him. "Mike, did you even read the book?"

"No sir, I saw the movie." He sounded like he couldn't care less. I heard an intake of breath by Jessica in the front. I snickered.

"Well, you clearly don't understand the assignment. You had to read a book and analyze it. And the presentation was not telling us the story; you had to show the Theme, Plot Development, Characters, and Setting. You get a twenty for trying, I guess. You have to stop slacking or you won't be graduating next year, Newton." Mr. Mason made a note in his book. "Oh, by any chance, did you read the student handbook?" Mike shook his head. "Well, you're not supposed to cuss, or call bestselling characters 'flipping freaks'. You have a detention." He wrote a slip and passed it to Mike, who grinned and went back to his seat. "Bella, could you please do yours?"

I nodded and handed him my drive. He connected it and chose the file. The word _Tilight_ flashed across the screen, followed by the book cover. "I chose the book _Tilight_ for my project. The story is that a girl named Stella Massen moves in with her father, and she meets the mysterious Tullen family. She falls in love with the only single of all the boys of the family, Edmund, and she discovers his secret; he's a vampire. The main characters are Stella and Edmund. Stella is a very regular girl, in her eyes, but she's very selfless and caring. She's very smart and really witty, but she doesn't see herself very clearly at all." I clicked and a picture of the actress who would be playing Stella in the upcoming movies appeared, along with the description I just gave. I clicked again and the photo of the actor playing Edmund appeared with a description. "Edmund is very handsome, and at the start of the book, he's got black eyes because he's thirsty, but they turn gold when he's hunted. He's a vampire, and he was turned by his adoptive father in 1918, because he was dying of Spanish Influenza. He's got four adoptive siblings, and they are all vampires, but Edmund is the only mind-reader, though he can't read Stella's mind. Edmund's very selfless, and he falls in love for the first time with her, and he thinks he is not good enough for her. He thinks he's some monster, when he's not.

"They are both dynamic characters. Both because falling in love changes their outlook of the world. He changes and sees that their _is_ some good in him, and she changes and sees that maybe she finally found what she was looking for. The minor characters are Amy, Jackson, and Jeremy." **(Author's Note: Amy-Alice, Jackson-James, Jeremy-Jacob.)** "Amy is Edmund's sister, and she's the most supportive one. She's very small and beautiful, and she sees the future. She wants to be friends with Stella, and thanks to her Stella doesn't die. Jackson is a nomadic vampire that feeds the usual way; on human blood. The Tullens were playing soccer and Jackson and his coven, Vicky and Larry, interrupted and started hunting Stella. Jackson is described as average-looking, but very ambitious and fast. Then Jeremy is Stella's father's best friend's son. He's a Native American and he's the one that tells Stella that the Tullens are vampires, though he doesn't believe it himself. He's a bit younger than Stella, and he's funny, and cute, and he's very easy to be friends with, apparently. Amy and Jackson are dynamic characters because Amy changes when she meets Stella and wants to protect her, and Jackson looses at his hunting game and dies. Jeremy is static because even though he meets Stella, he really doesn't change."

As I talked about each character, a picture of the actor appeared on the screen. "It's set during January 2005, and it's in a very cold and rainy place, but it doesn't say where. The course of the whole book is the second semester of school. It takes place during Stella's junior year of school. The theme of the story, I think, is that you should never judge a book by it's cover. Stella looks more into Edmund and falls in love with him, something no one had ever done because he was different." At that moment, a still image of the movie appeared and the actors were lying in a sunlit meadow, and Edmund's skin was sparkling. I looked at Mr. Mason. "Sir, do I have to do the plot development? It's very long, and Joey hasn't gone yet."

"Miss Swan, please do, unless you want less points. We have more class time. Please continue."

I sighed and said: "It starts and you see how low Stella's self esteem is, and you see the mysterious Tullens for the first time. Then you see that Edmund is inexplicably hating Stella, then he's gone for a week, but when he comes back he's very polite. Then he saves her from a van that almost killed her and she suspects he's something, but when she confronts him about it, he just says she hit her head too hard and ignores her for six weeks. But during that time they're falling in live with each other, and after Mick, a guy from school, asks Stella out, Edmund can't take it anymore and they become friends. Then she goes on a beach trip and Jacob tells her Edmund's a vampire, but she decides it doesn't matter to her what he is, because she loves him too much. A few days later she tells him, and they hang out more, and then one day he takes her home to meet his family. There, Amy warns Edmund about Jackson's coven, who are nomads that are going to pass through. They go to play soccer, and halfway through the game, Jackson and his coven, Vicky and Larry, interrupt the game. They wanted to play, but then Jackson smelled Stella and started to hunt her. The whole family tries to protect her, and they end up taking her south, but a few days later Jackson calls saying to her that he has her mother and that if she doesn't give up, then her mother will pay the price. So of course, Stella goes to the meeting place and almost dies from loss of blood, plus Jackson bit her, so she'd turn into a vampire soon, too. But Edmund sucked the venom out and they took her to the hospital, telling her they fought Jackson and that he was dead.

"I think the climax is when Stella's all dizzy and can't see what's going on during the fight. You don't see the fight, but you know she could die right then, and it's very frustrating to have her nearly unconscious. The resolution is when they're in the hospital, where almost every inch of her body is bruised, but she's alive. Jackson is dead, and she will stay with Edmund and her father, and her mother is fine, because it was a trick, Jackson didn't have her. And then they go to prom and Edmund tells Stella he won't turn her because it's not how things should be." At that moment, a picture of the actors in the prom scene appeared, and the girl was leaning her neck back, and the boy was kissing it. "It's written by a new author called Stephanie Melendez, and it's very good. I highly recommend it." I finished. Everyone but Lauren, Jessica, and Mike clapped. I got my USB and went back to my seat.

The rest of the class was a blur, as was the rest of the day till lunch. I really didn't mind, because I really wanted to see Edward. When I got to the lunch table, however, only Alice and an extra tray were there. "Where is everyone?" I asked. By everyone, I meant Angela and Edward.

"Oh, Angela has Spanish with me, and she got sick, so she went home. Edward was here, but he had to go to the bathroom for a sec. He'll be here soon." I sat and started picking at the crap on my tray. "So, what are you wearing for the date?" She asked.

"Remember that dress you bought that one time? The blue one?" She nodded vigorously. "Well, that one with some flats, I think, and a cardigan." She pouted because of the cardigan, but whatever.

"Quick, here he comes! Tell me something that happened in class!" She whispered.

"Um, Mike Newton got told off by Mr. Mason?" I said.

"What? Finally! Wait, why?"

"Because he didn't read a book for an English assignment and he wasn't even doing the thing right. And he called Harry Potter a frigging freak, and that all this 'crap' happens... in front of Mr. Mason. And Mr. Mason loves Harry Potter. It was funny if you're not Jessica Stanley." We were laughing as Edward sat down, but he didn't ask us what about. He looked really worn out and tired. "Hey, Edward, are you ok?"

"Yeah, like I said, I'll be fine." I don't believe that.

"Are you sure you can go tonight? Cause we can go to dinner any other night," I said. He shook his head and said: "I am fine. We're going tonight." There was finality in his tone, and it made me feel weird, like he was forcing himself to go even if he was sick. I stopped talking about it because I really don't think I was going to get anywhere with him in that frame of mind.

We didn't speak much during lunch, except when Alice made me tell him about Mike in class. I was just glad that today was Friday... the last day of the school week... the day of my date..... the last day I'd see Lauren until Monday.... That brought back something someone said.

"Hey Edward, does Lauren Mallory have a crush on you?" I asked.

"I don't kno---." Alice stopped him. "Yes, she does. Why do you ask?"

"Because in class, Jessica Stanley told me, quote: 'Back off Edward Cullen, because he's Lauren's!' And I just found that really random," I said.

"Yeah, they think Edward's soooo in looooove with Lauren, when he's really---." And Edward put his hand over her mouth to cover whatever she was going to say. Okaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay. Odd. The bell rang and we made our way to Biology with Edward sneezing and coughing violently. I was worried, but we sat in our seat as usual.

Jessica called over: "Hey, Swan! Did you get Edward sick? Is that why no one likes you? Because you're so horrible you get people sick?" I ignored it, as usual. I reall couldn't care less what they thought.

Mr. Banner walked in with the TV again, but halfway through class Edward started coughing violently again, and Mr. Banner stopped the movie and said: "Mr. Cullen do you need to go to the nurses' office?" He nodded, got a pass and walked out, then Mr. Banner started the movie again. I was too worried to actually see anything.

After the bell I got my things and walked to Gym, where I met Alice. We talked about what make up she was going to use tonight, and about how funny Rebecca Hess looked when she tripped over Tyler Crowley's misplaced bat. Then something occurred to me.

"Alice, do you remember in lunch, when Edward covered your mouth? What were you going to say?" I asked.

She grinned and shook her head. "He texted me before I got here. I've sworn to secrecy. I'm sorry."

"Shoot," I muttered.

Gym was done and Alice went home with me while the rest of the family, (with the exception of Barbie), grinned at me. Edward smiled my favorite crooked smile as we pulled out. Then Alice hooked her iPod to my radio (I'd gotten one of those things installed) and played Miley Cyrus' new EP, _The Time Of Our Lives_. I liked _Kicking and Screaming_, which was odd, because I usually didn't like music where the singer screams. Then she changed it to Nick Jonas' _Who I Am_, and I got out what I was going to wear. She approved and told me to go take a shower, cleanse my pores and wash my hair. I did that and moisturized. I went back and she made me put on sweats, then she straightened my hair and divided my bangs in the middle and brushed to each side carefully. She curled my hair and let it fall naturally, then she told me to close my eyes.

She put on eyeshadow, mascara, and lipgloss. She didn't do much work because she said the dress did it all for me. When I opened my eyes, they had a slight outlining of pool blue, but the rest was sky blue, and the mascara looked elegant, and the rosy lipgloss she added was adorable, and it smelled like watermelon. She told me to put the clothes on and once I was done, she took a picture with her phone. Then she called Barbie to pick her up.

Barbie arrived ten minutes later, and Alice made me go outside for some reason. Once Barbie saw me, I was shocked. She was wearing sweats, a jacket and sneakers, yet she still looked amazing. She stared at me and smiled. "You really are right for my brother, aren't you?" She said.

"Wh-- what?" I stuttered.

"I'm sorry I've been so rude, but you really are good for him." She smiled at me and turned to Alice. "Esme wants us home in twenty minutes, so we have to go. Get in." She turned back and said goodbye to me, then got back in her flashy car. Alice hugged me, wished me luck, and said goodbye, then got in the car and left.

I still had about an hour until Edward got here, so I watched some TV. I surfed through the channels until something in Disney caught my eye. I know, totally lame for a seventeen year old girl to watch Disney, but I was bored. It was a JONAS episode, and Joe Jonas was being an idiot. I mean, it's so obvious he likes his stylist and best friend Stella, and yet he told her that she can go on a date with some idiot jock. Then she goes and he's all mad, and he goes to wreck the date, bringing Macy along. They fight and then Joe goes home. Stella and him talk and somehow they end up--- wait, was that a kiss?! Well, they kissed, and then she said: "I'll see you... tomorrow," and left. And then they went to school and said goodbye to go to class and kissed and Nick and Kevin are like: "Did we miss something?"

Then I went to make my bag and went back to the TV. They were playing a JONAS where Joe cancels on Stella several times, but then they go to a basketball game, even though he shouldn't because he's sick, and then they fight a bit cause he's so not ok with them dating, and they say they can't go down that road. It was exactly how I felt, but I knew that even if I shouldn't go down that road, I wanted to, to reason be damned, I'm sliding down.

I looked at my watch. Edward should be here by now; it was six forty-five. He was fifteen minutes late. I considered calling, but maybe he was stuck in trafic, or he was wearing something too casual for Alice and she told him to go change or something.

At seven I was getting worried.

At seven twenty-three I called his cell, but it was he didn't pick up, even though he knew it was me calling.

At eight I was in my room, in sweats, crying my eyes out. The phone rang several times, but I had no interest in talking to anyone, least of all Alice. Around ten, when I was going to open the window and feel fresh air on my face, when I saw a silver car around the driveway. I saw Jasper getting out, and I heard the doorbell ring impatiently, but I didn't bother answering the door. He would just say that Edward was sorry. And I didn't want to hear it.

I went to bed and cried some more, then I fell asleep and dreamed a horrible dream. I dreamed that after my schooling I was going to live alone, not even with cats, and I would die sad and alone, because Alice gave up on me. I woke up screaming into my pillow and cried.

And that's pretty much how I spent my weekend. I didn't have homework, and I didn't have any tests, and I really didn't feel like reading about Stella's pain over choosing Edmund or Jeremy. And I didn't feel like listening to Taylor Swift sing about meeting the perfect guy and feeling fearless with him. So I spent most of my time around the internet, going to youtube and watching WHATTHEBUCK show reviews that made me chuckle through tears.

I decided that since I had nothing to do except mope around, so I got my acoustic guitar and the sheet of paper where I'd written a new song two months ago and sat on the floor. I read the lyrics and started strumming tentatively, trying to see where they fit. I finally had something good.

I'm going to show you, and it's just like when I first wrote it.

_Before I fall too fast_  
_Kiss me quick, but make it last_  
_So I can see how badly this will hurt me_  
_When you say goodbye_

_Keep it sweet, keep it slow_  
_Let the future pass, and don't let go_  
_But tonight I could fall too soon _  
_Under this beautiful moonlight_

_But you're so hypnotizing,_  
_You've got me laughing while I sing,_  
_You've got me smiling in my sleep_  
_And I can see this unraveling,_  
_Your love is where I'm fallin' _  
_But please don't catch me_

_See this heart won't settle down,_  
_Like a child running scared from a clown_  
_I'm terrified of what you do,_  
_My stomach screams just when I look at you_

_Run far away,_  
_So I can breathe,_  
_Even though you're far from suffocating me_

_I can't set my hopes too high_  
'_Cause every 'Hello' ends with a 'Goodbye'_

_But you're so hypnotizing,_  
_You've got me laughing while I sing,_  
_You've got me smiling in my sleep_  
_And I can see this unraveling_  
_Your love is where I'm fallin'_  
_But please don't catch me_

_So now you see, while I'm scared,_  
_I can open up my heart without a care_  
_But here I go, it's what I feel_  
_And for the first time in my life I know it's real_

_But you're so hypnotizing,_  
_You've got me laughing while I sing,_  
_You've got me laughing in my sleep_

_And I can see this unraveling_  
_Your love is where I'm falling_  
_So please don't catch me_

_If this is love, please don't break me_  
_You don't love me, so don't catch me_

I was crying when I finished, but I'd changed the last line because it seemed more appropriate than the other line. I couldn't care less. I just wanted to never see him again.

This was what I'd needed to avoid. I was just as good as Casie from ninth grade. She'd gotten her hopes up that her crush would ask her to the dance, and he did, but he stood her up, and she'd been crying all weekend and that whole week in the stalls until he asked her out again, they went to the movies, and they lived happily ever after. But my happily ever after was gone. I wasn't sure it was even there. My Prince Charming did not come to take me away from the evil tower. He didn't come, despite his promises.

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**No Author's Note, except that you should review any questions or comments. Also, if you're on youtube, then Subscribe to clevvertv, because Dana and Joslyn said that after they get 100.000 subscribers they were going to do some Eclipse thing... Thank you for reading. Bye.**


	13. Chapter 13

**Before the chapter, a shout out to my best friend! She sent me a song, (According to You by Orianthi), and it made me realize just because one boy says I'm aggressive, ugly, and a Twilight freak, and too much of a nerd, it doesn't mean another boy won't think that I can defend myself, that I'm cute and that Twilight is ok, and that being smart is a virtue, and not something I do for a living, because trust me, no one pays me to get straight As. This chapter will also start off depressing. I'm so very sorry. I start school tomorrow, so it'll take me longer to update.

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**BPOV:**

_Life sucks, and then you die. Yeah, I should be so lucky._ I'd already read _Crack of Dawn_, but the quote still stuck with me. My life did suck. I live my whole seventeen years without interference from strangers, I come here, and my life turns into a mess thanks to one family. One person, I could say. I was depressed, but I didn't let it show, because it would hurt my father.

I wrote the song and recorded it on my laptop, but then I had nothing else to do. I was bored. I was miserable. And the only person I wanted to talk to had made me this way. Edward hurt me. And this is just what I knew would happen, but didn't believe it. I'd been so care-free and happy I'd ignored the writing on the wall. Edward was too good for someone like me. Someone average. Someone who's goal in life was to graduate high school with good grades, get a scholarship and go to college, then work either as an English teacher or writing books.

Edward could have any girl he wanted. He could have Jessica Stanley, Rebecca Hess, Lauren Mallory, and even Taylor Swift, I'd bet. He was the perfect guy any girl could want. Maybe he'd realized that and gone on a hot date, leaving me, boring Bella, behind. It made me feel like.... I don't know, it made me feel worthless to think he thought I was boring and dull and average. I knew I was, but it hurt to hear it from someone as special to me as he was.

It was time to get up for school, but I was determined to not let it show that he hurt me. I'd go cry in the bathroom when I get home, but in school I was going to play the -I-don't-give-a-damn-if-you-went-out-with-Lauren-Mallory card. So I dressed in something cute and nice for me, grabbed my bag and walked out the door. I'd packed cereal in bag, so I ate it on the way to school.

It was cold today; maybe forty degrees. I was wearing my coat and a scarf, but I thought that was just me. Everyone was wearing coats and scarfs, and Rebecca Hess was wearing a beanie and gloves. Whoa. I got out of the truck and immediately, there was a Pixie next to me. She was wearing a white coat, which looked even brighter next to mine, which was black.

"Bella, I need to tell you something!" Alice said.

"I don't want to hear it, Alice," I said. I began walking toward the school. Alice skipped behind me, and ran a bit to catch up.

"But Bella, it's about Friday! Why Edward didn't show up!" I turned to her suddenly and she stopped once she saw the look on my face.

"Alice, I said I don't care! Ok? I don't care if he went with some girl to a club, or if he was watching TV and forgot, but I want you and your family to _leave me alone_! Since I got here and met you, my life has been a roller coaster, and I don't want it! If that's how you like it, then fine! But not me! I don't want to be with a bi-polar guy, who one day says he wants to go on a date with you, and the next he bails! Just leave me alone!" I yelled at her. I walked quickly back to my locker before anyone could see the tears in my eyes.

I went to class, and again, Lauren and Rebecca tried to trip me, but this time I just used the other door. I sat in the back and watched everyone do their projects. After class, I walked to my next class and copied the notes. Then in Math I handed in the homework and did the new work. Then in Spanish I did the work and doodled on the back of my notebook. After I drew an eye, and a very carefully sculpted apple, I got bored. Then was lunch.

Angela would be asking me for details about the date, and Alice and Edward probably wouldn't sit there today, but that table was directly in front of ours, so they could still stare at me all they wanted. I settled for a table at the farthest end of the room, so hopefully they couldn't see. Maybe, if Alice didn't tell, they'd think I was sick. But that wouldn't work, because I had Biology with... Edward next. Oh well. I ate my lunch, blasting my iPod. I was back to sad songs again. Why, oh, why was I so sensitive and prone to depression? I mean, lots of girls get dumped by their boyfriends. I'm the only one who gets into a depression to this level by someone she didn't even go out with. It's sad, really.

I was longing for the bell to ring for two reasons. One, I wanted lunch to be over, because I was getting sick and tired of Taylor Swift singing _White Horse_. Second, for some reason I tried to ignore and squish, I wanted to see Edward. I didn't want to want to see Edward. It was unhealthy for me to want to see him. It would hurt. And it sucked worse to know that we'd be doing a group project, (you know, the baby project?), together. They were going to give us the frigging baby today.

The bell finally rang and I got up and made my way, tripping and stumbling, to Biology. I sat in my chair and looked anywhere but the door. I settled for the closed window. It was clear, so I could see outside. I normally wouldn't be able to see because Edward was so much bigger than me that he blocked my view, but he wasn't here yet, so I could see. It was a gray sky, and there was a lot of howling wind. The trees in the forest nearby were being thrashed around by it. It made me think of me.

I was being manipulated by Edward. Every time he did something hurtful, I would fall to pieces. Every time he said something sweet, I would be happy. It was sick and twisted. I hated being manipulated. I would state once again how this was exactly what I'd been wanting to avoid, but you've heard this all before.

The bell rang and I was still seeing clearly out the window. Edward wasn't here. Mr. Banner called to attention and began his lecture. It was all I could do to not zone out and end up with detention, so I listened.

"... all know we're doing the baby project. I do this with every junior class I have, because possibly soon you'll be faced with a baby and I want you to be prepared. I started this when a girl in a junior class got pregnant almost twenty years ago. The school let her attend, until it was impossible. So I wanted to show you what's it's like to have a baby, to an extent. The baby will have a camera in it's eyes, and it will cry and ask for food regularly. You need to bathe it twice a day or more, and you do have to take it to school. Only people with the three last periods with me will do this. The others will have it the next semester. You can only get a babysitter for two hours, and they have to sign a paper. If you have too many babysitters, then that takes points off. This will last for three weeks. Now one person from each group come up and collect your baby. You may choose the name, and if it's a girl or boy. Please come up now," he said. I got up and took a baby. It had mud brown eyes with a little lense inside. It's cheeks were flushed, and the lips were a cream pink. The skin was a creamy color, and it had a full-body suit. It was yellow, so you could dress it up and give it a gender.

It was a girl. Her name was Edella Gabby, I decided. Let Edward think what he wants, but this was our project, and he was absent, so I got to name it.

Twenty minutes later we were watching the rest of the movie from last week, because Mr. Banner wanted to concentrate on this project, so we'd get movies during class. Ten minutes later, the door opened and a pale Edward, looking flustered came in. "Sorry, sir. I got sick; I was in the nurses' office." He handed Mr. Banner a pass.

"Go sit, Mr. Cullen," he said. Edward came and saw the doll in my arms. He took out a paper and wrote on it, then passed it. I tried to ignore it, but he kept poking my arm, so I glared at him for a little while. He pointed at the paper and I hesitantly took it and opened it.

'_Why are you so mad? P.S. What's it's name?_' I sighed and ignored the first question. '_She's Edella Gabby. Obviously a girl. I'm going to get her a blue dress I have, so don't worry. You watch her every other day._' I passed it and saw his face fall. '_Why won't you answer my first question?_' the note said once I got it back. I didn't respond. I ignored it.

When the bell rang, I meant to make a quick escape, but Edward caught my arm and held me back. I almost dropped Edella. "Hey!" I said.

"Why won't you tell me what's going on?" He asked in an angry voice.

"Because, nothing _is_ going on. Go back to your life and let me live mine. Just stop hurting me. This was exactly what I had wanted to avoid, and you make it so hard! Just let go! I need to get to class," I said. His grip slackened and I walked off. When I was halfway down the hall, I looked back. He was on his way to the Spanish classroom, which was the way I was going. I stopped at my locker and looked at him. His face betrayed nothing, but his eyes showed hurt and confusion. I turned back and got my homework and bag, plus a little notebook to write in. I was closing my locker when a someone tapped me on the shoulder. I turned.

"What do you want?" I asked.

"I just want to let you know I got sick. I wasn't feeling well, and I know I should have called, but Alice told me she would, and I fell asleep---" The bell rang.

"Great, you made me late for class! Goodbye, Edward!" I ran to the Gym with Edella in my arms and left him standing there. Nothing could make me feel worse.

I felt horrible for what I had done. I was not only hurting myself with my decision, but Edward too. It was a bad way all around.

I made it to Gym when some girls were still changing. My luck. Poeple were staring because of the doll in my arms. Again, my luck. So I ignored it and went outside and sat on the bleachers, only to find Alice wasn't there. She was in her normal clothes talking to Coach Clapp. I wondered what that was about.

I sat and started on my homework, only to find I didn't have any, except write a five page story that was appropriate. I got my notebook of ideas and went through them. **(Author's Note: These are my actual ideas. Tell me what you think.)**

There was that one where the girl is a teenage novelist, and she meets a boy and falls for him, and she writes a book in diary format and publishes it, even writing his name. Or the one where the boy bets he can get the lonely girl to go with him to the dance. Or that one where the girl sees the boy that one time and thinks it's a once in a lifetime thing, but then he goes to her school to try and win her heart. Or the one when--- wait, why is Alice holding a bat?!

I looked up and saw Alice swinging the bat, hitting the ball perfectly, and Lauren and Rebecca cheering. As realization hit me, Edella hit the seat.

So Alice had switched to Gym class. And the popular girls were cheering for her. I can read the signs. Obviously, Alice could be friends with anyone, and Lauren and Rebecca were no exception, and Lauren probably thought that if she got close to Alice, she'd get invited home and could get a chance to ask Edward out. And Rebecca probably just thought it would be dumb to not take the opportunity of knowing a Cullen.

I glanced up again to pick up Edella, and as Alice got to third base, she looked up at me. She didn't scowl or glare, but she didn't wave or smile either. It was like she was being cautious with me because I said to leave me alone. I smiled a bit, but I don't think she saw it; she was looking intently at Galvin McCall, who was batting now.

Correction, _now_ nothing could make me feel worse. Why did life suck so bad for me?

I got through the period thinking about how to write the one where the boy bets he can get the girl, all the while not able to concentrate. I mean, I knew I wasn't exactly very nice to Alice, but I never thought she would actually go back to class. It was the only class we had together, and I really did like Alice. I felt a little tear drop as I noticed how thoroughly I had destroyed my happiness. I put limits for myself that when it comes to it I don't want to follow. I work myself too hard. I push away the ones I should've held close. I was a monster. I'd read books that were in first person where the main character falls in love, but I never really understood how strong that could be. I destroyed all I wanted, and I was still doing it.

I wanted Edward. I wanted Alice to be my friend. I wanted to be with my mother so she could help me. I wanted my father to be more open so I could talk about this. I wanted to let myself love Edward.

That's when it hit me. I could keep some of my promises. I could still study hard, and I could be with Edward. I texted him to meet me near my car after school. After about five minutes my phone buzzed. I opened it and saw his message. _U got me in trobl with Goff. Wat do u want? -e _

I wrote back _I want 2 talk 2 u. please go. I need 2 talk. -b _and pressed send. Within fifty seconds I got _kk- e_. I laughed as the bell rung.

I walked out and caught up with Alice. She was walking faster, to get away from me I assume, so I ran and caught her arm with the one that wasn't holding Edella. "Swan, let go!" She yelled. I held her arm until she looked at me. Her eyes showed how exasperated she was. "What do you want?"

"I want to be your friend, Cullen," I said. She rolled her eyes.

"Are you frickin serious? Just this morning you said to leave you alone. Are you insane? I mean, seriously, you tell me you want to be friends, then you ignore me like a pariah, then you're my friend for a week, and then you say to leave you the freak alone, and now you want my friendship again? Are you bipolar? Why don't _you_ just leave _me_ alone? I wanted to be your friend, but then you showed me why loners are loners. You can't sustain a friendship, but Lauren and Becca can, so they're going to be my friends now. Rose likes them, too, so you can go back to where you came from; where friendship and trust and love don't matter!" With that she wrenched away and went into the locker room.

Those words cut through my heart like daggers. Every word she said was like a knife through my heart. How could I have done this? How could I have lost the only friend I ever had because of something as silly as a boy? Which reminds me… he's probably waiting outside my truck in the cold.

I hurried out despite the tears that were welling up in my eyes. Rebecca and Lauren were snickering, and I knew that Alice's little speech hadn't just been heard by me.

I got to my truck in record time, seeing as I ran. I stumbled a few times, but luckily I didn't actually fall. As I got to my truck, I saw Edward leaning against the hood. He propped himself up and smiled at me. Then he saw the tears in my eyes, and he scowled. "Who's butt am I kicking, Bells?" **(Author's Note: That's actually a bumper sticker on face-book. It says: 'I want the guy who I can run into his arms crying and the first thing he'll say is "who's ass am I kicking, babe?"'. I have it.)**

"No one's. And only my dad gets to call me that. I didn't mean for you to see me crying; I just… it was impossible not to. Alice just… Anyway, I wanted to talk to you about something-- actually, I need to ask you this first. Why didn't you show up on Friday?"

He hesitated. "I was sick. It wasn't just a little cold. It was a very powerful virus that could be fatal if we didn't treat it right. I wasn't supposed to go outside, I had to be in a temperature-controlled room, I couldn't touch things that I'd touched before, like my phone, because it was all being cleaned. And I wasn't supposed to talk, either. I had Alice call a couple of times, and Jasper volunteered to come, but you never answered. I'm sorry," he said.

"No, _I'm_ sorry. I thought you'd just stood me up and went off with Lauren Mallory or something. _I_ didn't answer, _I_ was stubborn. It's _my_ fault," I said.

"Why don't we go home and you tell me why you were crying?" He suggested. I nodded helplessly and he hugged me around the shoulders to his chest. It felt good, especially with what Alice had said.

He went back to his family to give them the keys to the car and to tell them what happened and then came back. I was looking, and I swear Rosalie glared at Lauren Mallory and Rebecca Hess as they passed by on their way to their car, and Alice looked distraught after what Edward told them. She was probably sad I was spending time with her brother.

We got in my car and he drove to my house. There, we set our school stuff in my messy room and went to sit on the downstairs couch. (I left Edella tucked in bed.) I snuggled into him unconsciously and shivered. The Chief always wore a jacket inside the house; but I didn't, and it was inhumanly cold outside, (in my opinion), and I'd removed my jacket so all I had were my clothes and hoodie. Not much.

He suddenly pulled the quilt Charlie kept there over me, so I'd be warmer, and he shifted so I could still be against his chest while he looked at me. "Bella, what's wrong?"

What wasn't wrong? "Well, I--I… I ruin everything. Alice just… well, she said some things… that were hard for me… that's all." It was hard to talk because I was shaking from remembering it. Seeing the hate in her eyes and hearing the venom in her voice. It was excruciating.

He rubbed his hand against my back and held me tight, and it felt nice, natural. I never wanted it to stop, but unfortunately, my body thought otherwise. I stopped shaking and controlled my breathing within twelve and a half minutes. And then he stopped rubbing my back, but kept me tight.

I looked up. His face showed what he didn't say. He was mad at Alice for putting me through this pain, he was sorry he missed our date, he was sad I was sad, and his face showed something I didn't understand. He looked into my eyes and it was as if the last two months hadn't happened. I forgot all the pain I'd felt because of the not-date, and the two months because of the thing with Jacob, and it was as if yesterday had been Alice's sleepover, and our first kiss, _my _first kiss, and as if nothing had changed since we met. I felt wonderful; like life was giving me a second chance with him. A slow smile broke through my lips and he smiled too. And I lifted my head… tilted it… and kissed him…

And he kissed me back, and it was wonderful. In this moment, I did not care about the promise I made, or the fact that Alice probably hates me, or that my father could walk in any second and see me kissing him. I just felt so happy.

As we broke apart, he smiled, but something in my eyes made his smile fade. He started to get up and pulled me along with him.

"What?" I asked.

"Call Chief Swan; I'm taking you to dinner," he said.

"But I'm not dressed up, and it's Monday," I complained uselessly.

He smiled. "It doesn't matter. We'll be back early." I gave up and took out my phone.

"Hey, Dad?" I asked after he picked up.

"Yeah, Bells?"

"Can I go to dinner with Edward?" I asked.

"Sure, you go over to the Cullens' place whenever you want, hon," he said.

"No, Dad, as in like a date."

"Oh, well, be back by eight," he said in his serious voice.

"Sure chief!" I did the whole Army hand to forehead salute thing and Edward laughed. "Dad, I saluted you like in the Army." He laughed. "We'll be back, ok? Bye, I love you."

"I love you, too, kid." He hung up. I turned to Edward. "We have to be back by eight," I reported. He nodded and grabbed his coat. I got mine, wrapped Edella in a blanket, and grabbed a bag, then followed him out to my car. He shook his head and said: "I don't want to drive this. Do you mind if we go to my house and get mine?"

"Oh, whatever, but this truck runs fine, thank you very much," I said, playfully mad. He laughed and started my truck.

We drove in silence, with me in the front seat holding the baby, and up until I saw his driveway I wasn't feeling insecure or anxious or anything. Then I saw Alice sitting on the steps drinking out of a steaming cup. She looked up and saw me and hurried to get inside. I guessed she didn't want to see me. Edward shook his head, and got out. I started to unbuckle my seatbelt and opened my door, seeing he was outside, and followed him to a building of the house I hadn't seen. He put I a code (1901) and the doors opened. A garage. There were some really freaking flashy cars in here. A red convertible, a big Jeep, an Aston Martin, a Mercedes, a yellow Porsche, and Edward's silver Volvo. Instead of heading toward the Volvo, he walked up to the Aston Martin and ran his hand through the hood proudly. "This is my second baby. It's my special occasion car. You like it?" He looked hopeful.

"It's very… shiny. I like it," I said. Thankfully, instead of turning it on, he walked over to the Volvo, but before I could reach it, someone called my name. And it wasn't Edward.

"What do you want, Cullen?" I asked.

"I just wanted you to know I'm--" she started.

"You're what? Sorry? You meant every word you said. I could see it in your eyes, Alice," I said coldly.

"Wait! You don't understand! Please listen." I turned to her impatiently. "Thank you. Ok, what happened was that Rose is so mad at Becca and Lauren and Jessica and girls like that treating you that way that she asked me to be friends with them to find out their weaknesses and just get back at them. And as those bitches initiation was that to tell you we weren't friends anymore I had to do it in the most hurtful way possible. I hated every second of it, but I'm a good actress, Bella, I have to be. I never meant any of those things."

I couldn't believe it. "Are you serious? You made me freaking cry, Ali! You could have at least texted me!" I didn't believe this. "I don't believe this. I'm not that stupid." I got inside the car. She ran and held the door open.

"Do you think I'm lying?" I nodded. _Le-duh!_ a voice in my head said. "Well, I'm not. I just want to get back at them for you. Edward's in on it, too. He's going to help by going on a date with Lauren and being the idiot he's not. And we'll be video taping so we can watch Lauren try to be hot." She giggled and I couldn't help it; I giggled too.

"Bella, I thought you'd be against this! How could you?! I trusted you!" Edward whined. That made me laugh harder.

"It's….. going to be….. Too funny….. To watch…. Sorry," I said between laughs. He pouted. "I forgive you, Alice. I'm sorry for what I said this morning. Friends again?"

She held out her pinky and I wrapped mine around it and we laughed. "Friends now and forever."

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So what do you think? I wrote half of it on the website and half of it on my laptop after my History homework was done while listening to _When I Look At You _by Miley Cyrus. My mom won't let my use the Mac, so yeah. Tell me what you think and if you want me to skip the date and go to how everything is like I did after the thing with Jacob, or if you want me to run you through the date and the first day after they go out at school, and then skip. Personally, I want to skip the whole thing and keep it under wraps until after a little while. By the way, if you think this is going to end soon, well, there are still some things missing, and I'm going to need a whole lot of filler. Anyway, review please. Also, as I probably said above, if you have a you tube account, please subscribe for clevverTV, because once they get 100.000 subscribers, they're going to be doing Eclipse chapter recaps. Thank you.


	14. Chapter 14

**Guys, thank you for reviewing. I'm not going to put this on hold, (because 1- I don't actually want to do that, and 2- I really want to write Lauren trying to be hot), but I'm going to put it on trial. What I mean is, you will get three more chapters, and if I get at least ten reviews per chapter, then the story will go on, but if not, then I'm taking it down, finishing it, taking it to my teacher as extra credit, and then publishing (with other names and places obviously). So yeah. On another note, is anyone as stoked as I am for _Valentine's Day_? The movie, not the holiday. Because I have no special someone yo spend it with. Seriously. Anyway, I'm also writing a chapter for the other story, so I'm probably going to take a while. And anyone who has read my other stories knows that I like frequent reviews, and I will stop writing if I have to. And I'll put ice water down a guy's shirt if he says that I wish I was dating Robert Pattinson or Kevin Jonas. I will do both of those. Yeah, I'm that willing.

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**BPOV:**

Our date was nice. He took me to a small restaurant that wasn't packed and we talked. The waitress was freaking flirting and he didn't even notice. Don't ask me how I know, because I asked. But, aside from that, we talked about nothing and everything. We talked about what we could do for the upcoming movie release of a movie I wanted to see, how he was doing in Spanish, and then the waitress said: "Hey, here's my number-- I mean, the bill," and I rolled my eyes. He hadn't asked for the bill. I pointed this out and she walked off with the little folder. And then we spoke in Spanish so she wouldn't understand. **(It will be traduced in BOLD after what they say.)**

"Y a donde vas a llevar a Lauren cuando salgas con ella?" I asked. **And where are you taking Lauren when you go on a date with her?**

"A un restaurante barato, como Burger King o McDonald's. Solo para molestarla, porque todo el mundo sabe como ella es con sus dietas," he said through some laughter. **Any cheap restaurant, like Burger King or McDonald's, just to bug her, because everybody knows how she is with her diets.**

I laughed. "Y ella te gusta?" **And do you like her?**

He put on a disgusted face. "Pal' carajo que no!" **Hell, no!**

"Por que? Ella es hermosa y tiene estilo, y es popular, y tiene la mitad de los chicos en la escuela detras de ella," I argued. **Why not? She's beautiful, and she's got style, and she's popular, and she's got half the guys in school after her.**

"But you're beautiful too, you just don't see it." He sighed. "You're so smart and witty and beautiful and just amazing, and yet you don't see it. And Lauren is _not_ beautiful," he added with a laugh. I laughed too. "Hey, do you want dessert?"

"Sure, but no cherry, just chocolate!" I whisper-yelled. He laughed and called the waitress up and ordered chocolate cake. Twelve minutes later, after an intense war of who could talk faster in Spanish, the waitress brought a brownie-sized lump of chocolate with chocolate syrup and a cherry on top. I thanked her and took a tentative bite-- and almost spit it out.

"This tastes like crap! God, I think she spiked it. Let's go," I whisper-yelled. He chuckled but got up anyways. I got up too and grabbed Edella, and then we walked to the counter. He took out a credit card and put a pin, then signed the receipt and we got in the car before the slut-- I mean waitress!-- could do anything else.

We drove listening to Taylor Swift music and ended up talking about how bad we wanted to see her and rumored boyfriend Taylor Lautner's new movie. Why, oh, why do we get off topic so easily? It's so weird. Anyway, he drove me home and we got there quite early, so we turned on the TV. I know you're going to think I'm BEYOND childish when I say this, but I turned on Nickelodeon. iCarly was on, and I freaking loved that show, so yeah. Edward looked at me weird when I laughed at Sam saying 'crap'. I mean, it's a show on a kid's channel, so the fact that they get away with that is odd. Then again, they say suckish too, so they have power. Ooooh, I'm so bored.

Gosh, I have got to do something else. So I walked to my room and opened my laptop. I checked my e-mail and replied to my mother's very distressed letter about her not finding the pink blouse that goes with the light blue jeans. I then turned to the music section in my computer and found the song I'd recorded. Edward was reading my stuff over my shoulder, not that I minded, but this was waaaaaaaay more personal than telling my mom she donated that shirt to a church years ago because her chest looked bad in it. I quickly closed the window and opened my favorite search engine. I typed in one word: _werewolf_. It gave me everything from movies to pictures of Taylor Lautner to stupid things like people saying: "Hey, I'm a werewolf just like Jeremy!!!!" to a JONAS episode where Joe pops out with a 'scary' werewolf mask. I watched that episode, and I knew he would do something like that, and it should have been scary, but I laughed so hard.

"Why search werewolves?" Edward asked.

"Werewolves are cool," I said absentmindedly.

"Don't you like vampires?" He asked.

"Yeah, but to me they're not actually that interesting. I like dogs, and werewolves are the closest thing." I chuckled.

"Wait, aren't you on the vampire's side in the _Tilight _books?" I nodded. "Then why do you like werewolves more?"

"Because. I like the vamp dude so much, but not the fact that he's a vampire. He could be a normal human boy and he'd still be my favorite, but I like werewolves. I'm not team werewolf, but I'm not team vampire either," I said.

He shook his head and looked at his watch. "I should probably get home." I put my laptop on the table and stood up as he did. He grabbed coat and walked to the doorway, where he turned to look at me. His eyes burned into mine with such feeling that I felt my insides turn to jelly. He leaned down the same time I leaned up. Our foreheads somehow collided. "OW!" I squealed. "Crap!" I didn't want to squeal.

We both rubbed our foreheads, and all the while Edward was looking at me strangely. "What?" I asked as I removed my hand from my face.

"You squealed 'ow' and then you yelled 'crap'?" He stated.

"Yeah, and?"

"Well... just... Oh, whatever." He shook his head and then came closer to me. He held up his forefinger. I looked at him questioningly. "Stay very still." I tried, but my arm twitched. "Don't move." I tried, and this time, it worked. He leaned down slowly, oh so very slowly, and his lips met mine. Our lips moved in perfect synchronization, and I felt a flying joy as his arms came around my waist and mine around his neck. And he leaned back and smiled, but again I could see something dim his eyes before he shielded them. It saddened me. I didn't want him to hurt. And I was probably the one making the hurt.

He walked out and got in his car and drove off. And about five seconds after the car disappeared from my view, I realized I missed him. Wow, I'm turning into such a girl.

I shook my head and closed the door, then turned and walked to my room. I plopped down on the bed and thought about Forks.

Rainy, rainy Forks. Green Forks. Small Forks. Forks that was driving my life insane! You know, every time I say or think 'Forks', I end up picturing a silver fork, like the one used for dinner. And I can't help but laugh because I'm thinking silverware is pretty much controlling my life. I bet you're laughing too! See, I can see the future. Ha ha!

After I thought about it, a realization hit me as hard as Kanye West on Taylor Swift. I'm thinking this place is the one that's bonkers, but really it's me. I've always more or less lived in my own little bubble. I haven't been ignorant to everything that's going on, but that's not the kind of bubble I'm talking about. You know, when you live in your own little world and everything is perfect? That's not the kind of bubble I was in. My bubble was _my_ world. I was living in a world where I took for granted that my life plan would go smoothly because I would never fall in love. I believed that to be a fact, not a possibility, and that was because I had made it that way in my bubble. It was the reason I had isolated myself. So I could ignore the rest and continue in my life.

And I realized right now how completely sick and wrong and twisted it was.

I mean, we all live in our own little world at some point. Mine was a life plan, but maybe Rosalie's was that she was so beautiful that no one else was beautiful, or Alice's that every girl had heels and make up in their closets, or Angela's that she was nobody and no one would want her. Ok, I'm making this get depressing. Sorry. Anyway, I know now that I live in the real world. And as soon as I realized it, my bubbled popped. I felt so relieved.

(This doesn't mean I break my promises. It just means I won't try to come between Edward and me anymore.)

I somehow fell asleep and woke up to my alarm the next morning. How I fell asleep? I don't have an answer to that. How my Converse shoes came off? No answer. How I have a blanket on me? Nada.I should ask Charlie about that. Really.

I shut off the alarm and got up. I made my way to the bathroom and desperately tried to untangle my hair. It didn't work. And I didn't have time to wash it and dry it unless I wanted to die of hypothermia. Yeah, it was that cold. So I decided to take a shower and wear my normal jeans and Converse and a brown and green sweater. And my hair was still a mess, so I tied it in a high ponytail.

I grabbed a quick granola bar as breakfast and drank the orange juice from the carton. I was so late that Charlie was gone. I felt like such a girly girl. I took too much freaking time in working with my hair. I grabbed my bag and coat and headed out.

It was misty. I headed out to my truck and bumped into a car I had not seen. A silver car. And I saw Edward get out. I heard his laugh before I saw him. He came over and said: "Did you not see my car? It's been here for _some _time."

I laughed and muttered: "Why are you here?"

"I can't take you to school?" He said sarcastically.

I giggled and let myself be hugged. Then I shivered. "Dude, I'm cold." He disentangled himself and lead me to the car. He opened my door and I got in. He closed it and went inside, then we drove off to school. He drove so much faster than me in the truck that I bet that when we got there I wouldn't even be late.

"Where's your family?" I asked.

"Rosalie's driving. I wanted to drive you today," he said. He frowned. "Lauren came over yesterday."

"What?" I asked.

"She just called Alice and five minutes later walked in and sat on the couch and they started whispering and giggling. Alice was totally faking it, but it was so unnerving to see them like that. And then I went up to my room and talked to Jasper and she came in and sat down. We stopped talking and she was like: 'Oh, don't mind me. I'm just here to ask you something, _Eddikins_.' Jasper scoffed and left and I could practically feel his laughter. She sat next to me and whispered in my ear if I would go on a date with her." He stopped and hesitated. Then he continued. "I said I would think about it and she smiled and left.

"Alice encouraged her. I pretty much pounded her later. Anyway, what did you do last night?" He finished.

"I think I fell asleep," I said.

I expected him to say something like: "No chiz, Sherlock." Or: "You don't say? I think I did, too." Or something sarcastic, but he only laughed a little bit and shook his head. "You didn't even put on pajamas or anything?"

"I'm telling you; all I remember is thinking a lot of stuff and then hearing _Brick By Boring Brick _by Paramore," I insisted playfully, trying to look like a toddler who didn't get the lollipop she wanted.

"So you just--- Whoa, wait, what is Lauren _doing_?!" He had to skid to avoid hitting her. We were at the school by now and Lauren Mallory had just literally ran across the whole street to stand in front of the car. Edward had done some seriously dangerous driving avoid hitting the girl, but what annoyed me were two things. One- That she did it; she could have killed herself and hurt us. And Two- What she was wearing.

I did mention it was quite cold, right? No? Yes? Well, it is very cold, and it's misty, which adds to the danger factor, so why in the world would you wear a _mini-skirt_?

She was wearing a jeans skirt that was below the thighs. Just a little bit longer than the shorts Miley Cyrus wears. And, no, she wasn't wearing any leggings under the thing. And she was wearing a fitted jacket and freaking high heels that probably made her look taller than Jasper, and Jasper was taller than Edward, who was 6'2". So she probably looked around 6'4", and her normal height is 5'5", just one inch more than me. And her hair was dyed a weird red color with black streaks. That was just insane, but, hey, what about that girl wasn't?

Edward parked and we got out, then, before Lauren could try anything, he walked over to me and put his arm around my waist. I didn't complain; I liked how it felt to have his arm around me.

Lauren noticed and glared, but otherwise seemed not to notice I was there. "So, Eddikins, are we still on for Friday night?"

He moved his head so I could see his look of utter torture and I silently giggled, then acted outraged. Then he said: "Yeah, I guess. Later, s." She smiled and walked off quickly.

"Why'd you say 'Later, s'? What's with the 's'?" I asked as we walked to the school.

"S is short for slut. Or would you prefer b?" I chuckled. I knew what 'b' was short for.

We entered school and he walked me to me locker, kissed my cheek, then walked to his locker. I was blushing, but I opened my locker and took my coat off and got my books for English. I walked to class, and on my way saw something very interesting. Lauren was whispering to Becca Hess. They were both giggling. And they looked at me as I passed, whispering and giggling harder.

I shook my head and entered the classroom. The teacher wasn't here yet, so I started doodling absentmindedly on the back of my notebook. When the teacher finally got here, he announced: "Guys, the bell's rung! Come on, Ms. Stanely, stop texting. Thank you. Let's see, I know some of you have already finished with the presentations, and you should have already finished reading the third book on your reading list.... Don't look so shocked, Ms. Mallory, please, you should have read _The Outsiders_ by eighth grade! The test will be next Friday. And we'll have a quiz this Friday. Can anyone tell be who the author is?" I raised my had timidly. "Yes, Bella?"

"The author of _The Outsiders_ is S.E. Hinton, which is short for Susan Eloise Hinton. They used the initials because when they published the book, people didn't think a woman could write a book that good," I answered.

"That's precisely, why. Thank you, Bella. Can anyone tell me why people were shocked when the book came out?" I raised my hand. Lauren, Eric Yorkie, Mike Newton, and Kimmy Ashell did, too.

"Yes, Lauren?"

"Because, like, as Bitch, sorry, Bella, said before, people didn't think a chick could write a book. Duh," she said.

"Frankly, Ms. Mallory, that's not why. I don't appreciate you calling one of the best students here a bitch, and I really don't like that in the middle of the winter you have the nerve to wear short skirt. You have double detention for the next two weeks for bad language and a demerit for the same reason." He wrote that all down in a paper and looked at her again with a teasing smile on his face. "And that's not the right answer. Mr. Yorkie, could you please correct Ms. Mallory? This will be on the test, so pay attention."

Eric murmured something no one heard.

"Please speak up, Yorkie. I'm sure Lauren wants to hear this."

"I think people were shocked cause of how bad the rich people actually were," he said.

"Eric you disappoint me." The teacher shook his head as Lauren giggled. "Kimmy, may you tell me the answer?"

"Um, cause adults didn't know how life for teenagers was, I guess," she said.

"No. Mike, please tell me the answer."

I was getting impatient. I highly doubted he knew the real answer. "Oh, sorry, what? I was just raising my hand cause I wanna say something to Bella." I was correct. He turned to me. "Will you marry me?"

I swear, if I had any liquid in my mouth, it would've been spitted out. "Excuse me? NO!"

"Ok, then. Mr. Newton, you can join Ms. Mallory in detention this week for a comment that was out of question." He wrote the slip. "Bella?"

"People were shocked because they want to live in a peachy-clean, perfectly nice world, and the book and story were giving people who thought they lived in the perfect world a reality check. Like a wake up call. It was how real the book was that kind of shocked people who it wasn't happening to." I sighed. "What I mean is that it shocked people because they didn't live that way and they were shocked that some unlucky people did."

Mr. Mason, our English teacher who's name I always forget, clapped. "Thank you. Thank you, Bella, really. Finally. Did anyone actually read the book?" About seven people (in a twenty-seven people class) raised their hands. I mean, seriously, I read this in seventh grade.....

"Well, then I guess that out of twenty-seven people in this class, twenty will fail the quiz on Friday? Ok, well, then I'll speed up the process. Tomorrow we have the quiz. And these questions will all be on the test." The bell rung. "Dismissed." We all got up and grabbed our books and trickled out. I went to my locker to get my things and went to class, but my mind was bored with the class, so I decided to start painting a dress in my mind. By lunch time I had a whole Prom dress line.

I walked to lunch and sat at my usual table alone. Angela arrived three minutes later, but I knew no one else would be sitting with us. Edward would probably sit with Lauren, as Alice, and Jasper, Emmett and Rosalie had no reason to sit with me. Or so I thought.

Rosalie, Emmett, and Jasper walked over here instead of to their usual table. Rosalie asked: "Can we sit here with you, Bella?" I nodded.

"Why?" I asked.

"Because Alice has those idiots sitting at our table and I really don't need to hear them talking about how hot Edward is." She chuckled. "Edward's sitting here, though. Alice wants to see Lauren's reaction."

I nodded. About three minutes later, Edward appeared and sat next to me. He kissed my cheek and I blushed. Then we continued eating our packed lunches in silence. School food was gross. About ten minutes later I heard a screech coming from what used to be the Cullen table. And then Lauren, in her mini that was showing her butt, was in front of me. She yelled: "You little whore! How dare you sit with my beau?!" Then she slapped me. Across the cheek.

I jumped up.

"Who are _you_ to slap _me_? Are you President Obama? Are you God? I didn't think so! Go the hell away! And leave me alone!" I yelled.

She slapped me again and Edward stood up. I turned to him. My cheek stung and I knew it was red and everybody in the cafeteria, (including lunch ladies), were watching. "Edward Cullen, don't you dare defend me. I can do that by myself, thank you very much." And he sat back down.

And Lauren pushed me hard and I fell on my butt on the floor. She laughed. "Oh, now it's on!" Some random kid yelled.

I got up and glared at her. Daring her to make another move. She laughed. "Oh, poor little Bella's afraid of a fight! Afraid Edward doesn't like her! Afraid I'll crush her social status by taking away the one thing that actually likes her! She's afraid of everything!"

She laughed again and my blood boiled. "That's it!" I yelled. "Stop it! Stop it!" I ran at her. She tried to run away, but her heels were too high and she sprained her ankle and tripped and started crying. She pulled herself out of the room, still crying.

And people started clapping. And whopping. And whistling. Why in the world? Why are people cheering?

"Dude," I said as I sat down, "why is everyone cheering?" Edward looked at me and said: "Because, you're the first person to ever stand up to Lauren. Ever. And you just did that."

I was shocked. I couldn't move. I couldn't even see my plate. I mean, if I tried I could probably move, but I didn't, and I could see my plate, but I didn't see it. Like, really see it. You know, when you look at something but you don't really see it because your mind's like a billion miles away? Yeah, that was how I felt. At least until I heard Alice's fingers snap in front of my face. I startled.

"Whoa, Alice! Stop that!" I said. She stopped and smiled kindly.

"Bellyboo, what do you think I should do now?" She asked.

"Bout wha?" I asked through a mouthful of the sandwich I was eating for lunch.

"Lauren and all the other popular puppies! What do I do?" She said.

I swallowed before answering. "I don't know." The bell rung. "But I am off to class." I stood up and Edward and Angela followed suit. We walked to Biology and sat in our seats, and then Edward began playing with a strand of my hair. It was cute, watching him make the little curl bounce, then smoothing it out, then making it bounce again. Real cute. And then the TV set rolled into the room.

Mr. Banner turned it on and the random movie we were watching continued. I was not even watching. And if you're wondering about Edella Gabby, Alice is in a morning class and she wanted to take care of her. So she did. My baby was safe somewhere. That sounds weird coming from a seventeen-year-old, doesn't it?

I feel stupid, telling you my every thought and everything that happens during the day, so I'm going to stop here. Later.

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**What did you think? Review! Bye!**


	15. Chapter 15

**You people just really either don't want me to post, you want to make me very miserable, or your school teachers abuse you. I'm almost done with Catch Me, and Bottom Of The Ocean still has a way to go. And I asked for some reviews so I know what you guys think of the newest chapter. I'm already kind of miserable with my friends because it was one of my best friend's birthday sleep-over party thing, and we were playing 'Never Have I Ever', which is a game where you say that phrase and then something, and you have all your fingers up, and every time someone says something that you've done, you have to put down one finger. We were seven girls. They were saying things like, "Have you ever kissed a boy?" They all lowered a finger but me. "Have you ever had s-e-x?" Two were going to, but it wasn't actual ---, so they didn't. Then one said, "Have you ever sucked it?" Two lowered fingers, the same ones with ---. One at school with a guy she didn't even like. I felt like a total loser. The only time I put a finger down was when a girl said, "Have you ever been in love?" and I'm pretty sure it was puppy love. I never even told the guy. I'm not perverted in any freaking way. We were all sitting on a matress on the floor, and I stood up and sat on the far corner and they started sort of yelling at me that I shouldn't be ashamed and that I should be laughing at _them_, not the other way around. I started crying. I haven't even had a boyfriend, and yet here I am, writing in first person as if I was actually feeling these feelings that I want to write. I'm so pathetic. I'm giving up. I don't want reviews saying: "Oh, don't give up now! I'm dying to know what happens!" Well, if you want to know what happens and I effing tell you, why don't youi at least send a freaking "Thanks"? I don't _have_ to post my stories, and it's actually bad for me, because if I want to publish them, then I can't because some people have already read them! **

**I asked for a self-esteem boost, you told me I'd get one, and then I gave you what you wanted and my self-esteem is lower than before because of that sleep-over! And anyone who thinks I'm doing this to get pity or for show or because I'm a bitchy hypocrite, this is actually how I feel! Thanks for reading. I'll give you until Valentine's day. If I feel that you guys actually like the story, then I'll continue posting. If not, then it will be saved on the laptop from which I am writing now, and it'll be kept there until I can do something with it. **

** --Adriana (Gabreilla) **

**P.S. I only put my real name when I'm either really sad or really disappointed.**


	16. Chapter 16

**I'm writing on Valentine's Day, but I'm not going to post so soon. I'll be posting at the end of the chapter a list of the people who reviewed. Remember, this is the second chapter of the trial; you still have this and one more chapter to review and make me have inspiration again. And this is totally off-topic, but did you guys see StarStruck? I watched it and I loooooved it. And I sort of fell in love with Sterling Knight's voice. He'd give Nick Jonas a run for his money (in my opinion).**

**I also wanted to clear this up, mostly because I think it wasn't clear. Bella got to Forks a little after her birthday, so around September 20th or so. Her depression lasted for like two months, I think, so she was depressed right through Thanksgiving, but it's going to be Christmas now, and right now it'll be Christmas break. I'm going to write a little about what happened before the break, then what happened at Christmas, and skip all the way to Valentine's Day, and then a bit of later. I think I'll be finishing this story in two or three chapters. And, sorry for all the Lauren haters, (myself included), but I decided to cancel Alice trying to be popular and everything. You'll see why soon.**

**

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BPOV:**

It was one week until Christmas break. Everything had changed. I remember quite clearly the day that had marked the end of Lauren. Literally. The next day, she dropped out of school. She was going to some school in Texas, I think, so it was clear that I would probably never see her again.

Alice dropped her 'wanting to be popular' act as soon as Lauren crawled out of the cafeteria that day. Edward was real glad that he wouldn't have to take her out, ever. And I could see why. If the girl wore the slutty outfit she did just to get an answer for whether he would or would not take her out, I shuddered to imagine what she'd wear to the date. Probably a swimsuit, or just underwear. Maybe something with a plunging neckline and nothing under it. Gross. Why am I even thinking of this?

And speaking of Edward..... Well, I had been a little while ago. Anyway, apparently, people thought I was his girlfriend-- not that either one of us minded. After our baby project, we'd kind of been inseparable. He'd walk me to class, he'd drive me to school and back, he gave me a few gifts. He knew how I hate attention, so one day, he waited after school by my locker, and when I walked to it, he gave me a small, blue velvet box. I was sort of afraid to open it, but I did. It was a silver necklace, and it had one very small circle pendant. On the front, it had carved in very carefully three stars; one little, the second slightly larger, the third one bigger than all of them and with lines around it, suggesting it shined brightest. He put it around my neck and flipped the pendant around and read the back: "_You are my shining star_".

I didn't take it off. Ever. Not even to shower. Too much information, right? But it was special to me. I wasn't sure if it was real silver, and Edward wouldn't tell me, but it was so sweet of him. And incredibly gentlemanly to put it around my neck, fasten it, and then kiss my cheek and hug me from behind, wrapping his arms around my torso. Such a sweet boy. I doubted you could find boys like that these days.

And things were fine with Rosalie. She was being nice, though not like Alice. Alice was full on BFFFLmode, whatever that meant. I had her explain it once, it was Best Female Friends For Life. She said she had a feeling we'd be friends forever, so I kept my mouth shut at the silly title. Emmett and Jasper were just two jokesters. Emmett was really funny and just like a big teddy bear once you got over how intimidating he looked. And he loved to play pranks on people, and he thought it was hilarious every time I tripped, stumbled, and/or fell. Jasper was slightly more serious. He was really interested in the Civil War, because he said his great great great great great great great great great grandfather had lived during it, and he'd left a notebookabout everything that happened, because he was in the war, and he argued very heatedly withour History teacher because apparently, the book had some facts wrong. But he liked to prank everyone, yet he didn't think my poor balance was something to laugh at.

I was currently doing my last homework assignment for the day. Edward was on the floor next to me, with his Spanish book open in front of him. He was supposed to be reading a short story and get a lesson out of it. I was finishing some Trig problems. We were laying on the floor in my room, my ankles in the air, shoes off. Once we were done, we were going to go out for hot chocolate. It was finally cold enough to see snow. I wore boots to school now, and last week was the first time I'd ever seen snow. It was so pretty.

You'd think I'd hate snow, but my first reaction was making a mush ball and throwing it at Edward, which turned into a snowball fight with his whole family, Angela, Charlie, and another kid that lived on my street. He was around ten, but he was so funny.

..........

The last school week went by fast, but that was probably because the last three days of school were snow days. Edward came over and drank hot chocolate made by yours truly and then we'd watch a movie or just be with each other.

And I know I tell you this all the time, but I _have not given up my promises_. We kissed, hung out, went on the occasional date, but we never actually did more than that. I loved him, but I was way too insecure to say it, and I didn't know if he loved me.

Tomorrow was Christmas Eve, and Charlie and I were invited to spend it at the Cullen house. He and Carlisle had gotten along so well that it wasn't Edward who invited me, it was Carlislewho invited Charlie. I was going to wear a dress Alice picked out, but the shoes were my pick. They were flats, same color as the dress, but they were simple, cute, and completely comfortable. And I got a cute little clutch that went withit. The dress was a silver color, with spaghetti straps, and it was about an inch above my knees. It was really nice.

..........

Christmas Eve was amazing with the Cullen family. They'd decorated the entire house beautifully. There was mistletoe on almost every door, and I knew Alice had just put those there as an excuse to have Edward and me kiss. We kissed twice. Once when I got through the door and Charlie went to the kitchen to help Carlisleand Esme, and the second time before we left. We had a great time, and I was embarrassed by bothEmmett's sick and stupid jokes and Charlie's tales of how I was when I was a little over two years old. Apparently, I didn't like mindless TV shows like Barney or any of the ones normal kids used to watch, apparently, I grabbed a picture book and looked at the pictures. And I stopped using my diaper when I was only two and three months old. And I'd screamed when Charlie said he was gonna go fishing, because I thought there were sharks in the river. That was about the time I shut him up.

"Well, thanks for inviting us over! Merry Christmas! You're coming to my house tomorrow, right?" Then we left.

And the next morning, they did stop by our house, with presents. I'd gotten Alice and Rosalie these super-cute shirts and we got Esme and Carlisle a vase, Emmett and Jasper a video game they'd been obsessing over, and I'd told Charlie to let me handle Edward's gift. I wouldn't get him jewelery or clothes, because he wasn't that type of guy. He liked music, and I knew what CD to get him, but it seemed lame. So I decided on play him the song I wrote. I even took him to my room, but as I was getting my laptop, I chickened out and straightened up, put my arms around his neck and gave him a special kiss.

And I haven't played him the song. And I wrote it a really long time ago. Like, when I first met him.

..........

School was back and everything was the same. It was boring. The only upside to the monotony was that Edward was there.

..........

Valentine's day would be approaching, and I knew Edward was planning something big. Alice told me he asked her and Rosalie what they thought I'd like. Rose kept saying I just wanted a simple dinner, or even just staying at home and watching Romeo and Juliet or the _Tilight_ movie. But Alice wanted something else. And she wasn't telling.

I knew Emmett and Rosalie were going to a couples' dance club, and they could get in since they were both eighteen. Jasper and Alice were going to watch _Valentine's Day_and then go to dinner. Charlie was going down to spend it watching some game with another single man, Billy. Esme and Carlisle were going to have dinner together. All I really wanted to do was watch the Disney movie _StarStruck_. I'd seen the trailer and I really wanted to watch it.

Edward, however, for some reason didn't want to tell me what we were doing. It was Friday February 12th today. And I was going to call Edward. I fished my phone out of my bag. It was after school, but today the boys had gone somewhere, and Alice and Rosalie were shopping, so I went home alone. I hit Edward's speed dial and he picked up halfway through the second ring.

"Hey, Bells," I heard Edward's voice said. I heard Emmett's booming snicker in my ear.

"Hey, where are you?" I asked.

"Oh, just getting some things." I sighed. "What do you think about watching_ Valentine's Day_ today?"

"Um, actually, I wanted to stay home today," I said sincerily. "How about we just hang out tonight? Or I make dinner?"

"Yeah, ok, sounds great," he said. "Wait--." I heard some ruffling of a paper bag and what sounded like a woman yelling some unprintable words, and Jasper yelling back, then Edward yelling, crashing, and the line went dead. What in the world? I decided to call Emmett, just to make sure they were ok.

I dialed and waited. He picked up around the fourth ring.

"Hey Emmett, are you guys ok?" I heard him groan.

"Depends on your definition of 'ok', Bella," he said in a strained voice.

"Where are you?" I asked urgently, already grabbing my keys and some shoes.

"Don't come. We're in Port Angeles," he said.

"I'm coming. Where are you?" I said in a hard voice. He gave in and told me they were in some clothes shop. They were looking for presents for Alice, Rose and me. I got in my truck and drove with Emmett still on the phone. "So what happened? Edward was talking to me and then he stopped and--."

"I'll tell you if you don't freak out. Ok, we were in line to pay when this lady started yelling at Jasper that Southern people couldn't shop in the store. Jasper got really mad, but he didn't say anything. Then Jasper started talking to me, and you know how his voice sounds normal? Well, he and Rose are from the South, and they have accents, but they grew out of that, but Jazz started talking like that to me. The lady called him a whole lot of names, and Jazz yelled back. Then Ed gave me the phone, and started yelling at the woman to stop, and she pushed him into a glass table. She ran out of the place. Edward had broken the glass table. He's fine, don't worry. But he's got cuts on his back where the glass cut in.

"Bella, where are you?"

"I just passed the 'Welcome to Forks' sign. And no, Emm, I can't hurry up in a car straight from the fifties." I hung up and drove as fast as I could. I got there in record time. And there was a cop grabbing a wild-looking woman withred hair by the arms into a car. She was wearing jeans and a button-down shirt, but her hair was all over the place, and it was curly red. Wild red. I parked the truck and walked inside. Edward was sitting in a painful-looking position with Emmett and Jasper next to him. I ran to them.

"Edward! Edward, are you ok?" I yelled as I reached them. They looked up. Jasper and Emmett's face were full of concern. Edward's was full of pain, and he tried to smile at me, but it came out as a grimace.

"I'm fine. Just my back. Stupid lady. What did I do to her?" he muttered.

"Are you in pain?" I asked.

Emmett shot me a 'Well-No-Duh!' face, but Edward merely nodded and said: "Just a little. Carlisle should be arriving soon."

I nodded and sat next to him and waited. Carlisle came and fixed Edward up. They got in an ambulance and drove to the Forks, with me and Emmett following in my truck and Jasper in the Volvo. After two hours in the hospital, Edward was all bandaged up and good to go, but he had to take some pills to take the pain away. He could walk and sit normally now, though, so at least he wasn't hurting so much.

We went to my house and I made some dinner, which we ate while watching some Disney movie. I wasn't paying attention. Then a trailer for StarStruck came on. It was premiering on Sunday, Valentine's Day.

"Hey, I've been wanting to watch that movie! Why don't we do _that_ on Sunday?" I piped up. Silence met my proposition. "What?"

"I wanted to do something special for Sunday, Bella, and watching a random movie played on Disney is most definitively _not_ special," he said.

"But it's special because you'll be with me. And you just got your back pelted with glass thanks to some psycho woman who hates Jasper because of where he was born. You're in no shape to do anything else, Edward. Plus I really, really want to watch this movie, and it sounds so sweet," I said.

"Can't we go somewhere for lunch and then come see the movie, Bella?" he pleaded.

"Fine," I huffed. I knew he'd go over-the-top with this lunch, but at least since it was daytime I wouldn't have to wear a dress. "So what would we be doing?"

"Lunch at my house. It'll be sunny, so it will take place in our garden. I will say no more. Except that I've been watching the Food Channel," he amended. I giggled.

We continued to watch the movie in silence, I think it was the Wizards of Waverly Place movie, until Charlie came home and smelled my pasta. He asked me for a plate and sat on the armchair to watch the movie. I gave him a plate and sat carefully on the couch next to Edward.

"So, uh, Edward, I heard you were hurt pretty badly," Charlie started. Edward nodded. "Well, I just wanted to say I'm sorry, and that if you want to press any charges, the woman lives in the Seattle area." Silence met his statement, so he tried another method. "So, uh, what are we, uh, what are we watching?"

"It's that Wizards of Waverly Place movie. You know, the one they filmed in Puerto Rico? The tropical island I've always wanted to go to?" I said. "They don't actually _say_ it's Puerto Rico in the film, but I know it is. The sights are the same and I know the beaches, because they're so beautiful. Anyway, the movie's almost done, Dad, we'll go soon. I know there's a game on later," I said.

The movie finished and Edward said he should go home. I walked him out to the car and offered to drive him, but he said it was fine. I hoped it was. I told him to call me when he got home just in case. And after half an hour he did. I went to sleep, slightly worried about what would happen tomorrow.

..........

Saturday passed by in a rush. I was excited because StarStruck was premiering tomorrow, and because of Edward's special lunch tomorrow. I was jumpy the whole day while finishing some undone homework. The day was calm, I just wasn't. Even when Alice arrived to plan my outfit for tomorrow. She said Edward was having this little table set up on their garden, and it was going to be under the sunlight. So she said cute, light colors would be chosen from my wardrobe for my date. She said light colors and cute, feminine touches would be perfect. I sighed, but at least she wasn't making me wear a sparkly LBD (Little Black Dress).

She picked a light pink floral print blouse I hardly ever wore, and underneath a sky blue cami. Actually, I shouldn't say 'sky blue', because here that would be gray, but Hawaii 'sky blue' is fine. She picked out that, plus some normal-colored skinny jeans, and my sweet and cute black flats that went with everything. I was concerned that it would be cold, but Alice Almighty said it would be in the high seventies tomorrow. And that my silver things, like my necklace, ring and bracelets would make edgy yet cute touches.

Then she left.

Thank the Lord.

..........

I was woken up by the sound of my stupid phone getting a text. God, why is someone texting me at eight twenty-three in the morning? I sat up groggily and grabbed the phone. Then I felt my face light up as I read who the text was _from_. Edward. I opened it and read it, suddenly anxious and nervous and completely wide awake.

_"Hey, bella, happy valentine's day. can i come pik u up 11? --Edward"_

I sighed. I could get ready in that time _and_ read a few chapters of the online story I was reading. It was quite cute, and I wanted Samantha and Alex together already.

I went downstairs and ate my cereal, then looked out the window. Charlie was gone, of course. Already at La Push with Billy. I went upstairs and texted Edward. It read: _"Happy v-day, 2, eddie! sure u can pick me up at 11. bye. c u l8r."_ When I was done with that, I got the clothes and the blowdrier out and grabbed a towel and my bag of toiletries a hand crossed to the bathroom. I turned the hot water on and let it pelt my skin until I was wet enough. It felt good. I grabbed my strawberry shampoo and rubbed it on my hair. What no one knows (or should know) is that I like to wash my body with the shampoo. It leaves your body softer and it smells better than most body washes. You should try it some time. I told the author to; now she has very soft skin.

Then I rinsed off and put the conditioner on and rubbed it on my scalp. I was done sooner than I would have liked to be, but I wrapped myself in a towel regardless. I brushed my teeth harder than really necessary, but I'm Bella, so I worry about everything, even having traces of Honey Bunches of Oats stuck in my teeth. Then I dried myself and put on the clothes. My hair was damp, so I brushed it out and dried it to perfection. Then I put on a little flower pin in my hair, and took my dark blue hoodie and my bag, and put on my flats. I got my laptop and walked down to the couch.

I had a Wi-Fi network installed in the house when I realized that I was unconnected unless I was using the slowest computer ever. So I could go read the online story sitting on the couch. I actually read like five chapters of Muted by the time Edward called. He was almost here. And he wished me a happy Valentine's Day. It was eleven, so I guess I lost track of time. I heard the doorbell ring. I closed my laptop and grabbed my bag and walked to the door, then opened it.

"Hey," I said. I got on my tiptoes and kissed his cheek.

"Hey, Bella," he said in his velvet voice. He hugged me and walked me to his car. He opened my door, where a single red rose sat. I turned to him.

"For me?" He nodded. "Thank you so much!" I hugged him again. I grabbed the rose and sat slowly. He got in the car and drove off. As we turned off my street, he turned on some music. I recognized the song-- it was one of my favorites-- _The Only Exception_ by Paramore. I loved it. And after it, _Jump Then Fall_ by Taylor Swift-- another of my favorites-- played. About three songs later he was parking in his home garage. He opened the door for me and held my hand and lead me out. He lead me out the door of the garage and through the stone steps I'd seen the time I came here for the sleepover. The steps lead to the door for the kitchen, but they had another path that turned right. Edward put his hands over my eyes and lead me to another door. I walked slowly, blindly, until I stumbled. He caught me and I peeked. I was walking to a little tent. I was almost there. Edward put his hands on eyes again.

We walked a little more and he moved one hand and we walked like an inch, then he removed his hand and whispered: "Open your eyes." I opened them and gasped.

It was amazing.

Beautiful.

!!!

I couldn't form coherent thoughts about how amazing it was.

'It' was actually the inside of the tent. There was a small, circular table with a white tablecloth over it, and it wasn't candlelit, but on the tent, the part that was directly over the table, was clear plastic, so the sunlight illuminated the space. Around the table, across from each other, were two chairs. And on the one with it's back to the entrance there was a HUGE teddy bear. I looked at Edward. "Is that where I sit?" I asked. He nodded. I walked forward and took the teddy bear in my arms, then sat on the chair. He sat opposite me and played with my fingers as I gazed around the inside of the tent.

It was very beautiful. We were on a little meadow, or maybe Esme's garden. There were flowers everywhere, all different colors, and the grass was quite green, and there was a little swing just a few feet from where we were. I was sitting absentminded when Edward poked my arm and I looked up. I almost choked to death-- of laughter-- when I saw Emmett in a tight waiter's uniform. The shirt was really tight, and he was completely busting out of it, the pants looked ridiculous on the guy who always wore sweats or jeans, and he'd slicked back his hair, the vest was spread too tightly around his torso, and watching him hold a tray, a towel and a little notebook. Completely hysterical. I tried not to laugh, but a little giggle escaped. He glared at me.

"Hello, Bella, Edward. Today, I was obligated into being your waiter." Edward nudged him hard in the ribs. "I mean, I volunteered to being your waiter. Anyway, what would you like to drink, madam? A hint, we have water, coke, water, lemonade, water, apple juice, water, vodka, but that's for throwing out, water.... Please make a choice."

"Uhh, I think I'll have the..... uh..... I guess the water," I said. He wrote it down and turned to Edward.

"And you?"

"Water, too," he said. Emmett walked off muttering what must have been insults under his breath. I laughed.

"Is he always like that?" Edward nodded, but he added: "But usually he curses more, just not when Rose or Esme are around." We just laughed a little more until I got my breath back and asked a question.

"Who forced him to be our waiter, huh?" I asked.

"Um, I'd like to say Alice, but actually, it was Rosalie. She wanted to make this special, and she said it wouldn't be if I was getting our food and stuff. Plus, she said she wouldn't do anything he wanted if he didn't do me this one favor, which he resented," Edward said sheepishly. "It was not my idea."

I nodded and continued my uncontrollable giggling. A few minutes later Emmett came back with our water, and he asked what we'd like to eat. "We have chicken tenders, pizza, pasta, pizza, sandwiches, pizza..." I laughed.

"Pizza, I guess, but only as long as it's pepperoni," I said.

"Uh, well, that's perfect, then, Miss, because that's what we got," Emmett said. "And you, sir? What would you like?"

"Pizza for me, too, please," Edward said, all the while trying not to laugh.

Emmett left, walking stiffly. I shouldn't have to say that he hated playing waiter for his younger brother.

The date was undeniably amazing, and around one thirty we were done, so we came back inside. We walked along the living room until we reached an ivory piano. It was very elegant, and I'd seen it before. I never asked about it, though, because I was always so intimidated by something so beautiful. Edward, however, sat down fearlessly, as if he owned it. Which he probably did. He pulled me down with him and started playing. He played a beautiful song. Amazing. I loved it. It was sweet when it started, yet it had a sad and note in each sweet one. By the end, it was very sad and it sounded so painful. I was crying. I had tears running down my cheeks. I hadn't even noticed it until Edward took a finger and wiped my tears away gently.

"That was amazing, Edward," I said. "Why'd you never tell me you played?"

"You never asked," he said. I grinned.

"It's almost two. Why don't we go for ice cream? It's sunny today," I said after a little while of just sitting in silence.

He wordlessly got up and took my hand, and gently pulled me up with him. He lead me by the hand through the house to the garage, where he pressed me gently against the door and leaned down. He kissed me sweetly, just how I liked to be kissed. I didn't like the burning passion that supposedly has to be there so the kiss is real. He didn't grab my ass or shove his tongue down my throat. His lips just simply moved in sync with mine. And, yeah, for any of you detail-craving bimbos, I _did_ feel the fireworks. I leaned back slightly to break the kiss and he smiled and leaned in to kiss my cheek. Then he gently (yes, he is always gentle with me) pushed me to the side so he could open the car door. I got in and we sped off to the Baskin Robins nearby.

We arrived and ordered our ice cream. I got a medium cup of Mint Chocolate Chip and Edward got a medium cup of French Vanilla. I called him lame and he proceeded to take one of the sampling spoons and shoving half the ice cream into my mouth. I tried swallowing like thirty times until I gave up and spit it in a cup. Then he bought me a new one. I giggled and shoveled his ice cream into his mouth. But he actually swallowed it. Then we walked around a park and he pushed me on the swings like we were six years old. Then it was around five. We went to my place and ordered pizza.

When it finally got here, (like two hours later), the guy said it was free since he'd gotten lost, our pizza was cold and it had taken one hour and thirty minutes over the time they'd told us it would take. When Edward put his arm around my waist the dude said: "Happy Valentine's Day," and walked off to his car. I closed the door, heated the pizza in the microwave and turned on the TV. I know it's totally childish to watch Disney Channel when you're going to be eighteen soon, but I only watch like a few shows. And I think Sonny With A Chance was playing. One of the new ones. So we watched until StarStruck started. I squealed, cried, and said I wanted shades like those. Yes, I cried over a DCOM. You're probably wondering what the hell is wrong with me, but one second Christopher tells her she's amazing and the next she's just an ordinary girl?! And then he says: "The paparazzi will ruin everything." Jessica Olson is crying and she says: "They don't have to. You already did."

All in all, I totally loved it. I bought the soundtrack. _What You Mean To Me_, the song he sings to her at the dance, has been on repeat as backround music while Edward and I talked. Then I realized something. It's Valentine's Day, and I know I love him. I know he likes me enough. I haven't showed him the song yet. Why not?

"Um, Edward, would you mind coming up with me?" I asked timidly. He looked at me and shock covered his features. "Oh, gross, no! Nothing like that, Ed. I just wanted to show you something!" He smiled apologetically and followed me to my room. I got the guitar and my laptop and sat cross-legged on the floor. He sat across from me and watched with a curious expression as I logged on the computer and looked for the program. I found the file and clicked it, then let mouse settle right next to the play button. I looked at him.

"Edward, this is something I wrote a little while ago. I hope you like it." I pressed the button and sang.

_Before I fall too fast  
Kiss me quick but make it last  
So I can see how badly this will hurt me  
When you say goodbye_

_Keep it sweet, keep it slow  
Let the future pass, and don't let go  
But tonight I could fall too soon  
Under this beautiful moonlight_

_But you're so hypnotizing  
You've got me laughing while I sing  
You've got me smiling in my sleep  
And I can see this unraveling  
Your love is where I'm falling  
But please don't catch me_

_See this heart won't settle down  
Like a child running scared from a clown  
I'm terrified of what you do  
My stomach screams just when I look at you_

_Run far away so I can breathe  
Even though you're far from suffocating me  
I can't set my hopes too high  
Cause every 'Hello' ends with a 'Goodbye'_

_But you're so hypnotizing  
You've got me laughing while I sing  
You've got me smiling in my sleep  
And I can see this unraveling  
Your love is where I'm falling  
But please don't catch me_

_So now you see  
While I'm scared  
I can open up my heart without a care  
But here I go  
It's what I feel  
And for the first time in my life I know it's real_

_But you're so hypnotizing  
You've got me laughing while I sing  
You've got me smiling in my sleep  
And I can see this unraveling  
Your love is where I'm falling  
So please don't catch me_

_If this is love please don't break me  
I'm giving up so just catch me_

His smile was dazzling. His eyes were smoldering. His .... His...... Oh, God, he was Edward, he was him. It wasn't just any boy!

I waited for his reaction.

He leaned forward and hugged me tightly. And I'd never felt more loved.

..........

It's March now. Things are the same. Edward and I are still dating, and I'm sure some of you there are going: "No, duh, Bella! You two belong together, like Taylor Swift and her four Grammys!" We haven't said that we love each other yet, and frankly, I'm holding back because if I say it, it will completely terminate my promise. I'd adjusted it so I could be with him, but this would be different. It'd be like forgetting the promise completely, and no matter how much I bent it, it wasn't broken. Not yet. Because I knew that sooner or later we'd say it. It was how he was. Old fashioned.

I was doing great in school, at home, and I was making happier music that I'd rather not put here. And Lauren wasn't there, and because she was Head Bitch, all the following bitches just glared and threw snide comments that I promptly ignored.

Yet I had this feeling that something was coming. Like the calm before a storm. I sensed something bad coming. I don't know how, or why, or even where or when, but I had a feeling something was coming.

* * *

**What do you think? Too much fluff? Please review. And as sad as it is for me to say (or type) this, I think this story will end in about two or three chapters. For some reason, since like chapter 4 or something, I knew this story would be around 17 chapters long. I love you guys, the people that read this. Thank you so much to this one person, Blue Eyed Hawk, or a name along those lines, for those very nice words. I didn't respond to any of the reviews, and I'm for once leaving an Author's Note in this story, because I want people to see the real world. Just like what S. E. Hinton wanted to do with _The Outsiders_. She wanted to make REALISTIC TEEN FICTION. And that's a peek at what's really going through my friend's brains. And the girl's birthday was 14. I'm 13. Please review. Bye.**


	17. Chapter 17 Last Chapter

**BPOV:**

_It's March now. Things are the same. Edward and I are still dating, and I'm sure some of you there are going: "No, duh, Bella! You two belong together, like Taylor Swift and her four Grammys!" We haven't said that we love each other yet, and frankly, I'm holding back because if I say it, it will completely terminate my promise. I'd adjusted it so I could be with him, but this would be different. It'd be like forgetting the promise completely, and no matter how much I bent it, it wasn't broken. Not yet. Because I knew that sooner or later we'd say it. It was how he was. Old fashioned._

_I was doing great in school, at home, and I was making happier music that I'd rather not put here. And Lauren wasn't there, and because she was Head Bitch, all the following bitches just glared and threw snide comments that I promptly ignored._

_Yet I had this feeling that something was coming. Like the calm before a storm. I sensed something bad coming. I don't know how, or why, or even where or when, but I had a feeling something was coming._

I know I'm being paranoid. It sounds that way in my head. I'm sure it sounds paranoid here, too. I don't know. You tell me.

But I felt that way. And it freaked me out. And by what the author told me, it freaked a certain Isabel Carson out, too. And I didn't want to freak anyone else out, so I didn't tell anyone. Not even Alice, or Edward. Partly because Alice would either tell me I was being paranoid and not to worry (and I'm Bella; how could I _not_?), or she'd tell me that I should worry. And if I told Edward, it would worry him for two things: 1) What would happen, and 2) My sanity.

So I kept it to myself, for two weeks. Until one day, when Edward was supposed to be at my house studying for a Midterm, Alice called.

Let me back up a little and tell you what's been going on.

I was studying for a huge Biology test we were going to have on Tuesday, and Edward promised he'd help me study, since I hardly understood. Why are we doing the periodic table in Biology? Isn't that Physics? I mean, I'm not the teacher, but I feel pretty lost. Anyway, Edward said he had to go get something from Port Angeles first, but he'd be at my place around two. I started freaking out when it was two thirty. He was never late. And if he was, he would call.

I was a nervous wreck. I just felt like something was going to happen today. Something bad. And I couldn't help but be anxious.

For an hour, I sat next to my phone nervously, waiting for it to ring.

Why isn't it ringing? If Edward lost his phone, Alice would know, and she'd get him a new one, or call me and tell me, or both. If he got caught up in something, he'd call and tell me. If he was hurt-- God, that idea hurt so much!-- then he'd make someone call.

Why…is…the…phone…not…ringing…?

I jumped as Alice's ring-- _Something About The Sunshine_-- played. I picked it up and flipped it open before Anna Margaret could sing "There's something".

"B-Bella?" Alice sobbing voice alarmed me more, if that was even possible.

"Alice! Alice! Calm down," I said quickly. "What is it?"

"Oh, it's--it's Edward!" she sobbed. "He g-got hit! C-car ac-ccident!"

"Alice, where are you?!" I yelled.

"Road! Where he-- where he is!" I grabbed a coat and my keys and ran out the door.

"Alice, I'm in the car now! Tell me where to go!" She tried to control her breathing, (and crying), and told me she was seven miles forward on the highway from Port Angeles. I followed directions at the speed limit this old thing could go and got there in around twenty minutes-- and gasped at the scene before me.

Edward's precious Volvo, crashed. Even if Edward spent a year working on it, it would _never_ be the same. The whole front was scratched with blue paint, the headlights broken, the windows cracked. The car was a mess. Another car, a blue one, had suffered minor damage, compared to what the Volvo had endured. Only it's passenger door, and the whole right side were damaged, just slightly crashed and scratched with silver paint. There were four police cruisers parked along the side, and an ambulance. I parked my truck, put on the coat and got out.

Immediately Alice ran up and hugged me. She threw her skinny arms around my neck, tears still running freely. I hugged her back, but as I looked over her shoulder, (which incidentally is not hard), and recognized one of the police cruisers.

"Alice," I whispered in her ear, "what's my dad doing here? What happened?"

She drew back and drew in a quivering breath. "Edward was coming back from Port Angeles, driving like he always does, and some guy just randomly decided to switch to the right side of the road, and he crashed into-- into Edward!" She broke down again. I hugged her gently, tears of my own spilling down.

"How bad it he, if the guy hit the driver's side?" I asked.

"Four broken ribs, a broken leg, and cuts all over his forehead, Bells," my father's voice said. turned, still clutching Alice to me. "Bella, where are your shoes? Have you not noticed it's raining? There are puddles all over the place!" I ignored him.

"Dad, why are you here?" I asked.

"I have to ask the man what happened," he said simply. His voice, however, revealed more rage than anything I'd ever heard him say. "Ah, and there he is." Dad walked toward a guy leaning against a police cruiser. The guy had nerve.

He looked in his early twenties. He was dressed in jeans, biker boots, and a leather jacket. His hair was blond, and held back in a ponytail. He was quite average-looking, but he had the kind of air of someone who thought they were the sexiest person in the world. It made me sick.

Alice and I followed Charlie to the guy, locked in each other's embrace.

"So, sir, I'm Charlie Swan, Chief of Police, that's my daughter, Bella, and her friend and the sister of the boy you nearly killed, Alice. What's your name?" Dad asked in his authority voice.

"James' the name, Hunter's the game," the guy slurred. Dad sniffed. He frowned and wrote furiously in his pad.

"So, ah, what exactly were you doing?"

"On my way to Seattle," the dude said.

"Why?" Anger and impatience radiated off Charlie like waves. I'd never seen him like this.

"This chick keeps following me around, so I stole her car keys and GPS after a good time last night and took off. I was gonna drive to Seattle, then fly to Atlanta, then to Germany, where she'd never find me," the guy said.

"And were you drunk, when you took off?"

"No, siree. I just drank a couple o' beers in the car. Maybe a dozen, maybe a little less, maybe more. All I know is I got no money to go to jail. All I want is beer and a hot girl. Maybe the tall, dark haired one right there will do," the guy said.

I blushed while Charlie furiously said: "That's my DAUGHTER!!!!"

The guy looked unabashed.

Charlie tried to calm down, but he was not happy. Every time there was a car accident in Forks, usually it was because of either the pounding rain that didn't let you see or the puddles that made the roads unsafe. Driving drunk, with a stolen car and GPS in the middle of the day was a new one.

"And how did you crash?"

The guy shifted his weight from foot to foot, then answered. "I was heading to Port Angeles to get some clothes and stuff, ang I think I was going the wrong way. The GPS told me to bear right, so I kind of just directed my car right and crashed into a car. Don't worry, though, I'm not hurt."

"But the other driver is, badly. Even if his family doesn't press charges, you're going to jail for a while for driving drunk, and you're getting a fine for stealing, and also, because your GPS told you to bear right. Don't you know you have to look before you change lanes?!" Dad's voice was thick with anger and irritation.

"Naw, I never got my liscense," the guy said.

"Another reason to get arrested," Dad muttered. He wrote it all down and escorted the man--James Hunter-- to the other police cruiser. Then he came to me and said: "Bella, Edward's still in the ambulance. You can go visit him. Aren't you cold, though?"

I _was_ cold, but I wasn't going to tell him that. Seeing Edward was much more important. So I shook my head, exited Alice's embrace and walked toward the ambulance, avoiding the puddles.

There was a guy standing near the entrance of the ambulance, staring off into space, so I cleared my throat and he looked up. He must have seen the longing, the need, the desperation in my eyes, because he opened the doors and let me in without a word. I walked inside.

Ah. Instant warmth. Nice. Or, at least it was until I saw Edward.

His forehead was bloody, and on his left pants' leg, there was a lump that shouldn't be there. I sucked in a quick breath, but he heard me. He looked up and smiled, or rather tried to, but it came out as a grimace. He was hurting-- that much was obvious. And his pain was my pain. But he patted the space next to him on the bed and I sat on it.

"The guy's getting arrested," I commented. "So, uh, how are you doing?"

"Leg, chest, head, it hurts, but it's much better with you here." He sounded so sincere. His words made me melt.

"Um, Edward

,there's something I have to tell you." His NDE (near death experience) made me realize exactly how fragile humans are, and how simply and suddenly life can be taken away from us. I felt the need to tell him the truth.

"I—I love you," I said. "I've always been reluctant with you because I made a promise, a life plan, and it didn't involve you. Or anyone else but myself, really. But I need you. I don't want it anymore. You make me be better than what I would've been with that plan. I love you."

I leaned my head on my shoulder, but with his hand he lifted it up and made me look at him. "I love you, too, Bella," he said.

And the moment was completed by my lips meeting briefly with his before leaning back and smiling sweetly.

……….

It's senior year now-- our first day. And I can safely say that I have never been happier with life.

The girls at school didn't even bother to glare at me anymore, the boys didn't ask me out, I had every class with at least one of the Cullen kids, and everything was perfect. And I know people hate a fairytale ending that's so sweet and perfect that it just can't be real. But maybe it is. I don't care. I would never trade this for anything.

After school, I'm going to college, taking some creative writing courses, and I'm going to study to be a great writer. And I'm going to have Edward by my side. That, I don't have to worry about. I was going to work for what I wanted the hard way. That was how I wanted life.

For now, what I'd mostly have to worry about was Prom. I'm sure Alice is already out somewhere picking out the dress.

But now, all I want is what I have, and all I have is what I want.

Good-bye.


	18. Thank you

**I've kept an open mind, and I think a Sequel could be written, but only if this gets enough response. The last chapter was also the shortest chapter ever. Some credit must go to my brother for the idea of 'My GPS told me to!', for my Dad because he told me what you could break, and for my mother who crashed and we got the inspiration. No one was hurt, but the GPS kept saying 'Bear right'. Stupid GPS, I hope you're alone in the tool shed, Lola! LOL. Um, so, please review. I must simply say two things:**

**1) I've had this written for a long time now. I only made minor changes. It's been written since mid-October.**

**2) A last Author's Note.**

**Thank you:**

**Everyone who has read this story, my brothers, my friends, thank you, because you cheer me on. Even if my friends don't care that I write, I love it when Marcela posted on Face-book "Dude, I finished your story. I'm hooked!" And in my opinion, that was the story that was mostly pure fluff. **

**Anyways, love you. Thank you for reading. Good-bye.**


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